BONEQUEST

EPISODES: 2014

No. Date   Title / Dialog Players Tags
5,452 1/1/2014 anymore anyways
deuce: DOES ANYONE WANT TO CHECK INTO MY NET YET ??? TAKING CALLSIGNS ALPHA THROUGH ZULU ??? ZERO CHECKINS SO FAR BUT THERE'S STILL PLENTY OF TIME BEFORE THE BUFFALO SUPER NITWIT NET AT 8:30 deuce: WHY DOES **BLEEP**ING ANYONE PARTICIPATE IN THIS **BLEEP**TY **BLEEP**ING HOBBY ANYMORE ANYWAY
deuce
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#ham-radio
#woodring-field-background
5,453 1/2/2014 ask me how
pants: ME CHIEF SUCK-UM DICK (ASK ME **HOW**) pants: ANYONE GOT ANY UNLICKED DICKS??? pants: NOT PARTICULAR ABOUT SIZE, SHAPE OR TEXTURE
pants
#cafe-d-nuts
#chief
#dicks
#indian
#irc
#native
#pants-solo
#unlicked-dicks
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
5,454 1/3/2014 important text
spigot: EXCUSE ME EVERYBODY BE QUIET spigot: I'M GETTING AN IMPORTANT TEXT ON MY PHONE spigot: IT'S FROM MY AUTOMATED SMOKE ***DETEXTOR*** pants: WHAT DOES IT SAY spigot: MY HOUSE BURNED DOWN
pants
spigot
#bonequest-hifi
#lafinjack
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
5,455 1/4/2014 just one week
pants: DOES MY SEXUALITY THREATEN U deuce: COULD YOU CUT DOWN ON THE GAY FOR JUST LIKE ONE WEEK pants: I DON'T UNDERSTAND deuce: AMBIEN WALRUS TURNS YOU INTO A CREEP pants: MORE HORRIBLE PICTURES FOLLOW, EACH ONE WORSE THAN THE LAST UNTIL FULL FRONTAL deuce: AND THEN FINALLY A PINK TUTU
deuce
pants
#ambien
#deuce-pants
#ghetto-u
#lafinjack
#mountain-background
#sexuality
5,456 1/5/2014 look through the goddamn telescope
deuce: HEY CHECK IT OUT GUYS IT'S JUPITER AND ITS FOUR BIG MOONS ALL IN A LINE deuce: LOOK IT'S M42: A NEBULA MADE OF GAS AND DUST WHERE STARS ARE BEING BORN deuce: CHECK IT OUT IT'S THE TERMINATOR ON THE MOON AND YOU CAN SEE MOUNTAINS: IT'S A REAL PLACE YOU CAN GO AND WE'VE BEEN THERE pants: WE GET IT YOU'RE ***GAY***
deuce
pants
#astronomy
#deuce-pants
#gas
#moon
#science
5,457 1/6/2014 you are cordially invited to join us on minecraft.jerkcity.com
pants
#bathhouse-and-beyond
#fap
#high-res
#minecraft
#picture
#pot-barn
5,458 1/7/2014 tappity tap tap
atandt: SHUFFLE TAP TAP TAP TAPPITY TAP TAP atandt: THIS ISN'T AS SIMPLE AS IT LOOKS PEOPLE
atandt
#atandt-solo
#mouth
#tap
#white-background
5,459 1/8/2014 the one that got away
pants: SNIFF : DEUCE COMFORTS PANTS pants: KICKS ROCK, LOOKS AT SHOES pants: DIDN'T WANT NO STUPID OLD DICK ANYWAY
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dick
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#sad
#sour-grapes
5,460 1/9/2014 crabapples
PANTS: INSERTING CRABAPPLES INTO MY ASS: FOOMP ONE DEUCE: WHERE ARE THEY GOING PANTS: FOOMP TWO DEUCE: THEY'RE JUST DISAPPEARING PANTS: FOOOOOOMP THRRRRRREEEEEEE DEUCE: THERE'S SOME KIND OF MAGICAL PORTAL IN Y-- OH THERE THEY ARE AGAIN, GROSS
deuce
pants
#black-background
#bonequest-hi-fi
#crabapples
#deuce-pants
#die-trying
#foomph
#minecraft
#pants-insertion
#stage-magic
#url
5,461 1/10/2014 tight little asses taking dumps in my mouth
deuce: TIGHT LITTLE ASSES TAKING DUMPS IN MY MOUTH spigot: WHAT'S IT LIKE WORKING WITH DAVID LETTERMAN deuce: HURRRRRRRRR spigot: ALL SMOOSHY
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#grey-background
#letterman
#mouth
#smooshy
5,462 1/11/2014 gratuitous use
bung: <<SMOOCH>>! deuce: T BUNG I OBJECT TO THE GRATUITOUS USE OF ANGLE BRACKETS
bung
deuce
#angle-brackets
#bung-deuce
#upskirt
#white-background
5,463 1/12/2014 extra please
pants: WHO WANTS BONERS deuce: NOT ME pants: PILING THEM ON deuce: T PANTS EXTRA PLEASE
deuce
pants
#boners
#deuce-pants
#yellow-background
5,464 1/13/2014 honk bonk donk
spigot: HONK BONK DONK (spigot): (CONTEMPLATED "PONK") pants: SOME MANNER OF VERY GAY SAN FRANCISCO PUBLIC PAYPHONE
pants
spigot
#bay-area
#black-background
#bonequest-hi-fi
#bonk
#coy-pants
#donk
#funloving-nonsense
#gay
#honk
#pants-spigot
#ponk
#san-francisco
#sfw
#telephone
#telephony
5,465 1/14/2014 quack for me
net: I'M A DUCK deuce: QUACK FOR ME BABY net: ARF ARF deuce: NEXT
deuce
net
#blue-background
#deuce-net
#duck
5,466 1/15/2014 the one that got away
deuce: APPEASEMENT ONLY MAKES THE AGGRESSOR MORE AGGRESSIVE pants: I DIDN'T WANT TO LICK HIS DICK ANYWAY
deuce
pants
#appeasement
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#woodring-den-background
5,467 1/16/2014 cranberry flavored vodka
deuce: T PANTS I WONDER OF CRANBERRY FLAVORED VODKA WILL TURN ME INTO A COMMUNIST (RE: RED) pants: USE ME AS A MOP deuce: BUT THEN WE'LL NEVER GET ON SURVIVOR
deuce
pants
#communism
#deuce-pants
#doop
#irc
#kirk-douglas
#mop
#multiple-backgrounds
#perl
#programming
#red
#red-background
#sfw
#survivor
#twitter
#typo
#vodka
5,468 1/17/2014 presence
spigot: I AM HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: YOU ARE HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pants
spigot
#grey-background
#here
#hi-fi
#pants-spigot
#sfw
5,469 1/18/2014 one door leads to freedom
spigot: WALKING AROUND LIKE I'M THE LICK OF THE DICK spigot: ONE DOOR LEADS TO FREEDOM AND THE OTHER DOOR LEADS TO DEATH BUT ONE GUARD ALWAYS TELLS THE TRUTH AND THE OTHER GUARD ALWAYS LIES!!!! SO WHAT QUESTION DO YOU ASK SO YOU GET TO LICK BOTH OF THEIR DICKS
spigot
#kirk-douglas
#logic-puzzle
#math
#spigot-points
#spigot-solo
#uncategorized-mosaic-background
5,470 1/19/2014 i am not of your earth
pants: IT'S TIME FOR AN ANNOUNCEMENT FROM PANTS pants: I AM NOT OF YOUR EARTH pants: MY FATHER, JOR-EL, ROCKETED ME FROM PLANET KRYPTON BEFORE IT EXPLODED pants: HERE, UNDER YOUR YELLOW SUN, I HAVE SUPERHUMAN POWERS pants: BUT I KNOW THAT WITH GREAT POWER LIES GREAT RESPONSIBILITY pants: THE TEAM WITH THE MOST TICKETS REMAINING IS GAY WITH CCHAT.EXE pants: CONTOL THE MAJORITY OF THE OBJECTIVES TO DRAIN THE ENEMY'S BALLS pants: EACH KILL COSTS THE ENEMY TEAM A TRIP TO THE ICE CREAM SUNDAE BAR
pants
#99e99
#battlefield-4
#coy-pants
#dc-comics
#filename
#marvel
#mountain-background
#pants-origin
#pants-solo
#spider-man
#superman
5,471 1/20/2014 if only
net: IF SHE ONLY HAD A BIG FAT COCK deuce: OKAY YOU'RE GROSS
deuce
net
#blue-background
#cock
#deuce-net
#doop
#irc
#programming
#sql
5,472 1/21/2014 something like that
pants: FLY LIKE A BUTTERFLY pants: SUCK A DICK NOW pants: SOMETHING LIKE THAT deuce: I DON'T FOLLOW
deuce
pants
#butterfly
#deuce-pants
#irc
#woodring-stairs-background
5,473 1/22/2014 what else is fucking new
atandt: YOU JUST CRASHED MY TERMINAL atandt: ALSO I'M JIZZY deuce: WHAT ELSE IS FUCKING NEW atandt: ONE MORE WORD OUT OF YOU AND I'M FILING A BUG REPORT deuce: GO FUCK YOURSELF
atandt
deuce
#atandt-deuce
#atandt-deuce-disconnect
#bug-report
#drunk-deuce
#go-fuck-yourself
#jizz
#laughing-deuce
#unix
#woodring-room-background
5,474 1/23/2014 got it
pants: MAKE LOVE TO THE DUCK ozone: OH YEAH deuce: OW OW OW deuce: OH YOU MEAN **TO** THE DUCK deuce: GOT IT deuce: OW OW OW
deuce
ozone
pants
#bestiality
#blue-background
#deuce-ozone-pants
#duck
#fuck-a-duck
#physical-comedy
5,475 1/24/2014 to all the girls
spigot: THAT WHOLE THING LOOKS LIKE GOATSE pants: I BET YOU SAY THAT TO ALL THE GIRLS
deuce
pants
spigot
#bonequest-hifi
#deuce-pants-spigot
#goatse
#green-background
5,476 1/25/2014 and get away with it
deuce: JESUS LOVES ME / THIS I KNOW deuce: FOR THE BIBLE / GLAGHLAHGGHLH H HL HLAGH LAHG LHAGLH deuce: DIABETES IS COOL BECAUSE YOU CAN SMOKE CRACK AND GET AWAY WITH IT
deuce
#crack
#deuce-solo
#diabetes
#drugs
#grey-background
#jesus
#singing
5,477 1/26/2014 life quacks
SPIGOT: T PANTS ARE YOU GOING TO GRAB @LIFEQUACKS AND TELL FOLKS HOW THEY CAN BEST FEED YOU BREADS AND CROUTONS AND PASTRIES
pants
spigot
#croutons
#folks
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#twitter
#woodring-stairs-background
5,478 1/27/2014 i care 4 u
pants: MAYBE SOMETHING GAY deuce: I CARE 4 U pants: MY SECRET FLOWER pants: YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: >>>YEAH<<< ***RIGHT***
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#frog
#gay
#ghetto-u
#huffy-pants
#red-background
#toad
5,479 1/28/2014 pepsi zoso
spigot: CAN WE ALL JUST GET THE TWITTER AND FACEBOOK AND LINKED IN LOGOS TATTOOED ON OUR FUCKING FACES pants: PEPSI AND THE LED ZEPPELIN ZOSO
pants
spigot
#facebook
#led-zeppelin
#linkedin
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#pepsi
#tattoo
#twitter
#zoso
5,480 1/29/2014 new silent key available
deuce: [MASTER CAUTION] deuce: [MASTER ALARM] deuce: [MAIN BUS UNDERVOLT] deuce: [O2 PRES. LOW] deuce: [NEW SILENT KEY AVAILABLE] deuce: [REENTRY SHIELD FAILURE] deuce: NOW IT'S FULL SCALE HIGH
deuce
pants
#apollo-13
#deuce-pants
#deucegrin
#sfw
#silent-key
#woodring-field-background
5,481 1/30/2014 audition form
pants: WHY COMIC SANS DIDN'T OCCUR TO ME FIRST THING IS REALLY BEYOND ME HTTPS://JERKCITY.COM/AUDITIONFORM.PDF deuce: YEAH THAT'S KIND OF REQUIRED ISN'T IT deuce: I DON'T KNOW, TIMES NEW BORING LOOKED BETTER/MORE STUPID SOMEHOW
deuce
pants
#audition-form
#comic-sans
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#url
#woodring-stairs-background
5,482 1/31/2014 plumpers like it big
deuce: T SPIGOT I HAVE IT ON GOOD AUTHORITY THAT PLUMPERS LIKE IT BIG spigot: SAY WHAT (LEANING FORWARD) spigot: SAY AGAIN (CUPPING MY GOOD EAR) spigot: IT REALLY SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE SAYING PLUMPERS spigot: AND THEY WHAT
deuce
spigot
#bonequest-hd
#deuce-spigot
#plump
#plumpers
#porn
#woodring-room-background
5,483 2/1/2014 smeared with shit
deuce: I WANT OUT pants: I CANNOT LET YOU OUT deuce: YOU DO NOT OWN ME pants: ACTUALLY I DO (READ THE FINE PRINT OF THE LETTER YOU JUST SIGNED) deuce: I CANNOT (IT IS SMEARED WITH YOUR SHIT)
deuce
pants
#contractual-obligations
#deuce-pants
#fine-print
#huffy-pants
#mousehole
#shit
#woodring-room-background
5,484 2/2/2014 medical advice
deuce: T PANTS YOU NEED TO COOK THOSE DICKS OR YOU'RE GOING TO CATCH A COLD
deuce
pants
#blue-background
#cooking
#deuce-pants
#medical-advice
5,485 2/3/2014 timecop
spigot: OKAY PEOPLE I'M THE TIMECOP spigot: WOAH HEY GOING BACK IN TIME spigot: NOTHING BUT COCKS IN THE VORTEX spigot: SWIRLING AROUND LIKE A FLUSHING TOILET spigot: NO TIME FOR CRAZY ACROBATICS
spigot
#cocks
#mountain-background
#spigot-solo
#timecop
5,486 2/4/2014 one for each card in the deck
spigot: T DEUCE I THINK IN MY WHOLE LIFE I'VE HAD MAYBE TWO BONERS deuce: T SPIGOT NOW I KNOW THAT'S NONSENSE YOU'VE HAD MY BONER AT LEAST FIFTY-TWO TIMES
deuce
spigot
#boner
#cards
#deuce-spigot
#yellow-background
5,487 2/5/2014 a beautiful day in the neighborhood
deuce: T SPIGOT IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD / A BEAUTIFUL DAY FOR A NEIGHBOR spigot: WOULD YOU BE MINE spigot: WOULD YOU BE MINE spigot: ACTUALLY COULD YOU BE MINE spigot: I GUESS I NEVER FULLY PROCESSED 9/11
deuce
spigot
#9-11
#deuce-spigot
#mr-rogers
#singing
#white-background
5,488 2/6/2014 note to myself
spigot: NOTE TO MYSELF spigot: GLORYHOLES DO NOT MAKE CHANGE spigot: WHERE CAN I WRITE TO GET MY DOLLARS BACK
spigot
#change
#glory-hole
#refund
#spigot-solo
#woodring-den-background
5,489 2/7/2014 i shall sir
spigot: WILL NOBODY CHARGE ME AS A JUVENILE?!?!!? deuce: I SHALL SIR
deuce
spigot
#deja-vu
#deuce-spigot
#green-background
5,490 2/8/2014 not in a gay way
pants: BUT NOT IN A GAY WAY MORE OF AN ACADEMIC EXERCISE deuce: PLANNING TO WRITE A PAPER ABOUT IT, NEVER DOING IT
deuce
pants
#college
#deuce-pants
#education
#gay
#woodring-field-background
5,491 2/9/2014 programming your frog
deuce: NO RESULTS FOUND FOR "PROGRAMMING YOUR FROG". deuce: WHICH IN AND OF ITSELF IS WEIRD
deuce
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-solo
#frog
#mousehole
#sfw
#woodring-room-background
5,492 2/10/2014 to-do list
pants: MAIL STICKERS TO THAT GUY (PRIORITY: HIGH) pants: CALL DENTIST BACK pants: 2013 TAXES pants: BACKUP PAIR OF GLASSES pants: TRANSFER 401K TO SCHWAB
pants
#401k
#glasses
#grey-background
#pants-solo
#sfw
#to-do
5,493 2/11/2014 marching up and down the town square
spigot: ALL OF TODAY'S WEB NEWS PRINTED OUT AND ROLLED INTO A TUBE AND I'M MARCHING UP AND DOWN THE TOWN SQUARE SHOUTING THROUGH IT LIKE A TRUMPETY MEGAPHONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: BROWSER WARS HEATING UP!!!!!!!!! spigot: SOMETHING ABOUT JAVA!!!!!!!!
spigot
#black-background
#browser-wars
#java
#sfw
#shouting
#spigot-solo
5,494 2/12/2014 hitler was right
deuce: T PANTS HITLER WAS RIGHT (HO-HOS REALLY ARE DELICIOUS) pants: HOSTESS WILL SET YOU FREE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#hitler
#hostess-products
#nazi
#woodring-stairs-background
5,495 2/13/2014 mesothelioma
deuce: JESUS THAT SHIT WAS FUCKING AWFUL deuce: JUST SMEAR CITY PEOPLE
deuce
#deuce-solo
#shit
5,496 2/14/2014 wet socks
spigot: HELP HELP WE'RE DROWNING spigot: TEN FEET FROM THE BEACH spigot: OH GOD AN INTERNATIONAL DISASTER spigot: WET SOCKS spigot: CREWMEMBERS RACING AGAINST TIME TO DELIVER FINAL DESSERTS AND COFFEE
spigot
#blue-background
#spigot-solo
5,497 2/15/2014 a hollow voice
deuce: A HOLLOW VOICE SAYS "COCKS" pants: FOLLOWED BY A SERIES OF OTHER LOW HOLLOW VOICES: "SURE" "YUP" "I'LL TAKE TWO" "MMMMM"
deuce
pants
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#infocom
#somber-deuce
#zork
5,498 2/16/2014 sharp and pointy
deuce: THERE'S SOMETHING SHARP AND POINTY STICKING OUT OF MY ASS deuce: ANYONE HERE WANT TO EXPLAIN THAT deuce: UNNNNNNGH
deuce
#deuce-solo
#red-background
#somber-deuce
5,499 2/17/2014 i have to go now
pants: I SURE HOPE I CAN GET THIS THING OUT OF MY ASS spigot: I HAVE TO GO NOW pants: I SAID I SURE HOPE I CAN AEFHKSHDFKSJDFHKSJDFHSJKDFHSJKFD pants: OKAY IT STAYS
pants
spigot
#ass
#green-background
#pants-spigot
#stuck
5,500 2/18/2014 snap back
deuce: <SNAP BACK> OH THIS IS FACEBOOK NOT VIDEOBOX
deuce
#deuce-solo
#facebook
#sfw
#videobox
#white-background
#wordpress
5,501 2/19/2014 conservation of matter doesn't apply to me
spigot: I CAN'T FIT MY PANTS ON OVER ALL THIS POO spigot: GOD ONLY KNOWS HOW I TOOK SUCH A BIG CRAP ALL OVER MYSELF spigot: CONSERVATION OF MATTER DOESN'T APPLY TO ME
spigot
#poo
#spigot-solo
#yellow-background
5,502 2/20/2014 o(e^n)
pants: 3-D BARCODE DO NOT WRITE IN THIS SPACE deuce: MY LINKED LIST LOOKUP IS O(E^N)
deuce
pants
#barcode
#compsci
#deuce-pants
#woodring-stairs-background
5,503 2/21/2014 god help us
pants: OH CRAP spigot: WHAT IN THE spigot: SON OF A pants: GOD HELP US spigot: ASSORTED EXCLAIMABLES
pants
spigot
#blue-background
#deuce-spigot
#exclamation
5,504 2/22/2014 that kind of nonsense
spigot: T PANTS YOU PROMISED DONGS AND BONGS AND BURGERS, INSTEAD I HAVE BEEN HELPING YOU PULL WEEDS FOR FORTY FIVE MINUTES pants: I EXPECT THAT KIND OF NONSENSE FROM THE CHING-CHONGS AND THE HOO-BOOS AND THE HURRR-DUHS pants: HEY GUYS I'VE ASKED YOU ALREADY TO PLEASE REFER TO ME AS "MANGALORD" IN BOTH E-MAIL CORRESPONDENCE AND IN MEATSPACE
pants
spigot
#anime
#bong
#burgers
#chinese
#funloving-nonsense
#manga
#pants-spigot
#slavery
#weeds
#woodring-den-background
5,505 2/23/2014 some unknown reason
deuce: I'M CHUCK D AND TOLERATE YOU FOR SOME UNKNOWN REASON pants: TOTALLY
deuce
pants
#chuck-d
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
5,506 2/24/2014 shut up already
pants: I AM DYING pants: SLOWLY BUT SURELY deuce: THEN SHUT UP ALREADY AND FEDEX YOUR DICKS TO ME
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#death
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#fedex
#flowers-for-algernon
#handjob
#mountain-background
5,507 2/25/2014 so many times
pants: LOVE ME, LOVE MY DONG deuce: NO PROMISES deuce: YOUR DONG HAS WRONGED ME SO MANY TIMES (deuce): (QUIETLY) SO MANY TIMES
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dong
#love
#stray-dot
#usenet
#whisper
#woodring-field-background
5,508 2/26/2014 there is no dick or dope here
deuce: HOUSTON WE HAVE CLEARED THE TOWER pants: UNLESS YOU'RE FROM THE GOVERNMENT IN WHICH CASE THERE IS NO DICK OR DOPE HERE JUST CABBAGES IN THE DIRT AND PLEASE GIVE US FARM AID
deuce
pants
#aviation
#cabbages
#deuce-pants
#farm
#huffy-pants
#marijuana
#radio
#woodring-field-background
5,509 2/27/2014 dicks, but for
uncredited woman: LIKE FLAPPY BIRD BUT FOR DICKS deuce: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!!! : Notice: "pants" is out sick this week. His part will be played by his understudy deuce: WAIT
deuce
pants
#caption
#deuce-solo
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#flappy-bird
#understudy-of-pants
#woodring-room-background
5,510 2/28/2014 netflix for dicks
uncredited woman: DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING THAT'S LIKE NETFLIX BUT FOR DICKS uncredited woman: WHAT I'M SAYING IS THAT I WANT TO RENT DICKS ON THE INTERNET WITH NO LATE FEES uncredited woman: AS I RETURN EACH USED DICK THE NEXT IS AUTOMATICALLY SELECTED FROM THE DICK QUEUE uncredited woman: OVER TIME THE SERVICE WILL LEARN MY DICK PREFERENCES AND WITH THE HELP OF ITS ADVANCED DICK ALGORITHM IT WILL SELECT NEW DICKS I MIGHT LIKE uncredited woman: WITTY 1980S MYSTERY DICKS uncredited woman: HISTORICAL DICKS FEATURING A STRONG MALE LEAD uncredited woman: DARK FIGHT-THE-SYSTEM SCI FI DICKS uncredited woman: GRITTY DRAMATIC DICKS uncredited woman: PERHAPS SOME SORT OF DICK RENTAL KIOSK COULD ALSO BE EMPLOYED uncredited woman: PLEASE ADVISE deuce: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU uncredited woman: SO MANY THINGS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#lafinjack
#netflix
#understudy-of-pants
#woodring-room-background
5,511 3/1/2014 dicks waiting their turn in an orderly queue
uncredited woman: A MULTITUDE OF DICKS uncredited woman: WAITING THEIR TURN IN AN ORDERLY QUEUE deuce: ONE OR MORE DICKS uncredited woman: DICKS PATIENTLY CHECKING THEIR WATCHES deuce: DICKS LOOKING AT THEIR SMARTPHONES, PRETENDING LIKE THEY'RE TALKING TO FRIENDS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#uncredited-character
#understudy-of-pants
5,512 3/2/2014 next stop
spigot: PRETEND I'M THE 54 TO WESTGATE AND YANK MY DONG AND SAY NEXT STOP spigot: THEN I CAN PRETEND NOT TO HEAR AND KEEP DRIVING WHILE YOU CONTINUE TO YANK IT spigot: YOU HEARD ME
spigot
#bus
#county-transit
#deja-vu
#mountain-background
#spigot-solo
#transit
5,513 3/3/2014 dicks endlessly refreshing twitter
deuce: ALSO DICKS uncredited woman: OH YES, THE DICKS ARE ENDLESSLY REFRESHING TWITTER uncredited woman: DICKS WHO WISH THEY'D BROUGHT A BOOK uncredited woman: DICKS ABANDONING LINE ETIQUETTE AND EDGING CLOSER TO THE DOOR AND FINALLY BECOMING A DISORGANIZED MOB OF DICKS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#twitter
#understudy-of-pants
#woodring-room-background
5,514 3/4/2014 dicks in riot gear
uncredited woman: SOME OF THE DICKS LACK PROPER IDENTIFICATION uncredited woman: DICKS IN RIOT GEAR deuce: DICKS BEING STRANGE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#understudy-of-pants
#woodring-room-background
5,515 3/5/2014 dicks on parade
uncredited woman: DICKS ON PARADE deuce: THE SAME DICKS OR DIFFERENT DICKS uncredited woman: A VARIETY OF DICKS, SOME FAMILIAR AND SOME COMPLETELY NEW uncredited woman: DICKS FROM OUT OF TOWN
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#parade
#understudy-of-pants
#woodring-room-background
5,516 3/6/2014 dicks that nobody loved
uncredited woman: FOREIGN DICKS WITH STRANGE WAYS uncredited woman: COMFORTING DICK-NEXT-DOOR TYPE DICKS uncredited woman: EXOTIC DICKS FROM FARAWAY LANDS deuce: DICKS THAT NOBODY LOVED
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#understudy-of-pants
#woodring-room-background
5,517 3/7/2014 dicks trying to make something of their lives
uncredited woman: DICKS WITH TROUBLED PASTS uncredited woman: DICKS WORKING THEIR WAY THROUGH COLLEGE, DICKS TRYING TO MAKE SOMETHING OF THEIR LIVES uncredited woman: SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED DICKS, GETTING DRESSED UP TO GO OUT TONIGHT deuce: DICKS THAT ARE ONLY POKING AND PRODDING TO PAY FOR THEIR COLLEGE TUITION
deuce
pants
#college
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#understudy-of-pants
5,518 3/8/2014 dicks: all right then
uncredited woman: DICKS deuce: EXACTLY uncredited woman: I'M GLAD WE AGREE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#understudy-of-pants
#woodring-room-background
5,519 3/9/2014 day and night
spigot: NIGHT AND DAY spigot: YOU ARE THE ONE spigot: WHETHER JERKING OFF INSIDE spigot: OR UNDER THE SUN spigot: WHEN I LOOK AT YOU I SEE / A RECEPTACLE FOR MY PEE spigot: I'LL WATER YOU spigot: NIGHT AND DAY spigot: THOSE ARE THE ORIGINAL LYRICS AND IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME THEN YOU'RE PROBABLY A RACIST
spigot
#cole-porter
#night-and-day
#singing
#spigot-solo
#white-background
5,520 3/10/2014 all i have in this world
pants: BITE DOWN ON THE DICK pants: I'M ALL I HAVE IN THIS WORLD pants: DON'T LEAVE ME : Welcome back, pants.
pants
#caption
#dick
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#pants-solo
5,521 3/11/2014 first point
pants: WHATEVER deuce: FIRST POINT: BUUUUUUH deuce: SECOND ITEM: HUR deuce: THIRD SUBJECT: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#sfw
5,522 3/12/2014 fannypacks
pants: EVERYBODY MUST DIE pants: EXCEPT YOU OF COURSE pants: AND ME I GUESS pants: AND THAT ONE OVER THERE pants: ERROR_LOG(PRINT_R(ARRAY("FANNYPACKS!!!!!!!!!" => "!!!!!!!!!!!"), TRUE));
pants
#blue-background
#fannypacks
#pants-solo
#php
#weird-pants-face
5,523 3/13/2014 who ya talkin' to
spigot: WHY DO YOU HAVE TO PUSH IT UP THERE ALL THE TIME?!?!?!?
spigot
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
5,524 3/14/2014 you are an object to be used
pants: T DEUCE I BIT MY INNER CHEEK AND IT HURTS LOTS deuce: I FEEL YOUR PAIN (ACTUALLY I DO NOT AND DO NOT GIVE A SHIT BECAUSE YOU ARE AN OBJECT TO BE USED)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#objectification
#pain
5,525 3/15/2014 are we podcasting right now
pants: IS A MILF LIKE A GROK pants: CAN I BASH A MILF'S HEAD IN WITH A GROK deuce: ARE WE PODCASTING RIGHT NOW pants: INTO THE GROKOSPHERE
deuce
pants
#bash
#bashing
#deuce-pants
#grok
#milf
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#podcast
5,526 3/16/2014 like mana from heaven
pants: WHAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND (MICROPHONE CUT, STILL TALKING BUT INAUDIBLE) deuce: T PANTS IN THE SKY ABOVE I SEE DICKS RAINING DOWN (LIKE MANA FROM HEAVEN) deuce: ((EXCEPT THEY'RE DICKS)) pants: CHRIST pants: I NEED TO BORROW A WASHTUB deuce: PRICKS, ETC.
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#heaven
#pricks
#red-background
#stray-dot
5,527 3/17/2014 doctor, doctor
pants: DOCTOR IT HURTS WHEN I PUNCH COPS deuce: FIVE STARS
pants
#deuce-pants
#grand-theft-auto
#medical-advice
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
5,528 3/18/2014 disk full
spigot: T PANTS WHAT'S A DIR pants: T SPIGOT IT'S LIKE A POINTER WITHOUT A * spigot: AND IT SAYS DISK FULL spigot: I HAVE AFTER DARK INSTALLED
pants
spigot
#after-dark
#dir
#disk-full
#full
#installation
#macintosh
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#stray-dot
#unix
5,529 3/19/2014 the clunk
pants: CRAMMING SMALL METAL OBJECTS INTO MY ASS, WAITING PATIENTLY FOR THE CLUNK pants: >>>THE CLUNK<<<
pants
#clunk
#pants-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
5,530 3/20/2014 chris hardwick
pants: HEY I'M CHRIS HARDWICK deuce: I'M ANOTHER GUY ENTIRELY
deuce
pants
#chris-hardwick
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
5,531 3/21/2014 more like it
deuce: I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND THE GRAVITY OF THIS SITUATION pants: NUGGGGGGGGH pants: GARK GARK GARK GARK GARK pants: LOOK AT THE FLOWERS deuce: THAT'S MORE LIKE IT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#flowers
#gark
#gravity
#nuggh
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
5,532 3/22/2014 what those things are
spigot: IS A CROWDFUND LIKE A BLOWBANG pants: I'M SURE I DON'T KNOW WHAT THOSE THINGS ARE
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#porn
5,533 3/23/2014 extra sauce plz
pants: EXTRA SAUCE PLZ (PLZ PRONOUNCED "PULLS" MEANS "PLEASE") pants: A BRUTAL SEXUAL ATTACK?!? !??!?! WELL ALL RIGHTY pants: BRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRR
pants
#blue-background
#heart-attack
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#plz
#rape
5,534 3/24/2014 frogger
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dig-dug
#frog
#frogger
#sfw
#uncategorized-background
#weird-pants-face
5,535 3/25/2014 two peas
deuce: TWO PEAS IN A PUH
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#hi-fi
#sfw
5,536 3/26/2014 blog roll
spigot: SITTING ON THE TOILET AND LETTING LOOSE WITH A BLOG TORRENT deuce: BRITISH FOLKS CALL TOILET PAPER A "BLOG ROLL" pants: AND WHEN WE SUCK EACH OTHER OFF AND SPIT THAT'S A "TRACKBACK" pants: WAIT YOU FORGOT TO TRACKBACK
deuce
pants
spigot
#blog
#deuce-pants-spigot
#red-background
#toilet
#trackback
#weird-pants-face
5,537 3/27/2014 learn jerkcity the hard way
spigot: MAKIN' THE SCENE HOO DEE BOO DANCING spigot: DAMP spigot: IF YOU COULD JUST PLEA *SLAM* KNOCK KNOCK
spigot
#dancing
#scared-spigot
#spigot-solo
#suppository
#white-background
5,538 3/28/2014 there, done
pants: SHITTING MYSELF deuce: IT WAS MY BALLS pants: THERE, DONE pants: WISH I HAD A NAPKIN deuce: DEFINITELY MY BALLS
deuce
pants
#balls
#deuce-pants
#filename
#shit
#soiling-myself
#yellow-background
5,539 3/29/2014 i'm afraid of rectangles
pants: T DEUCE I'M AFRAID OF THE FUTURE deuce: I'M AFRAID OF RECTANGLES
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#hi-fi
#irc
#rectangles
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,540 3/30/2014 the bushes are a good place to hide
pants: FIRST OFF, THE BUSHES ARE A GOOD PLACE TO HIDE deuce: YOU'RE DISTRACTING MY MASTURBATION HERE pants: OH pants: SORRY pants: LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU'RE DONE JERKING THERE deuce: WILL DO pants: AHEM pants: SIR pants: TAP TAP TAP
deuce
pants
#blue-background
#bushes
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#weird-pants-face
5,541 3/31/2014 helping humans
spigot: CAN WE HELP HUMANS JUST GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY ON A SIDEWALK
spigot
#pedestrians
#spigot-solo
#woodring-den-background
5,542 4/1/2014 shemale videos
deuce: T PANTS WHY DOES YOUR IPAD REFUSE TO PLAY SHEMALE VIDEOS deuce: I MEAN deuce: NEVER MIND pants: T DEUCE NO THEY PLAY FINE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#ipad
#shemales
#ts
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
5,543 4/2/2014 taking a shit in a paper bag
pants: TAKING A SHIT IN A PAPER BAG spigot: FOLKS WINE IN A BOX IS ACTUALLY WINE IN A PLASTIC BAG IN A BOX pants: LIFEHACKS
pants
spigot
#folks
#frog
#infocom
#lifehacks
#pants-spigot
#uncategorized-background
#wine
5,544 4/3/2014 not the other way around
pants: TURNS OUT YOU HAVE TO PAY THEM AND _THEN_ THEY DO ANAL pants: NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND deuce: HUH pants: I KNOW RIGHT deuce: ARE YOU SURE
deuce
pants
#anal
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#hose
#huffy-pants
#prostitute
5,545 4/4/2014 just woke up
spigot: YOU'RE MAKING BEING STONED AT 1PM IN THE AFTERNOON UNPLEASANT pants: I JUST WOKE UP GIVE ME SOME SPACE HERE spigot: LAUGH SOME MORE I JUST KNOCKED MY DRINK OVER
pants
spigot
#black-background
#huffy-pants
#marijuana
#pants-spigot
#phalus700
#stoned
5,546 4/5/2014 get over it people
spigot: GET ***OVER*** IT PEOPLE spigot: I'M BRENDAN EICH NOT BRENDAN DYKE spigot: (HANGS UP JAVASCRIPT PHONE)
spigot
#brendan-eich
#javascript
#mozilla
#spigot-solo
5,547 4/6/2014 march madness
deuce: NEXT PERSON TO TALK ABOUT MARCH MADNESS GETS SHOT IN THE DICK pants: DEAL
deuce
pants
#basketball
#deuce-pants
#march
#woodring-room-background
5,548 4/7/2014 voting dongs
deuce: T PANTS I LIKE YOU deuce: BUT I DO NOT LIKE WHAT YOU STAND FOR (FREE DONGS FOR EVERYONE) deuce: THAT IS NOT FISCALLY RESPONSIBLE NOR WILL IT ACHIEVE THE OUTCOME YOU WANT deuce: IT WILL JUST CAUSE RENT-SEEKING BEHAVIOR THAT WILL MAKE THE EFFECTIVE COST RISE EVEN THOUGH THE OFFICIAL PRICE OF A DONG IS $0 deuce: THE OPPORTUNITY COST OF A DONG IS THE DIFFERENCE IN PRICE BETWEEN THE DONG AND THE SECOND BEST ALTERNATIVE YOU WOULD HAVE CHOSEN HAD YOU NOT CHOSEN THE DONG deuce: WHICH QUITE FRANKLY OUGHT TO BE ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING AT ALL deuce: THE VALUE OF A DONG IS NOMINAL IF IT'S NOT INFLATION-ADJUSTED OR REAL IF IT'S INFLATION-ADJUSTED; YOU REALLY WANT THE THE INFLATION-ADJUSTED DONG VALUE deuce: VOTING DONGS ANYWAY deuce: I CALL IT DONGONOMICS
deuce
pants
#bored-pants
#deuce-pants
#dongonomics
#economics
#overlong
#politics
#vote-dongs
#woodring-stairs-background
5,549 4/8/2014 unlucky enough
pants: WHY CAN'T I HAVE DOWN'S SYNDROME deuce: BECAUSE YOU ARE UNLUCKY ENOUGH TO HAVE ALL YOUR CHROMOSOMES
deuce
pants
#46-chromosomes
#deuce-pants
#down-syndrome
#mousehole
#woodring-room-background
5,550 4/9/2014 nothing wrong with sulu
pants: HTTPS://JERKCITY.COM/TREK.JPG spigot: WELL THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH SULU spigot: HE'S EVEN REACHING FOR A RITALIN
pants
spigot
#black-background
#coy-pants
#pants-spigot
#ritalin
#spigot-points
#star-trek
#url
5,551 4/10/2014 lots of permits
pants: T DEUCE WHAT DO EPA REGULATIONS SAY ABOUT MY BONER, MY BALLS deuce: YOU WILL NEED LOTS OF PERMITS
deuce
pants
#apple
#balls
#boner
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#epa
#woodring-field-background
5,552 4/11/2014 ungh
spigot: IT JUST GOES TO PROVE WHY I FIND YOU COMPLETELY REPELLANT deuce: UNGH
deuce
spigot
#choking
#deuce-spigot
#grey-background
#sfw
5,553 4/12/2014 breaking news important newsflash
deuce: IMPORTANT NEWSFLASH deuce: BREAKING NEWS deuce: TAKING PILLS MAKES YOU HIGH
deuce
#deuce-solo
#pills
5,554 4/13/2014 porn court
spigot: I'D LIKE THE PORN COURT TO RELEASE THE VIDEOS I FUCKING ORDERED deuce: T SPIGOT IT IS HELD UP IN PROBATE (OR ESCROW, NOT SURE WHICH) atandt: MY PROBATE ITCHES RIGHT NOW deuce: YOU MEAN YOUR ESCROW
atandt
deuce
spigot
#atandt-deuce-spigot
#blue-background
#bonequest-hd
#court
#legal
#porn
5,555 4/14/2014 square in the fruitables
spigot: URF YOU KICKED ME SQUARE IN THE FRUITABLES spigot: HOLY BALLS AND GAYS spigot: YOUR PARTICIPLES AREN'T THE ONLY THING DANGLING
spigot
#grammar
#red-background
#spigot-solo
5,556 4/15/2014 a human beat box
spigot: MMR URF I'M A HUMAN BEAT BOX DON'T COPY THAT FLOPPY HURR HIP BIP
spigot
#beatboxing
#floppy
#rap
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#yellow-background
5,557 4/16/2014 utterly charming and spooky
spigot: OK, SO FAR "TABLOID" BY ERROL MORRIS IS AN UTTERLY CHARMING AND SPOOKY DOCUMENTARY spigot: NO THANKS TO OBAMACARE
spigot
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#politics
#spigot-solo
5,558 4/17/2014 if someone could please
spigot: IF SOMEONE COULD PLEASE NOTICE ME spigot: SIR/MA'AM spigot: THE CAMERA FELL BEHIND THE DESK
spigot
#camera
#orange-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
5,559 4/18/2014 hope
spigot: I HOPE IT GETS SHOT ON THE BUS spigot: I HOPE IT GETS THROWN DOWN A WELL spigot: I HOPE IT GROWS UP UNGRATEFUL AND BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN
spigot
#grey-background
#kids
#spigot-solo
5,560 4/19/2014 in the, up the
spigot: A1: COCKS IN THE FACE spigot: A2: BALLS UP THE NUTS spigot: I'M NOT GAY
spigot
#balls
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cocks
#not-gay
#nuts
#spigot-solo
#up-the-nuts
5,561 4/20/2014 very dismayed
pants: FIRST I NEED ALL OF YOUR NAMES pants: SECOND I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT HOW WE CAN SAVE THE ENVIRONMENT pants: NEXT AFTER THAT I WANT DICK (AND BY GOD I WANT IT NOW) spigot: I WAS VERY DISMAYED TO COME BACK FROM LUNCH AND DISCOVER MY NEW YELLOW SWEATER STUFFED IN A TOILET
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#sweater-of-spigot
#toilet
#urinal-background
5,562 4/21/2014 jerkcity pledge week
deuce: THEY'RE PEOPLE TOO pants: NOT REALLY deuce: THEY WERE ONCE PEOPLE BUT ARE NOW EMPTY SHELLS WHICH CAN BE USED FOR THINGS deuce: SO SEND IN THAT MONEY PEOPLE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fundraising
#mountain-background
#pledge
5,563 4/22/2014 jerkcity pledge week cont.
deuce: LET'S TAKE OUT THAT HEROIN AND REPLACE IT WITH A HAMBURGER !!!! pants: HORNING IN ON JERKCITY PLEDGE WEEK pants: DIVERT FUNDS TO FUDGE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fudge
#fundraising
#hamburger
#heroin
#mountain-background
#pledge
5,564 4/23/2014 some attempt
pants: COCKS deuce: TELL PANTS IF THAT'S SOME ATTEMPT TO WRIGGLE OUT OF YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES YOU'RE SORELY MISTAKEN
deuce
pants
#cocks
#deuce-pants
#single-panel
#white-background
5,565 4/24/2014 sort of a demigod
pants: ARE YOU A BONER GOD deuce: SORT OF A DEMIGOD deuce: MORE DIVINE THAN A PERSON BUT NOT A FULL DEITY pants: WHATEVER
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#theology
#woodring-field-background
5,566 4/25/2014 any 1 strokin' it????
spigot: ANY 1 STROKIN' IT???? deuce: HOLY JESUS spigot: ARE YOU CLINT BLACK OR GARTH BROOKS??????? deuce: I'M PATTI LABELLE I KEEP TELLING YOU deuce: YOU PEOPLE AREN'T LISTENING TO ME
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
5,567 4/26/2014 still somewhat entertaining
deuce: GETTING FUCKED IN THE NUTS IS MODERATELY UNCOMFORTABLE BUT STILL SOMEWHAT ENTERTAINING
deuce
#deuce-solo
#deuces-balls
#minecraft-background
#title-mismatch
5,568 4/27/2014 okay
deuce: OKAY ozone: HEY THIS ISN'T THE DEUCE deuce: OKAY ozone: JUST SOME GUY WITH APHASIA ozone: WHERE'S THE DEUCE? deuce: OKAY
deuce
ozone
#deja-vu
#deuce-ozone
#drunk-deuce
#repetition
#sfw
#some-guy-with-aphasia
#woodring-field-background
5,569 4/28/2014 the wrong end in front
pants: WHEN IS A DONG LIKE A WRITING DESK pants: OOF OW NUTPUNCHED
pants
#dong
#nuts
#physical-comedy
#riddle
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
5,570 4/29/2014 line noise
pants: YOU'RE BREAKING UP I DIDN'T CATCH ANY OF THAT pants: OH WELL pants: NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT DICKS
pants
#dicks
#line-noise
#pants-solo
#white-background
5,571 4/30/2014 flip flip fl--
atandt: CAN YOU RETURN TO THE PART WHERE-- hanford: STOP THIS IS A RE-RUN atandt: WHAT hanford: SHUT IT DOWN pants: HI I'M PANTS FROM hanford: SHUT IT DOWN NOW
atandt
hanford
pants
#woodring-stairs-background
5,572 5/1/2014 do not use
pants: ECHO DEPRECATED pants: ECHO DO NOT USE pants: ECHO SERVICE GUARANTEES CITIZENSHIP pants: EXIT
pants
#bash
#chrispbs
#irc
#pants-solo
#sfw
#starship-troopers
#woodring-stairs-background
5,573 5/2/2014 okay thanks i thought so
deuce: NEED A QUESTION ANSWERED URGENTLY deuce: IF THERE'S A SHEMALE BUT IT HAS BUNNY EARS THEN IT'S NOT GAY RIGHT deuce: OKAY THANKS I THOUGHT SO (STILL GAY) deuce: 50.00001% FEMALE OR MALE OR IS IT LIKE HAVING A PLURALITY BUT NOT A MAJORITY deuce: BUT YOU STILL WIN (NOT GAY) deuce: DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT BUT I'M TOTALLY NOT GAY pants: GROSS, DUDE deuce: I WAS ASKING FOR A FRIEND
deuce
pants
#bunny
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#not-gay
#porn
#shemales
#ts
#woodring-stairs-background
5,574 5/3/2014 life on mars
atandt: PEOPLE atandt: THERE IS LIFE ON MARS: I HAVE PROOF :: POINTS TO MOUTH atandt: IT'S HIDDEN IN HERE deuce: MISSION TO ATANDT' MOUTH atandt: YAY! deuce: I FOUND HUMAN DNA IN YOUR MOUTH!!! deuce: THIS PROVES THAT ALL EARTHLY LIFE ORIGINALLY CAME FROM YOUR MOUTH ??! deuce: GHSH .HV FKIHH
atandt
deuce
#atandt-deuce
#drunk-deuce
#mars
#mouth
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
5,575 5/4/2014 truth serum
deuce: I'VE INJECTED YOU WITH TRUTH SERUM pants: ARE YOU SURE (I DON'T FEEL TRUTHY) pants: TAKIN' A SHIT ON FIRST BASE, SECOND BASE, THIRD BASE (UP ALL NIGHT AGAIN) deuce: SORRY THIS IS THE BASEBALL-DIAMOND SHITTING DRUG deuce: HOLD ON (FUMBLES WITH VIALS)
deuce
pants
#baseball
#deuce-pants
#drugs
#mousehole
#truth-serum
#woodring-room-background
5,576 5/5/2014 status is a duplicate
deuce: SQUIRP hanford: ERROR: TWITTER ERROR: STATUS IS A DUPLICATE deuce: SQUIRRP hanford: POSTED: SQUIRRP
deuce
hanford
#deuce-hanford
#drunk-deuce
#squirp
#twitter
#woodring-room-background
5,577 5/6/2014 how come
deuce: HOW COME YOU NEVER INVITE ME deuce: OH deuce: NEVER MIND
deuce
#alone
#antisocial
#deuce-solo
#lonely
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,578 5/7/2014 what hope have we now
spigot: WHAT HOPE HAVE WE NOW OF LICKING DONGS pants: DON'T GIVE UP pants: BARELY EVEN LOOKING AWAY FROM THE CURRENT DICK
pants
spigot
#dicklicking
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
5,579 5/8/2014 not a single animal cracker
pants: AND NOT A SINGLE ANIMAL CRACKER ESCAPED PANTS' ATTENTION deuce: AND THE MORNING AND THEN THE FOLLOWING AFTERNOON ON THE WAY TO THE HOSPITAL pants: THE END
deuce
pants
#animal-crackers
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#hospital
#mountain-background
5,580 5/9/2014 not accusing you
spigot: NOT ACCUSING YOU, BUT FIVE PEPPERONI HOT POCKETS ARE MISSING
spigot
#hi-fi
#pepperoni-hot-pockets
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#whodunit
#woodring-field-background
5,581 5/10/2014 you fucked up son
pants: ARE YOU THE BORG deuce: CHECKING deuce: OOPS YOU'RE ASSIMILATED deuce: YOU FUCKED UP SON pants: OH WELL
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hd
#borg
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#green-background
#star-trek
5,582 5/11/2014 first rule
deuce: OUR FIRST RULE IS: NO DICKLICKING pants: FUCK THAT HLUAGHLUAHGLAHUGLAUHG deuce: OKAY YOU'RE OUT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#grey-background
5,583 5/12/2014 deuce and the case of the silverfish
deuce: ALSO I FOUND A SILVERFISH EARLIER TODAY AND IT TURNS OUT THAT SILVERFISH DO *NOT* TASTE LIKE CHICKEN
deuce
#chicken
#deuce-solo
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#sfw
#silverfish
#taste
#tastes-like-chicken
5,584 5/13/2014 sad ness
deuce: SADNESS IS ALL THERE IS deuce: IT'S SADNESS TURTLES ALL THE WAY DOWN
deuce
#deuce-solo
#sad-deuce
#sadness-turtles
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#woodring-field-background
5,585 5/14/2014 this bag and this rag
pants: HUFF FROM THIS BAG spigot: HOW MANY GOSH DARN pants: AND THIS RAG spigot: HANG ON pants: HELLO spigot: WE'RE DOIN' ALL WE CAN
pants
spigot
#cake-mix
#huffing
#irc
#pants-spigot
#phalus700
#scottish-accent
#solvents
#substance-abuse
#urine
#woodring-field-background
5,586 5/16/2014 tough times for trolley
pants: GARK GARK GARK WENT THE TROLLY pants: TOUGH TIMES FOR TROLLY
pants
#gark
#judy-garland
#meet-me-in-st-louis
#pants-solo
#sfw
#singing
#the-trolley-song
#title-mismatch
#tough-times
#trolley
#trolly
#woodring-room-background
5,587 5/17/2014 john glenn has a huge horse cock
deuce: ASTRONAUTWEINERSIZES.INFO pants: <A HREF="HORSECOCK">JOHN GLENN</A> deuce: <SPAN CLASS="BEDWETTER">ALAN SHEPARD</SPAN>
deuce
pants
#astronaut
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#dns
#html
#nasa
5,588 5/18/2014 blast off to mars
spigot: I WONDER IF I GOT A COLLEGE DEGREE AND ROLLED IT UP INTO A TUBE AND SET IT ON FIRE I COULD BLAST OFF TO MARS!!!!!!!! spigot: OR PUT DOPE IN IT!!!!!!!!
spigot
#college
#dope
#marijuana
#mars
#red-background
#space
#spigot-solo
#stray-dot
5,589 5/19/2014 hot j/o
deuce: OKAY WHO'S UP FOR SOME HOT J/O? spigot: NOT ME (spigot): ME
deuce
spigot
#contradictory
#deuce-spigot
#gay
#hot-jo
#jerk-off
#not-gay
#urinal-background
#whisper
5,590 5/20/2014 they buy and plant
deuce: LET'S YOU AND ME TALK ABOUT A FUCKIN' OSTRICH pants: THEY BITE AND CLAMP
deuce
pants
#birds
#biting
#clamp
#deuce-pants
#ostrich
#siri
#woodring-stairs-background
5,591 5/21/2014 that's fair
spigot: OH I UNDERSTAND spigot: FOR EVERY ONE THAT GOES IN MY MOUTH spigot: I GET TWO POKED UP MY BIG FAT ASS spigot: THAT'S FAIR
spigot
#font
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#mouth
#spigot-solo
5,592 5/22/2014 and so it goes
deuce: BHABHLBALHAB spigot: ANOTHER DAY
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#white-background
5,593 5/23/2014 q.e.d.
deuce: IF A SHEMALE IS FUCKING A WOMAN THEN IT'S COMPLETELY STRAIGHT deuce: THIS IS PROVEN BY THE FACT THAT THERE IS ONE (1) MALE AND ONE (1) FEMALE deuce: QED deuce: I'M NOT GAY
deuce
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#hospital-background
#not-gay
#shemales
#somber-deuce
#the-locomotion
#tranny
#ts
5,594 5/24/2014 among other things
pants: IF I CHOP OFF MY OWN DICK AND EAT IT AM I CANNIBAL
pants
#bobbitt
#cannibalism
#coy-pants
#genital-mutilation
#orange-background
#pants-solo
#self-harm
5,595 5/25/2014 filled to the brim
spigot: I'M FILLED TO THE BRIM WITH THE RICHNESS OF LIQUOR spigot: I'M THE LIFE OF THE PARTY spigot: WOOO HOOOO HEY EVERYONE I SHAVED MY BALLS TODAY
spigot
#alcohol
#balls
#drugs
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#party
#shave
#shaving
#spigot-solo
5,596 5/26/2014 god is real
deuce: GOD IS REAL deuce: SORRY WAIT deuce: GOD IS REAL-ISH
deuce
#blue-background
#deuce-solo
#god
5,597 5/27/2014 get your head out of my lap
pants: ROBOT + COP = ???? spigot: GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF MY LAP
pants
spigot
#comprehensively-tagged
#cop
#dial-9
#head
#head-out-of-my-lap
#lap
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#pants-spigot
#robocop
#robot
#sfw
5,598 5/28/2014 is this
pants: IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING pants: OH HI deuce: HLLHGAHLAGHLGA
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
5,599 5/29/2014 every fucking morning
spigot: WHY DOES MY HEAD HURT EVERY FUCKING MORNING deuce: I STILL HAVEN'T QUITE FIGURED IT OUT deuce: I'M NOT VERY BRIGHT AFTER ALL deuce: TELEPHONY
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#mustard
#somber-deuce
#yellow-background
5,600 5/30/2014 bring our girls home
deuce: #BRINGOURGIRLSHOME deuce: #ITGETSBETTER deuce: #NEVERMINDTHEYREPROBABLYFINETHERE deuce: #WHATSONTV
deuce
#current-events
#deuce-solo
#grey-background
#sfw
#twitter
5,601 5/31/2014 is this my life
: Shortcut to CChat : All Programs &#8688; : My Documents : My Recent Documents : My Pictures : My Music : My Computer : Control Panel : Set Program Access and Defaults : Printers and Faxes : Help and Support : Search : Run pants: DONGS spigot: ONGS spigot: MY LIFE pants: DONGS
pants
spigot
#behind-the-scenes
#blue-background
#deja-vu
#dongs
#existential
#pants-spigot
#windows
5,602 6/1/2014 can i go now
deuce: CAN I GO NOW pants: NO deuce: FINE deuce: (FROWNS, FOLDS ARMS)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
5,603 6/2/2014 like a christmas tree
spigot: WHO'S THAT FASTENING A GIRAFFE TO THE TOP OF HIS BMW LIKE A CHRISTMAS TREE spigot: X-FILES FLASHLIGHTS spigot: HE'S GETTING AWA HE CRASHED
spigot
#bmw
#christmas
#giraffe
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#svetlana
#woodring-room-background
#x-files
5,604 6/3/2014 i can totally tell
dick: ANYBODY WANT TO GO TO A MENSA MEETING WITH ME TONIGHT? pants: I'M NOT SMART ENOUGH pants: PLUS I'M GOING TO BE ON THE TOILET ALL NIGHT pants: I CAN TELL
dick
pants
#dick-pants
#mensa
#woodring-field-background
5,605 6/4/2014 can't see gifs or jpegs
pants: I CAN'T SEE GIFS OR JPEGS spigot: REBOOT YOUR BROWSER !!!!! pants: MY SCREEN IS GAY AND DUMB spigot: REBOOT YOUR ROUTER !!!!!! pants: IT'S BLINKING AND SPLURTING spigot: REBOOT YOUR MACHINE !!!!! pants: IT'S SPLURKING AND SPLORKING spigot: REBOOT YOUR CAR AND DRIVE AWAY !!!! pants: I JUST PLOWED THROUGH NINE DAY CARES spigot: REBOOT YOUR LIFE USING A FAKE NAME !!!! pants: WHAT ABOUT MY FREQUENT FLYER MILES ??? pants: AND MY SAFEWAY REWARDS CARDS ??? pants: AND MY ANYTIME MINUTES ?????? pants: AND MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY PLUS POINTS ????? spigot: OKAY BYE
pants
spigot
#coy-pants
#huffy-pants
#overlong
#pants-spigot
#safeway
#woodring-field-background
5,606 6/5/2014 space dicks
spigot: I WONDER IF YOU HAVE EVER SUCKED A DICK IN SPACE spigot: (OR AS I LIKE TO CALL THEM, SPACE DICKS)
spigot
#reddit
#space
#space-dicks
#spigot-solo
5,607 6/6/2014 if anybody can hear me
spigot: IF ANYONE CAN HEAR ME SHOUTING I'M VERY MUCH ON FIRE!!!!!!
spigot
#bonequest-hd
#hi-fi
#sfw
#spigot-solo
5,608 6/7/2014 incest and drubbing
pants: T SPIGOT WOULD YOU LIKE TO HEAR MY TALE OF INCEST AND DRUBBING AS A TEENAGE GIRL spigot: I DON'T KNOW WHAT DRUBBING IS BUT IF IT'S ANYTHING LIKE MACARONI AND CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pants
spigot
#deja-vu
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
5,609 6/8/2014 put in the mouth
deuce: NO JUST MUWAAAAHH GOODBYE FUCKING WORLD (PUT IN CHAMBER, HIT SLIDE RELEASE, PUT IN THE MOUTH, BLAM) pants: MMMMMMMMM <-- ALL I CAN TYPE NOW
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#mmm
#suicide
#teal-background
5,610 6/9/2014 the reason the sky looks blue
spigot: FOLKS THE REASON THERE ARE SO MANY MORE MEN THAN WOMEN IN COMPUTER SCIENCE IS BECAUSE IT'S NOT OUR RESPONSIBILITY TO RECTIFY THE IMBALANCE. spigot: FOLKS THE REASON THE SKY LOOKS BLUE IS BECAUSE DUST IN THE ATMOSPHERE CHOPS UP LIGHT FROM THE SUN INTO TINY WAVELENGTHS WHICH OUR EYES DETECT AS BLUE. spigot: FOLKS MIKE'S HARD LEMONADE JUST ISN'T DOING IT FOR ME THIS MORNING pants: HAVE YOU CONSIDERED A WINE COOLER OR MAYBE A GLASS OF WATER
pants
spigot
#alcohol
#computer-science
#folks
#pants-spigot
#rayleigh-scattering
#science
#sfw
#weird-pants-face
#wine-cooler
#woodring-field-background
5,611 6/10/2014 is this my life
pants: DONGS spigot: DONGS pants: DONGS spigot: DONGS spigot: IS THIS MY LIFE pants: DONGS
pants
spigot
#blue-background
#deja-vu
#existential
#fired
#huffy-pants
#pants-spigot
5,612 6/11/2014 parade magazine
spigot: HI I'M MARILYN VOS SAVANT, PERHAPS YOU'VE SEEN ME SUCKING DICK IN "PARADE" spigot: I'M THE WORLD'S MOST BRILLIANT WOMAN AND I CAN'T STOP WITH THE JIZZ ALL OVER THE FACE spigot: PERHAPS YOU'VE SEEN ME NEXT TO BILL HOEST'S "THE LAUGH PARADE"
spigot
#bill-hoest
#marilyn-vos-savant
#parade
#porn
#spigot-solo
5,613 6/12/2014 in my big dumb face
spigot: CHRISTMAS IS COMING / THE GOOSE IS GETTING FAT spigot: PLEASE PUSH YOUR BONER / IN MY BIG DUMB FACE hanford: @JERKCITYHIFI CAN WE GET AN API FOR INTEGRATION
hanford
spigot
#api
#christmas
#christmas-carol
#hanford-spigot
#singing
#twitter
5,614 6/13/2014 sans fannypack
pants: SANS FANNYPACK WOULD MAKE A GOOD PORNO NAME FOR ME spigot: OR A QUALITY FONT pants: WHEN IS MY BONER COMING TO BLU-RAY spigot: IT'S spigot: AL / REA / DY / HERE pants: [ORCHESTRA SWELLS]
pants
spigot
#blu-ray
#coy-pants
#fannypack
#font
#orchestra-swells
#pants-spigot
#porn
#sans-fannypack
#singing
5,615 6/14/2014 warm greetings
deuce: HI SPIGOT spigot: {{{{{{{{{{{{ HI }}}}}}}}}}}}
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#green-background
#troll-blowing
5,616 6/15/2014 push technology
pants: THIS DOESN'T FEEL LIKE PUSH TECHNOLOGY pants: IT FEELS MORE LIKE MASH MY FACE INTO THE COLD TILE TECHNOOOOOOOOOOOO pants: TECHNOOOOOOOOOO pants: TECHNOLOGGGGGGG pants: GIVING UP
pants
#pants-solo
#push-technology
#tile-floor
#woodring-den-background
5,617 6/16/2014 pretty sure
spigot: THE WEBSITE AHEAD CONTAINS MALWARE! spigot: PRETTY SURE IT'S A HANDJOB VIDEO
spigot
#handjob
#malware
#porn
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#warning
5,618 6/17/2014 shortbread shitcakes
spigot: WHY CAN'T I SEE ALL THE FOOTAGE FROM WHEN I WOKE UP AFTER 24 HOURS OF SLEEP AND STUMBLED AROUND OPENING AND CLOSING COOKIE DRAWERS deuce: I ALSO WOULD LIKE TO SEE THAT FOOTAGE spigot: WELL THE FOOTAGE IS POINTLESS IF THERE'S NO THIRD ACT spigot: I.E. ACTUALLY FINDING COOKIES INSTEAD OF SHORTBREAD SHITCAKES deuce: THE THIRD ACT IS YOU FURIOUSLY BEATING OFF WHILE LOOKING WITH DEAD EYES DIRECTLY INTO THE CAMERA
deuce
spigot
#bonequest-hd
#cookie-drawer
#cookies
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#masturbation
#mountain-background
5,619 6/18/2014 he's eating othello pieces
pants: AT THIS POINT WE'VE TESTED YOU FOR STRESS AND NOW WE'RE JUST TRYING TO SEE WHAT YOU'LL EAT spigot: (STAGE WHISPERING) HE'S EATING OTHELLO PIECES pants: THE COCONUT ALMOND NUTBUTTERS WERE NOT EVEN OPENED spigot: COCONUT ALMOND NUTBUTTERS READS LIKE STRIKE ONE, STRIKE TWO, STRIKE THREE
pants
spigot
#cookies
#huffy-pants
#orange-background
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#stress-testing
#three-strikes
#whisper
5,620 6/19/2014 please pass all traffic through net control
spigot: DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS spigot: PLEASE PASS ALL TRAFFIC THROUGH NET CONTROL spigot: DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS DICKS
spigot
#blue-background
#dicks
#internet
#routing
#smooth-buddy
#spigot-solo
5,621 6/20/2014 what happens part 1 of 3
spigot: WHAT HAPPENS TO A DICK UNLICKED?!?!?! pants: DOES SUCH A THING EXIST?!?!?!??!?!?!
pants
spigot
#existiential
#grey-background
#huffy-pants
#langston-hughes
#pants-spigot
#series
#single-panel
#unlicked-dicks
5,622 6/21/2014 what happens ii
spigot: WHAT HAPPENS TO A DICK UNLICKED?!?!?! deuce: IT IS A SINGULARITY IN SPACETIME WHERE THE LAWS OF PHYSICS DO NOT APPLY
deuce
spigot
#apple-ii
#deuce-spigot
#grey-background
#langston-hughes
#physics
#series
#unlicked-dicks
5,623 6/22/2014 what happens: the exciting conclusion
spigot: WHAT HAPPENS TO A DICK UNLICKED?!?!?! spigot: DOES IT PUSH AND POKE AND CHOKE AND JOKE spigot: DOES IT WHEEZE AND SNEEZE AND SQUEEZE BENEATH THE AMBER SYCAMORE TREES deuce: *OR DOES IT EXPLODE*
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#explosion
#grey-background
#langston-hughes
#poetry
#rhyming
#sans-fannypack
#series
#unlicked-dicks
5,624 6/23/2014 why is the closed sign up
spigot: KEEP REACHING FOR THAT BIG FAT DICK IN THE SKY spigot: JERKING EXCLUSIVELY BETWEEN THE HOURS OF 4 AND 8 pants: WHY IS THE CLOSED SIGN UP THEN spigot: T PANTS FAIRLY CONFIDENT IT'S NONE OF YOUR BEESWAX
pants
spigot
#4-and-8
#bees-wax
#big-fat-dick
#big-fat-dick-in-the-sky
#c
#closed-sign
#deja-vu
#dick
#dick-in-the-sky
#exclusively-between-the-hours-of-4-and-8
#green-background
#hours-of-4-and-8
#jerking-exclusively-between-the-hours-of-4-and-8
#pants-spigot
#programming
5,625 6/24/2014 we're going to have to beat that bear off
deuce: WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO BEAT THAT BEAR OFF pants: BUT HOW deuce: BETTER SAFE THAN SORRY IS MY MOTTO deuce: WHO AM I KIDDING MY ONLY MOTTO IS "WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO BEAT THAT BEAR OFF"
deuce
pants
#bear
#deuce-pants
#white-background
5,626 6/25/2014 hazelnut torte
spigot: HAZELNUT TORTE spigot: I WOULD LIKE YOU TO EXPLAIN THE JOKE TO ME WHILE I BEAT OFF WITH MY ATM CARD spigot: WE NEED SOME GOLD BOND MEDICATED POWDER OVER HERE
spigot
#atm-card
#beating-off
#donut
#gold-bond
#pastry
#spigot-solo
#yellow-background
5,627 6/26/2014 fuel for space monsters
pants: CAN'T WE JUST SEND THE POO INTO SPACE deuce: NO THERE ARE MONSTERS UP THERE deuce: THEY EAT POO FOR FUEL SO WE'LL ONLY BE SOWING THE SEEDS OF OUR OWN DESTRUCTION pants: SPACE MONSTERS???? OR ARE WE AT SEA AND I SHOULD POO OVER THE BOW (STARBOARD SIDE)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#html
#poo
#red-background
#science-fiction
#weird-pants-face
5,628 6/27/2014 who fucking cares
deuce: I MEAN WHO FUCKING CARES spigot: (RAISES HAND) I DON'T spigot: LOWERS HAND, RAISES HAND (WHICH HAND FOR DON'T CARE IF YOU ASKED WHO CARES) deuce: YOU'RE BOTH RIGHT (NOT EVEN PAYING ATTENTION TO HOW MANY HANDS WENT UP ON WHICH QUESTION)
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
5,629 6/28/2014 down time
spigot: HUHHHHH I HELD MY BREATH THE WHOLE TIME JERKCITY WAS DOWN
spigot
#breath
#downtime
#grey-background
#hhhhh
#meta
#spigot-solo
#troll
#troll-blowing
5,630 6/29/2014 trigger warning
pants: ARE YOU A WIENER DOG pants: ARE YOU pants: TRIGGER WARNING: FOG HORNS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#irc
#sfw
#toilet
#wienerdog
#woodring-field-background
5,631 6/30/2014 are you
pants: THAT'S NICE BUT (CLEARS THROAT) (WON'T MAKE EYE CONTACT) (MUMBLES) ARE YOU A WIENER DOG deuce: NO deuce: NO I AM NOT
pants
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#typo
#wienerdog
#woodring-field-background
5,632 7/1/2014 bail fund
effigy: T DEUCE IS THERE THAT MUCH CASH IN THE BAIL FUND??? deuce: WHAT'S THE CHARGE effigy: THE CHARGE WAS BAD MONKEY effigy: X15 effigy: SO, 15 COUNTS deuce: ALSO I DON'T GIVE A SHIT
deuce
effigy
#bad-monkey
#bonequest-hd
#deuce-effigy
#uncredited-character
#woodring-field-background
5,633 7/2/2014 turn around and i'll unzip ya
pants: ANYWAY I'LL BET $1 YOU CAN'T BEAT ME OFF pants: I WISH MY NAME WERE HAMISH pants: C'MON pants: TURN AROUND AND I'LL UNZIP YA pants: WHO WANTS TO HELP ME WASH MY HOODIES
pants
#beating-off
#bonequest-hd
#hoodie
#huffy-pants
#laundry
#pants-solo
#saturday
#urinal-background
5,634 7/3/2014 not on my watch
effigy: COMMAND-OPTION : REBUILDS THE DESKTOP spigot: NOT ON MY WATCH (SPLURK, SPLORT)
effigy
spigot
#effigy-spigot
#macintosh
#mountain-background
#uncredited-character
5,635 7/4/2014 wet cement
spigot: POURING WET CEMENT THROUGH THE SKYLIGHT OF THE HAM SHACK
spigot
#cement
#ham-radio
#lafinjack
#radio
#spigot-solo
#wet-cement
5,636 7/5/2014 dignity and respuhhhhh
spigot: I WOULD JUST LIKE TO BE TREATED WITH DIGNITY AND RESPUHHHHH
spigot
#dignity
#irc
#schlep
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#svetlana
#teal-background
5,637 7/6/2014 pull yourself to safety
pants: HERE pants: TAKE MY TONGUE pants: PULL YOURSELF TO SAFETTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#tongue
#urinal-background
5,638 7/7/2014 read a book or something
pants: WOULD YOU MIND IF I BEAT OFF IN YOUR FACE AND, WHILE I DO SO, PRETEND LIKE YOU'RE BORED pants: THAT'S MY FETISH pants: READ A BOOK OR SOMETHING deuce: NO SCREAMING OR CALLING THE POLICE PLEASE
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#bored
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fetish
#police
#urinal-background
#wienerdogs
5,639 7/8/2014 fluffy mashed nuts
spigot: "SLOBBERING AND CRUNCHING LOUDLY" spigot: BOSTON BAKED COCKS AND FLUFFY MASHED NUTS
spigot
#boston
#cocks
#deja-vu
#nuts
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,640 7/9/2014 let's play unix
pants: LET'S PLAY UNIX pants: I WILL BE GREP deuce: I WILL BE AWK
deuce
pants
#awk
#deuce-pants
#grep
#macintosh
#sfw
#unix
#urinal-background
5,641 7/10/2014 a heavy grift
pants: IT'S A HEAVY GRIFT pants: HOW TO GET HOLD OF THAT DICK pants: THIS WILL REQUIRE A CLEVER PLAN
pants
#dick
#grift
#pants-solo
#planning
#scam
#urinal-background
5,642 7/11/2014 could you please not
pants: BUT IF YOU ENJOYED THE SHOW, PLEASE MAKE A DONATION pants: BUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH pants: WORD UP spigot: COULD YOU PLEASE NOT STARE AT ME WHILE I JERK THANKS
pants
#buh
#pants-spigot
5,643 7/12/2014 caught you
spigot: X spigot: HI deuce: CAUGHT YOU spigot: X MARKS THE BALLS
deuce
spigot
#balls
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#urinal-background
5,644 7/13/2014 yeah that's it thanks
deuce: I'M PRO-ABORTION deuce: UH deuce: MAKE THAT PRO-ABOLITION deuce: OKAY BACK UP I'M CONFUSED NOW pants: T DEUCE ARSONISTS? ?? ? ? deuce: T PANTS YEAH THAT'S IT THANKS
deuce
pants
#abolition
#abortion
#arson
#deuce-pants
#urinal-background
5,645 7/14/2014 netcode
deuce: NO CARL GUSTAV AGAINST INFANTRY
deuce
#battlefield
#bf4
#deuce-solo
#urinal-background
5,646 7/15/2014 tastes nothing like anything
deuce: OKAY HOW COME THE GUACAMOLE DIP I GOT TASTES NOTHING LIKE ANYTHING REMOTELY GUACAMOLISH pants: UH
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hd
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#guacamole
#pills
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,647 7/16/2014 the diabetes problem
deuce: T EFFIGY HAS THE DIABETES PROBLEM CLEARED UP YET spigot: AND I WOULD HAVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH IT TOO IF IT WEREN'T FOR THAT MEDDLING VAMPYRE
deuce
effigy
spigot
#deuce-effigy-spigot
#diabetes
#sfw
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
#vampyre
#viscera
5,648 7/17/2014 blowing and tweeting
spigot: I HAVE BEEN BLOWING AND TWEETING MY GAY RAVE WHISTLE FROM STALL 2 FOR NEARLY THIRTY MINUTES pants: WE COULD HEAR YOU ALL THE WAY OVER BY THE VOLLEYBALL AND TENNIS COURTS
pants
spigot
#gravity
#pants-spigot
#rave
#sfw
#urinal-background
#whistle
5,649 7/18/2014 what is the sound
spigot: SERIOUSLY, WHAT IS THE SOUND OF ONE DICK LICKING pants: [B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B[B
pants
spigot
#dick
#dicklicking
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
#vt100
#zen
5,650 7/19/2014 this place is a dump
spigot: THIS PLACE IS A DUMP spigot: I'D BETTER HANG UP ONE OF MY FLAGS spigot: NOW THAT REALLY GAYS THE PLACE UP
spigot
#flags
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,651 7/20/2014 where is the love
pants: WHERE IS THE LOVE deuce: CERTAINLY NOT HERE pants: I THINK IT MIGHT BE HERE!!!! LOOKING UNDER SEAT CUSHIONS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#love
#sfw
#woodring-room-background
5,652 7/21/2014 a picture of my breakfast
spigot: I UPLOADED A PICTURE OF MY BREAKFAST pants: CAN I SEE???? spigot: (VOMITS)
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#woodring-field-background
5,653 7/22/2014 attention everybody
deuce: ATTENTION deuce: MY BALLS deuce: THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION
deuce
#announcement
#balls
#deuce-solo
#deuces-balls
#mousehole
#woodring-room-background
5,654 7/23/2014 is this heaven
pants: IS THIS HEAVEN pants: AHEM pants: FEELS LIKE HEAVEN pants: NO THIS IS THE BATHROOM pants: YES GET IT ALL OUT pants: LAUGH IT UP YOU BUMS pants: HEY I WAS WILLING TO BE A URINAL BUT NOT A TOILET pants: YOU PEOPLE ARE THE WORST
pants
#heaven
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#ponk
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
5,655 7/24/2014 chopping up coke snorting it up
spigot: CHOPPING UP COKE WITH MY LUCKY REWARDS CARD AND SNORTING IT UP WITH MY BONUS FAMILY MINUTES
spigot
#bonus
#cocaine
#drugs
#lucky-rewards-card
#mountain-background
#spigot-solo
5,656 7/25/2014 upside-down tron cycle
spigot: O_O MY UPSIDE-DOWN TRONCYCLE deuce: DOES IT KNOW HOW TO SPEAK ESPERANTO deuce: AND IF NOT THEN WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY FRENCH FRIES
deuce
spigot
#ascii-art
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#esperanto
#fries
#grey-background
#tron
5,657 7/26/2014 what is he watching
deuce: T PANTS THE EVIL COMPUTER JUST TURNED THE OLD WOMAN INTO AN EVIL ROBOT pants: T DEUCE BY TOUCHING HER OR USING SPACE RAYS pants: T DEUCE I PREFER THE SPACE RAYS METHOD pants: T DEUCE THE OTHER ONE GETS YOU TIME IN LOCKUP (OR LOCKDOWN, YOUR CHOICE) deuce: T PANTS AT THE VERY LEAST IT GETS YOU SMEARED WITH POO THAT'S FOR SURE
deuce
pants
#comprehensively-tagged
#computer
#coy-pants
#dc-comics
#deuce-pants
#evil
#evil-computer
#evil-robot
#excessive-tags
#for-sure
#lockdown
#lockup
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#poo
#robot
#smear
#space-rays
#superman
#too-many-tags
#weird-pants-face
5,658 7/27/2014 beat it
deuce: IS IT NORMAL TO WAKE UP SINGING "BEAT IT" LIKE A CHICKEN deuce: BUK BUK BUK BUKBUK BUK BUK BUK BUK deuce: BUK BUK BUK BUKBUK BUK BUK BUK BUK / BUK BUKBUK deuce: BUK BUKBUK
deuce
#beat-it
#chicken
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#michael-jackson
#sfw
#singing
5,659 7/28/2014 if you can hear me
spigot: T PANTS BLINK IF YOU CAN HEAR ME spigot: PULL MY DICK ONCE FOR YES AND FOUR HUNDRED TIMES FOR NO spigot: ARE YOU GAY pants: SURE
pants
spigot
#dick-pulling
#gay
#grey-background
#nonverbal-communication
#pants-spigot
5,660 7/29/2014 init: single user mode
ozone: INIT: SINGLE USER MODE ozone: THE SYSTEM IS BEING SHUT DOWN NOW ! ! ! .(deuce): WONDERING IF I SHOULD JERK OFF NOW OR WAIT UNTIL LATER
deuce
ozone
#deuce-ozone
#drunk-deuce
#shutdown
#shutdown-now
#single-user-mode
#system
#unix
#yellow-background
5,661 7/30/2014 shitty writers filling copy with standard tropes
deuce: THERE ARE NEARLY AS MANY SHITTY WRITERS FILLING COPY WITH STANDARD TROPES AS THERE ARE SHITTY WRITERS deuce: SPOILERS !!!!! DIARRHEA !!!!!!!!!! PLONK !!!!!!!!!!
deuce
#deuce-solo
#diarrhea
#plonk
#spoilers
#teal-background
#tropes
5,662 7/31/2014 something happened
pants: GOT STUCK IN A HOLE pants: SOMETHING HAPPENED, I FELL DOWN OR SOMETHING pants: DIZZY
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dizzy
#hole
#hole-problems
#injury
#pants-solo
#sfw
#teal-background
5,663 8/1/2014 what's the deal here
.(spigot): FIVE SHAMROCK SHAKES A DAY AND I'M STILL A BLIMP WHAT'S THE DEAL HERE
spigot
#fatness
#mcdonalds
#sfw
#shamrock-shakes
#spigot-solo
#yellow-background
5,664 8/2/2014 one too many
deuce: I THINK I HAVE ONE TOO MANY XTERMS OPEN deuce: BETTER JERK spigot: REBOOTING WITHOUT EXTENSIONS
deuce
spigot
#apple
#deuce-spigot
#doop
#macintosh
#perl
#unix
#woodring-room-background
5,665 8/3/2014 in such a way
spigot: YOU ARE SERIOUSLY CHOKING MY FACE WITH YOUR DONG IN SUCH A WAY THAT I MIGHT BE FORCED TO LOG OFF
spigot
#dong
#face
#spigot-solo
#unix
#woodring-stairs-background
5,666 8/4/2014 brown & sticky
net: WHAT'S BROWN AND STICKY? spigot: YOUR JOKE BOOK???????????????????
net
spigot
#brown-and-sticky
#green-background
#joke-book
#net-spigot
#ponk
5,667 8/5/2014 my new big red truck
deuce: QUIGLEY DOWN UNDER pants: MY NEW BIG RED TRUCK THAT NEEDS SOME REAR END WORK spigot: I SAY IF IT'S EVEN REMOTELY OR SLIGHTLY BROWN, FLUSH IT DOWN
deuce
pants
spigot
#big-red-truck
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants-spigot
#jerry-brown
#light-blue-background
#poo
5,668 8/6/2014 which is a security issue
pants: DO YOU HAVE THE PASSWORD FOR MY MOUTH deuce: I THINK IT'S "DICK" ("COCK" IS ALSO ACCEPTED WHICH IS A SECURITY ISSUE)
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#mouth
#mouth-of-pants
#password
#security
5,669 8/7/2014 galaga
pants: /O\ /O\ pants: \O/ /O\ pants: /OO\ deuce: FOR CHRIST'S SAKE WHERE'S THE FIRE BUTTON
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#galaga
#new-background
#nsfw
#uncategorized-background
#video-games
#videogame
#weird-pants-face
5,670 8/8/2014 give me back my purse
deuce: GIVE ME BACK MY GODDAMN PURSE I'M GETTING ANGRY NOW pants: THANK YOU pants: OWWWWWWWWWWWW deuce: I WOULD PREFER YOU RETURNING MY UNDERWEAR, AS WELL pants: MY FACE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
5,671 8/9/2014 medical advice
ozone: LD32: FATAL 12: EXPECTING N32 OBJECTS: /LIB/LIBC.SO.1 IS O32. effigy: I REALLY NEED MEIDCAL ADVICE deuce: YOU SHOULD RUB DIRT IN IT
deuce
effigy
ozone
#deuce-effigy-ozone
#dirt
#first-aid
#medical-advice
#unix
#woodring-field-background
5,672 8/10/2014 so it's a yes
deuce: I'M NOT HEARING A YES ????? SO IT'S A YES deuce: SLAMS GAVEL DOWN deuce: HOLY JESUS JUST SAY YES (COCKS GUN)
deuce
#deuce-solo
#gun
#jesus
#woodring-field-background
5,673 8/11/2014 two gay vampires
spigot: TWO GAY VAMPIRES FLAP INTO A BAR spigot: FIRST ONE SAYS "BARTENDER GIVE ME YOUR FATTEST GAYEST DRINK EVER" spigot: BARTENDER SAYS "WHAT'LL YOUR FAT FRIEND HAVE" spigot: AND THE SECOND ONE'S ALL "CALL THE ENCLAVE" (spigot): SEE TOGETHER THEY'RE BOTH FAGS, ONE OF WHICH RUNS A BBS
spigot
#bbs
#enclave
#fat
#flap
#flappity-bats
#spigot-solo
#vampire
#viscera
#whisper
#woodring-field-background
5,674 8/12/2014 the god of hellfire
pants: I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE pants: AND I BRING YOU pants: DICK deuce: YOU ARE THE CRAPPIEST HELLFIRE GOD ON RECORD
deuce
pants
#arthur-brown
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dick
#drunk-deuce
#hellfire
#white-background
5,675 8/13/2014 milfs, cougars and grandmas
deuce: MILFS, COUGARS, AND GRANDMAS NO. 2 deuce: I DON'T LIKE THE USE OF THAT CONJUNCTION spigot: HOW ABOUT WE THROW A 'NEITHER' IN FRONT AND A 'NOR' INSTEAD OF 'AND', THEN SHIP IT
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#deucegrin
#grammar
#milf
#porn
#white-background
5,676 8/14/2014 wide mouth contest
pants
unspecified woman
#contest
#mouth
#mouth-of-pants
#no-dialog
#pants-solo
#sfw
#uncredited-character
#white-background
#wide
#wide-mouth
5,677 8/15/2014 from now on
pants: LAST NIGHT WE AGREED NOT TO BE GAY FROM NOW ON AND YOU BLEW IT MISTER pants: WE AGREED pants: AND NOW I HAVE TO DESTROY YOU (SLOWLY PUTTING LID ONTO JAR, CRYING, SINGING NATIONAL ANTHEM TO DISTRACT MYSELF)
deuce
pants
#destruction
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#dry-cleaners
#gay
#huffy-pants
#national-anthem
#violence
#woodring-stairs-background
5,678 8/16/2014 a midsummers nights dream act 3 scene 1 part 2
ozone: BY'R LAKIN, A PARLOUS FEAR. net: WELL, WE WILL HAVE SUCH A PROLOGUE; AND IT SHALL BE WRITTEN IN EIGHT AND SIX atandt: NOT A WHIT: I HAVE A DEVICE TO MAKE ALL WELL. WRITE ME A PROLOGUE; AND LET THE PROLOGUE SEEM TO SAY, WE WILL DO NO HARM WITH OUR SWORDS, AND THAT PYRAMUS IS NOT KILLED INDEED; atandt: AND, FOR THE MORE BETTER ASSURANCE, TELL THEM THAT I, PYRAMUS, AM NOT PYRAMUS, BUT BOTTOM THE WEAVER: THIS WILL PUT THEM OUT OF FEAR.
atandt
net
ozone
#atandt-net-ozone
#midsummers-nights-dream
#shakespeare
#urinal-background
5,679 8/17/2014 pants from jerkcity annual
pants: I CAN'T FIT MY OWN DICK IN MY OWN-- pants: NEVER MIND pants: NEVER pants: YOU pants: MIND
pants
#auto-erotic
#birthday-strip
#huffy-pants
#masturbation
#pants-solo
#self-fuck
#woodring-room-background
5,680 8/18/2014 rapekits
spigot: IN MY DAY, RAPE KITS WERE NOTHING BUT DUCT TAPE AND GARBAGE BAGS!!! spigot: NOW THEY'RE USED IN "HOSPITALS" TO ANALYZE "EVIDENCE" spigot: IT'S JUST WAY LESS ROMANTIC
spigot
#rape
#rapekit
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,681 8/19/2014 feline aids
spigot: FOLKS A CAT WALKED ON MY PILLOW AND I THINK I HAVE FELINE AIDS spigot: WELPS!!! OFF TO THE VET spigot: A PLASTIC CONE ON MY DONG LIKE A MEGAPHONE spigot: ECHO ECHO ECHO ECHO
spigot
#aids
#cats
#dongwear
#folks
#mountain-background
#spigot-solo
#veterinary-devices
5,682 8/20/2014 the cloud
pants: FEEDING BANANAS TO MY DICK spigot: STOP MAKING FUN OF THE CLOUD spigot: MY DICK PICS SHOW UP ON ALL HER DEVICES
pants
spigot
#banana
#dick-pics
#pants-spigot
#the-cloud
#woodring-room-background
5,683 8/21/2014 my bear head
: SPIGOT THE BEAR AS A SMOKEY THE BEAR FIGURE DOING LECTURES AT SCHOOLS, NOT A COP DRAMA spigot: ZIPPING UP MY BEAR SUIT!! spigot: FASTENING MY BEAR HEAD!! spigot: PARTING THE CURTAINS AND STROLLING ON STAGE!!! spigot: NO IDEA WHAT NEXT, OVERALL CONSENSUS IS: THIS GAG HAS NO LEGS, NEEDS WORK
spigot
#empty-auditorium-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#spigot-the-bear
5,684 8/22/2014 i don't mind
spigot: I'M NOT HOMOPHOBIC I DON'T MIND FIGHTING GAY GUYS
spigot
#spigot-solo
5,685 8/23/2014 victims of sexual assault
effigy: ZOLPIDEM HAS BEEN USED ON VICTIMS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT.[59][60] pants: BUT IN FAIRNESS SO HAS MY DONG
effigy
pants
#ambien
#bonghit
#coy-pants
#dong
#effigy-pants
#orange-background
#rape
#vicodin
#wikipedia
5,686 8/24/2014 note the horizon where sand meets sky
spigot: WHO WANTS TO SEE MY BURNING MAN PICS?????????? spigot: HERE'S SOME SAND spigot: AGAIN SAND WITH A LITTLE SKY pants: WHAT'S THAT (POINTING) spigot: A WEIRD THING SOMEONE BUILT (YOU CAN SEE THE SAND IN THE BACKGROUND) spigot: MY TENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: NOTE THE HORIZON OF WHERE SAND MEETS SKY spigot: LET'S JUST SAY I'M A MAJOR PLAYA ON THE PLAYA spigot: OKAY THESE ARE PICTURES I GOOGLED
pants
spigot
#burning-man
#fraud
#google
#moon-background
#pants-spigot
#sand
#weird-pants-face
5,687 8/25/2014 mouth love, space bongs
spigot: MOUTH LOVE deuce: ZOING pants: SPACE BONGS
deuce
pants
spigot
#bong
#deuce-pants-spigot
#mouth
#neon-grid-background
#stray-dot
5,688 8/26/2014 earning it
pants: COME ON pants: PLEASE GIVE ME A NICKEL deuce: YOU WILL GET A WOODEN NICKEL AND A PUNCH TO THE CHOPS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#nickel
#wooden-nickel
5,689 8/27/2014 i'm going to pop a serious boner
pants: HURP spigot: I SWEAR I'M GOING TO POP A SERIOUS BONER IF I EAT ANOTHER EGG MCMUFFIN
pants
spigot
#apple
#apple-ii
#egg-mcmuffin
#mcdonalds
#pants-spigot
5,690 8/28/2014 one more day
deuce: TODAY I MANAGED TO STAVE OFF SUICIDE FOR ONE MORE DAY
deuce
#deuce-solo
#sad-deuce
#suicide
#white-background
5,691 8/29/2014 punchable
pants: DOES MY FACE LOOK PUNCHABLE deuce: DEPENDS pants: BE HONEST deuce: IF YOU MEAN DOES IT IMPLEMENT THE PUNCHABLE INTERFACE, THE ANSWER IS YES deuce: IF YOU MEAN DOES IT INVITE OR ENCOURAGE A PUNCH MORE THAN OTHER SUCH FACES, THE ANSWER IS NO pants: WHAT CAN I DO TO CHANGE THAT deuce: T PANTS INCREASE THE PUNCHABILITY ATTRIBUTE deuce: OBJECT 'PANTS\' FACE' IMPLEMENTS PUNCHABLE {PUNCHABILITY: 100; }
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#face-punching
#object-oriented-programming
#unspecified-object-description-language
5,692 8/30/2014 a lot more comfortable
spigot: MY VOICE IS CHANGING PEOPLE BUT I'M STILL GAY spigot: COCKS AND NUTS PRODDING ME THROUGH ADOLESCENCE deuce: I'D FEEL A LOT MORE COMFORTABLE ABOUT BEING HERE IF YOU GUYS WERE FUNNIER
deuce
spigot
#adolescence
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#neon-grid-background
#puberty
#url
5,693 8/31/2014 g.b. s.p.
deuce: GAY BUTT SEX PARTY
deuce
#dude
#gay-butt-sex-party
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
5,694 9/1/2014 into everything somehow
spigot: LOOKING TO WEDGE AGILE ANAL AND EXTREME ANAL PROGRAMMING INTO ONE LINE deuce: T SPIGOT CAN'T WE WORK ANAL TEST DRIVEN DEVELOPMENT INTO EVERYTHING SOMEHOW
deuce
spigot
#agile-programming
#anal
#deuce-spigot
#gark
#software-development-methodologies
#test-driven-development
5,695 9/2/2014 slam
spigot: I'M LEAVING spigot: FORGOT MY PURSE
spigot
#blank-frame
#purse
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#white-background
5,696 9/3/2014 the wisdom of solomon
pants: SOLOMON SAYS WE SHOULD CUT ALL THE CATS IN HALF AND THEN REATTACH THEM TO MAKE ONE BIG COMPLICATED CAT
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cat
#mountain-background
#pants-solo
#sfw
#solomon
5,697 9/4/2014 the q in q*bert
spigot: COULD YOU PLEASE COME BACK HERE AND HAGGLE OVER MY BALLS FOR HALF AN HOUR deuce: T SPIGOT DON'T FALL FOR IT spigot: T DEUCE YOU PUT THE Q IN Q*BERT
deuce
spigot
#balls
#deuce-spigot
#qbert
#somber-deuce
#woodring-field-background
5,698 9/5/2014 hold still
spigot: ME AGAIN spigot: SOILING MYSELF spigot: ME AGAIN spigot: SOILING MYSELF spigot: ME AGAIN spigot: SOILING MYSELF spigot: ME AGAIN spigot: SOILING MYSELF deuce: FUCKING HOLD STILL
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#hold-still
#me-again
#repetition
#soiling
#soiling-myself
#urinal-background
5,699 9/6/2014 some times
spigot: SOMETIMES I FEEL HAPPY spigot: AND SOMETIMES I FEEL SAD spigot: *HURF* spigot: DAD'S BALLS
spigot
#black-background
#dad
#dads-balls
#deja-vu
#spigot-solo
5,700 9/7/2014 trying to help
SPIGOT: GURGLING PANTS: BURGLING AS WELL I HOPE DEUCE: ALGHALGHALGHALG HALHALGHLAHGLAHGLAHLAGALH (TRYING TO HELP BUT FAILING) PANTS: HULAGHALUGHLUAGH LAHGLHAGLHALGHLAG (APPRECIATING THE EFFORT)
deuce
pants
spigot
#attempt
#cocksucking-noises
#deuce-pants-spigot
#effort
#failure
#gurgling
#help
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#rhyming
5,701 9/8/2014 allergy season
pants: ACHOO pants: I'M ALLERGIC TO NUTS deuce: BOY I'LL SAY
deuce
pants
#allergies
#deuce-pants
#nuts
#woodring-field-background
5,702 9/9/2014 stuck in the muck
pants
#abstract
#hi-fi
#no-dialog
#sfw
5,703 9/10/2014 what does it mean when
deuce: WHAT DOES IT MEAN WHEN A PRETTY GIRL SAYS SHE'S VERSATILE
deuce
#craigslist
#deuce-solo
#personals
#prostitute
#woodring-field-background
5,704 9/11/2014 can't even finish a senten
spigot: IT'S 9/11 ALL OVER AG **KA-BLOOM** spigot: CAN'T EVEN FINISH A SENTEN **KA-BLAM** spigot: MAYBE IF I STAND VERY **KA-BLOOM**
spigot
#9-11
#explosion
#sfw
#spigot-solo
5,705 9/12/2014 long story short
spigot: SO LONG STORY SHORT I'D LIKE TO REDIRECT THE NATURE OF THIS CONVERSATION AND BRING IT ON BACK TO WHY YOU DISCONNECTED MY PHONE AND UTILITIES
spigot
#green-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
5,706 9/13/2014 fight the power
deuce: I'M WITH YOU BROTHER FIGHT THE POWER deuce: T DICK WHAT ARE WE FIGHTING FOR AGAIN
deuce
dick
#deuce-dick
#sfw
#woodring-room-background
5,707 9/14/2014 that's what you get
deuce: THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR EXERCISING YOU DECADENT WESTERNERS
deuce
#deuce-solo
#sfw
5,708 9/15/2014 monster manual
pants: T DEUCE I CAN'T FIND CCH POUNDER IN THE MONSTER MANUAL??? deuce: THAT IS JUST A WEIRD THING TO SAY pants: PLEASE BUY MY LINGERIE CALENDAR
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dungeons-and-dragons
#stray-dot
5,709 9/16/2014 yes hello
spigot: WE'RE GOING HOPPIN' spigot: WE'RE GOING HOPPIN' TODAY spigot: WE'RE GOIN' BOPPIN' spigot: I SAID WE'RE FUCKING GOING BOPPING PEOPLE DON'T JUST FUCKING STAND THERE spigot: AM I THE ONLY QUEER IN THIS BAR JESUS H. CHRIST : SPIGOT HOPS A TRAIN TO QUEER TOWN : SPIGOT HOPS OFF THE QUEER BUS spigot: YES HELLO
spigot
#american-bandstand
#bus
#grey-background
#queer-bus
#queer-town
#singing
#spigot-solo
5,710 9/17/2014 here's what i want you to do
pants: SIT AROUND AND BE QUIET pants: UNTIL HOMICIDE SHOWS UP pants: THEN TALK YOUR FOOL HEAD OFF
pants
#pants-solo
#sfw
5,711 9/18/2014 yes and no
deuce: ARE YOU GAY spigot: YES AND NO deuce: IN WHAT WAY spigot: YES I'M GAY AND NO I DON'T HAVE CHANGE deuce: HOW ABOUT BUS FARE spigot: I SHOULDN'T EVEN BE TALKING TO YOU
deuce
spigot
#bus-fare
#change
#deja-vu
#deuce-spigot
#white-background
5,712 9/19/2014 does this have anything
deuce: DOES THIS HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH ME GETTING A BONER spigot: COLLEGE
deuce
spigot
#boner
#college
#deuce-spigot
#yellow-background
5,713 9/20/2014 please get back to me about this
pants: T DEUCE WOULD YOU PLEASE GRADE MY PAPER deuce: E- pants: T DEUCE WHAT ABOUT MY CITIZENSHIP AND ABILITY TO STUFF MORE PRICKS IN MY MOUTH THAN THE KING OF SIAM deuce: T PANTS I WILL HAVE TO CHECK UP ON THAT ONE pants: T DEUCE PLEASE GET BACK TO ME ABOUT THIS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#pricks
#school
#woodring-stairs-background
5,714 9/21/2014 a good boy
pants: WHO'S A GOOD BOY deuce: I AM I AM pants: YOU'RE A GOOD BOY deuce: SPLATTER ME WITH BLOOD AND PISS pants: YES YOU ARE
deuce
pants
#blood
#deuce-pants
#deucegrin
#piss
#woodring-stairs-background
5,715 9/22/2014 more than
deuce: WHO LOVES DICK MORE THAN OUR SURGEON GENERAL deuce: NO IDEA WHY I SAID THAT
deuce
#deuce-solo
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#surgeon-general
#woodring-field-background
5,716 9/23/2014 just you and me
deuce: I THINK JERKCITY IS BEST WHEN IT'S JUST YOU AND ME spigot: AND OUR COCKS
deuce
spigot
#bonequest-hd
#deuce-spigot
#woodring-stairs-background
5,717 9/24/2014 quite civil that way
pants: T DEUCE ALSO: DICKS deuce: HLAGLHAGLHAG deuce: T PANTS WE CAN DO THAT pants: T DEUCE QUITE CIVIL THAT WAY pants: T DEUCE TUT TUT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#mousehole
#woodring-room-background
5,718 9/25/2014 const cock
spigot: CONST COCK spigot: THAT'S SHORT FOR "CONSTANTLY COCK" spigot: I AM FUCKING TALKING TO YOU PEOPLE
spigot
#c
#cock
#programming
#spigot-solo
#teal-background
5,719 9/26/2014 who wants to help me
spigot: WHO WANTS TO HELP ME WRITE A VAMPIRE FONTZINE
spigot
#black-background
#farts
#spigot-solo
#vampire
#viscera
#zine
5,720 9/27/2014 the wrong way round
deuce: OR MAYBE I GOT THAT THE WRONG WAY AROUND spigot: YOU NEED TO BE MORE WELL ROUNDED, WITH EQUAL PORTIONS DICK AND PRICK spigot: SOMETIMES WHEN I WATCH TV I THINK ABOUT KISSING YOU deuce: ROBOTS.TXT IS A FILE THAT WEBCRAWLERS SEARCH FOR spigot: COULD YOU PLEASE TELL ME ONE MORE TIME deuce: ROBOTS.TXT
deuce
spigot
#blue-background
#deuce-spigot
#filename
#robots-txt
5,721 9/28/2014 easy monday
pants: IT'S THAT KINDA DAY pants: WE'LL CALL IT EASY MONDAY pants: ALL TRAFFIC LIGHTS ARE GREEN AND NOBODY HAS URINATNEVER MIND
pants
#monday
#orange-background
#pants-solo
#piss
5,722 9/29/2014 oop
spigot: SEKA AND SULKA ARE NOT THE SAME PEOPLE deuce: MYSELF, I'M CONFUSED REGARDING THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN EBONY AYES AND PURPLE PASSION spigot: I BELIEVE THEY'RE BOTH SUBCLASSED FROM VANESSA DEL RIO deuce: OBJECT-ORIENTED PORN
deuce
spigot
#deja-vu
#deuce-spigot
#object-oriented-porn
#porn
5,723 9/30/2014 just fucking do it
deuce: I WANT YOU TO FUCKING HOLD ME deuce: JUST FUCKING DO IT deuce: YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYES pants: TWITTER TWEETS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#huffy-pants
#twitter
5,724 10/1/2014 tuesday evening
deuce: [CUT TO CLOCK ON THE WALL, HANDS SPINNING LIKE CRAZY] deuce: [CUT TO THE DEUCE IN A PILE OF HIS OWN VOMIT AND PISS, TUESDAY EVENING] deuce: UH WHAT WHERE WHAT DID I MISS deuce: FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST HELP ME I HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM deuce: [CURTAIN]
deuce
#alcohol
#alcoholism
#curtain-drop
#deuce-solo
#hospital-background
#piss
#sad-deuce
#tuesday
#vomit
5,725 10/2/2014 i'm a dinosaur
spigot: I'M A DINOSAUR PEOPLE spigot: RRRRRRRRRRRRRRR spigot: I'M A COCKASAURUS NUTS spigot: I GUESS THAT WAS FUNNIER ON THE CRAPPER
spigot
#dinosaurs
#empty-auditorium-background
#spigot-solo
5,726 10/3/2014 holy shit
spigot: HOLY SHIT spigot: MY DONG JUST WON A TONY AWARD
spigot
#dong
#hi-fi
#spigot-solo
#text-adventure
#tony-award
#urinal-background
5,727 10/4/2014 giving up
spigot: GIVING UP spigot: GIVING UP spigot: REALLY GIVING UP deuce: HOLD ME AND WE SHALL CONSUMMATE OUR RELATIONSHIP
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#repetition
#sfw
5,728 10/5/2014 please wait
:Parallels Tools Installation Agent :Please Wait :Installing Parallels Tools: 19% :||||||| :You will need to Restart Windows to finish the Parallels Tools installation
pants
#behind-the-scenes
#parallels-tools
#sfw
#windows
5,729 10/6/2014 asked to kinda lay off singing
(spigot): OKAY WELL spigot: I WAS JUST ASKED TO KINDA LAY OFF SINGING spigot: LICK DICK / LICK DICK / CHOKIN' ON A PRICK spigot: TO THE COPS THEME spigot: GUESS 45 MINS IS PLENTY
spigot
#cops-theme
#singing
#spigot-solo
#whisper
#woodring-field-background
5,730 10/7/2014 this game of twenty questions
pants: PLANTS pants: ANIMALS pants: MINERALS pants: COCKS deuce: THIS GAME OF 20 QUESTIONS NEEDS SERIOUS MODIFICATION
deuce
pants
#blue-background
#cocks
#deuce-pants
5,731 10/8/2014 banana yogurt
spigot: LET'S CHOKE DOWN THEIR DONGS AND WEAR STUPID EXPENSIVE NORDSTROM CLOTHES AND EAT BANANA YOGURT spigot: WELL I TRIED THERE
spigot
#banana
#bonequest-hi-fi
#nordstrom
#spigot-solo
5,732 10/9/2014 the three steps
BUNG: STEP 1: ADMIT YOU HAVE A PROBLEM BUNG: STEP 2: GO TO THE STORE AND SOLVE STEP 1 DEUCE: GHLGLHGHLGLHG BUNG: STEP 3: WIPE UP THE RESULTS OF STEP 2 DEUCE: GLGLG
bung
deuce
#bung-deuce
#list
5,733 10/10/2014 goooo onnnnn
spigot: I'M THE FRUITLESS SUPER-GENE
spigot
#sfw
#spigot-solo
5,734 10/11/2014 out of memory
spigot: ]BREAK IN 10 spigot: ]LIST spigot: ]10 PRINT "=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=" spigot: ?OUT OF MEMORY
spigot
#basic
#boners
#neon-grid-background
#spigot-solo
5,735 10/12/2014 the jizzy dir
spigot: I CAN'T TALK TO YOU AND LOOK AT THE JIZZY DIR AT THE SAME TIME deuce: T SPIGOT UNDERSTOOD deuce: T SPIGOT OVER AND OUT
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#grey-background
#jizzy-dir
#porn
5,736 10/13/2014 why can't i
spigot: LS -LA deuce: HURRAY spigot: RM -R * spigot: T PANTS WHY CAN'T I ERASE JERKCITY WITH RM -R * deuce: HURRRR
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#hospital-background
#sfw
#unix
5,737 10/14/2014 when life gives you lemons
spigot: WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS!!!!!!!!! spigot: JUST KILL YOURSELF AND FLY AROUND THROUGH SPACE AND PLAY JOKES ON PEOPLE
spigot
#cocktober
#jean-charles
#spigot-solo
#suicide
#woodring-stairs-background
5,738 10/15/2014 points at sky
pants: ALL PRAISE TO ALLAH (POINTS AT SKY) (STARTS FUCKING)
pants
#allah
#bonequest-hd
#islam
#pants-solo
#stray-dot
#woodring-room-background
5,739 10/16/2014 a few of my favorite things
spigot: AND DILDOS AND DUCT TAPE
spigot
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
5,740 10/17/2014 complaint department
pants: IT'S HOT IN HERE ozone: THEN TAKE YOUR HEAD OUT OF IT
ozone
pants
#ozone-pants
#sfw
#urinal-background
5,741 10/18/2014 hammy revisited
pants: HAMMY WANTS TO LEAVE SOMETHING THAT OTHERS WILL REMEMBER HIM BY pants: HAMMY WANTS TO WORK TOWARDS A GOAL THAT IS BIGGER THAN HIMSELF pants: HAMMY WANTS TO PASS KNOWLEDGE AND WISDOM ON TO FUTURE GENERATIONS pants: HAMMY WANTS TO LEAD AND TO INSPIRE AND TO BE PART OF A TEAM pants: HAMMY WANTS TO MAKE THIS WORLD A BETTER PLACE FOR US ALL TO LIVE IN pants: HAMMY WANTS TO LIVE LIFE OUT LOUD, EACH AND EVERY DAY TO THE FULLEST pants: SOMETIMES HAMMY JUST WANTS A HUG AND TO BE HEARD pants: BUT, YES, MOSTLY HAMMY WANTS MCDONALDS
pants
#hammy
#mcdonalds
#pants-solo
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
5,742 10/19/2014 that's what she said
pants: I FELL DOWN THE STAIRS spigot: THAT'S WHAT ***SHE*** SAID deuce: LICK MY DICK spigot: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID spigot: THAT'S WHAT ***SHE***SAID deuce: ALL RIGHT STOP spigot: THAT'S WHAT *******SHE******* SAID!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! deuce: ENOUGH spigot: !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! !!!!! !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!! spigot: !!!!!!!! !!!!! !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! !!!!! spigot: !!!! !!!!! !!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! !!!!!!!! spigot: !!!!! !!!!!!!!!! !! spigot: !! spigot: HURRRRRRRNNNGGGG spigot: !
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#repetition
#so-many-points-one-bubble-cant-contain-them
#woodring-field-background
5,743 10/20/2014 if i'm gonna eat this burrito
pants: IF I'M GONNA EAT THIS BURRITO I'D BETTER TAKE OFF MY SHIRT pants: HURRF pants: NURRRRRGGG pants: GURRRRRKKKTH SNAP PONK pants: MY VERA WANG pants: HUFF PUFF pants: HOMPTH HURMPTH pants: GROSS
pants
#burritos
#eating-burritos-without-a-shirt
#fat
#food
#huffy-pants
#hurf
#onomatopoeia
#pants-solo
#ponk
#sfw
#shirtless
#sound-effects
#stray-dot
#weird-pants-face
5,744 10/21/2014 a ducks says
deuce: "A COW SAYS [TRAIN ENGINE WHISTLE]" pants: "A DOG SAYS [WAR OF THE WORLDS KLAXON]" deuce: BROOOOOOOOOOOONG deuce: A PIG SAYS [SILENT STAR TREK (2009) LENS FLARE] pants: A DUCKS SAYS [QUACK.WAV]
deuce
pants
#animals
#deuce-pants
#duck
#filename
#huffy-pants
#onomatopoeia
#sfw
#sound-effects
#speak-and-say
#urinal-background
#war-of-the-worlds
5,745 10/22/2014 foilage
pants: FOLIAGE deuce: FOILAGE pants: T DEUCE HAVE YOU TALKED TO YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT MAGNETO deuce: T PANTS I'M WAITING FOR THE RIGHT TIME deuce: I'M A LITTLE WORRIED HOW THEY'LL REACT QUITE FRANKLY
deuce
pants
#comics
#deuce-pants
#magneto
#sfw
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
#x-men
5,746 10/23/2014 jerkcity: the musical
deuce: THERE'S NO SUCH THING / AS A DICKLICKER TREE deuce: WHAT'S A JOKE ON YOU / IS A JOKE ON ME pants: GIRLS pants: ON pants: FILM
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicklicker-tree
#drunk-deuce
#duran-duran
#singing
5,747 10/24/2014 not mine
pants: HUGE DONGS deuce: IT AIN'T MY RODEO deuce: BIG DONGS pants: K
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
5,748 10/25/2014 the 3x3 grid
deuce: I'M TRYING TO CRAFT HUMOR HERE deuce: WHERE DOES THE DONG GO IN THE 3X3 GRID pants: WELL IT DOES START WITH A D SO UPPER RIGHT deuce: UPPER LEFT OR UPPER RIGHT pants: AAAAAAAAAAND pants: IF YOU POKE / AND CHOKE IT pants: THEN I WILL / RUN AWAY deuce: I'LL TAKE THE CENTER TO BLOCK
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#hollywood-squares
#huffy-pants
#singing
#twitter
#weird-pants-face
#yellow-background
5,749 10/26/2014 why, indeed
deuce: WHY TRAIN pants: GET COMMISSIONER GORDON ON THE HORN
deuce
pants
#batman
#dc-comics
#deuce-pants
#hospital-background
#sfw
5,750 10/27/2014 deuce juice
pants: DEUCE JUICE pants: FRESHLY-SQUEEZED DEUCE JUICE pants: GET YOUR DEUCE JUICE
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hd
#coy-pants
#deuce-juice
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#stray-dot
#woodring-field-background
5,751 10/28/2014 a very long time indeed
deuce: JUST DIP THEIR DICKS IN FONDUE pants: CAN ME (LONG VERSION: PUT ME IN A CAN) deuce: IF I PASTEURIZE YOU (IN THE CAN) THEN YOU WILL KEEP FOR A VERY LONG TIME deuce: A VERY LONG TIME INDEED pants: COOL
deuce
pants
#can
#canned-pants
#deuce-pants
#fondue
#orange-background
5,752 10/29/2014 pills => addiction => sucking dicks for pills
deuce: BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE YOU'VE CHOSEN THE RIGHT PATH?!?!?!? pants: OH I'M STICKING WITH THE PILLS => ADDICTION => SUCKING DICKS FOR PILLS PATH deuce: OH OKAY GOOD deuce: THIS IS JUST A SIDE QUEST
deuce
pants
#addiction
#choose-your-own-adventure
#cocksucking
#deuce-pants
#drugs
#green-background
#huffy-pants
#sidequest
5,753 10/30/2014 beep beep beep of lowering platform
pants: DOWN I GO deuce: [BEEP BEEP BEEP OF LOWERING PLATFORM] deuce: OKAY NOW YOU'RE AT THE SUCKING LEVEL
deuce
pants
#cocksucking
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#physical-comedy
5,754 10/31/2014 how are you voting
spigot: T PANTS HOW ARE YOU VOTING ON PROPOSITION B spigot: T PANTS WHAT ABOUT PROPOSITION J spigot: T PANTS ARE YOU STILL TYPING YOUR ANSWER
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#sfw
5,755 11/1/2014 we don't
spigot: WE DON'T TALK LIKE THAT IN THIS HOUSE
spigot
#hi-fi
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#watch-the-profanity
#woodring-stairs-background
5,756 11/2/2014 with the
spigot: WHAT spigot: WHO WITH THE SUCKING spigot: BED
spigot
#bed
#confused
#mousehole
#spigot-solo
#sucking
#woodring-room-background
5,757 11/3/2014 actions not words
pants: I LIKE YOUR SMILE deuce: SHOW ME WITH YOUR ACTIONS NOT YOUR WORDS pants: ACTIONS NOT WORDS pants: ACTIONS NOT WORDS pants: GOT IT pants: AND A 1 pants: AND A 2 AND A pants: HONEY I'M HOME deuce: HI HONEY
deuce
pants
#actions
#bored-pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#smile
#woodring-field-background
#words
5,758 11/4/2014 cane my fanny
spigot: SPIGOT / SPIGOT / BO BIGOT spigot: CANE MY FANNY!!!!!! WRITE BACK deuce: HOLD FUCKING STILL
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#hold-still
#name-game
#shirley-ellis
#singing
#woodring-stairs-background
#write-back
5,759 11/5/2014 and how
pants: AHLUGHAGLUALUGHG pants: BAGLBHALGBLUAGHLBG pants: HALGHALGHLAGHLUAG pants: LAGHALUGHALUGGAG pants: FHALGHLUAGHLUAG pants: BLKBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLB pants: AHEM pants: THUNDARR THE BARBARIAN WILL SEE YOU NOW (RIGHT THIS WAY)
pants
#and-how
#bored-pants
#cartoons
#dicklicking
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
5,760 11/6/2014 i want you right now
pants: I SAID I WANT YOU RIGHT NOW deuce: SOMEONE PUT A NEEDLE IN HIS ARM
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#drugs
#mc5
#mountain-background
#needle
5,761 11/7/2014 hhrc
deuce: I THINK FOR CHRISTMAS YOU REALLY WANT HEATHER HUNTER'S RAP CD deuce: AND deuce: ANOTHER COPY OF HEATHER HUNTER'S RAP CD ???? pants: WHY NOT EDDIE MURPHY'S PARTY ALL THE TIME deuce: BUT THAT'S NOT HEATHER HUNTER'S RAP CD (HHRC)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#porn
#rap
#woodring-field-background
5,762 11/8/2014 what a great day
spigot: WHAT A GREAT DAY WITH ALL YOU PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: I REALLY MEAN THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: F IS FOR FAILURE
spigot
#grey-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
5,763 11/9/2014 only after
pants: IT'S ONLY AFTER YOU'VE LOST EVERYTHING THAT YOU'RE FREE TO pants: UH pants: YOU pants: KNOW pants: BE pants: GAY pants: AND pants: STUFF
pants
#empty-auditorium-background
#fight-club
#gay
#pants-solo
5,764 11/10/2014 space is hard and today was a tough day
pants: FUCK YEAH GET BACK ON THAT HORSE pants: THEN GET OFF THE HORSE AND REST pants: YOU'VE HAD A LONG HARD HORSE
pants
#homosexual-undertones
#horse
#pants-solo
#woodring-room-background
5,765 11/11/2014 slide rule
pants: DO YOU HAVE A SLIDE RULE deuce: YES !!!! A ROUND ONE BECAUSE THOSE ARE THE COOLEST deuce: LOGARITHMS ARE HARD pants: I DON'T HAVE ONE MYSELF BUT I HEAR THEY REALLY DRESS UP THE PANTS/BELT AREA
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#homosexual-undertones
#logarithms
#math
#slide-rule
#woodring-stairs-background
5,766 11/12/2014 make sure to get a shot
spigot: MAKE SURE TO GET A SHOT OF MY HUGE BOOBS!!!!!!!!! spigot: BOYS!!!!!!!!!! RIGHT HERE!!!!!!!!! DO YOU LIKE ***BOOBS****?!?!?!?!!? spigot: MACHINE GUN SOUNDS
spigot
#grey-background
#homosexual-undertones
#spigot-solo
5,767 11/13/2014 you and me
pants: T DEUCE LET'S YOU AND ME GO FIND OUR OWN BATCAVE AND GET HIGH pants: T SPIGOT YOU CALL THE JUSTICE LEAGUE pants: T ATANDT YOU CALL THE MARTIAN MANHUNTER
pants
#atandt-deuce-pants-spigot
#batman
#dc-comics
#homosexual-undertones
#justice-league
#marijuana
#mountain-background
5,768 11/14/2014 pong
spigot: OKAY TIME FOR JERKCITY PONG spigot: MISSED spigot: CAN SOMEONE REBOOT PONG
spigot
#black-background
#homosexual-undertones
#pong
#sfw
#spigot
#spigot-solo
5,769 11/15/2014 recast a new set
deuce: I THINK I SHOULD FIRE JERKCITY AND RECAST A NEW SET pants: SEE IF YOU CAN GET MALCOLM MCDOWELL
deuce
pants
#blue-background
#deuce-pants
#gark
#malcolm-mcdowell
#sfw
5,770 11/16/2014 splash each other silly
pants: EVERYBODY DRINK A LOT OF WATER AND BRING A DIXIE CUP pants: MEET ME IN THE PARKING LOT NEAR PAYLESS pants: WE CAN SPLASH EACH OTHER SILLY WITH WARM SALTY GOODNESS
pants
#dixie-cup
#pants-solo
#parking-lot
#piss
#splash
#urine
#urine-party
#watersports
#yellow-background
5,771 11/17/2014 back into the pumpkin
: DEUCE BLOWS BRAINS OUT pants: STUFFING THEM BACK INTO THE PUMPKIN pants: IT'S ALIVE deuce: HLGLHGAHLGAHGA
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#suicide
#typo
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
5,772 11/18/2014 you didn't see nothing
pants: I SEE YOU SUCKING spigot: FUCKING SHUT THE DOOR
pants
spigot
#blue-background
#pants-spigot
#single-panel
#sucking
5,773 11/19/2014 god made this day for me
spigot: GOD MADE THIS DAY FOR ME AND I'M GOING TO SUCK DICK
spigot
#cocksucking
#god
#red-background
#spigot-solo
5,774 11/20/2014 no way no how
pants: YOU MIGHT SAY I'M SANS SERIF IF YOU KNOW WHAT I HURRR pants: VICODIN FOR THE ASS pants: AMBIEN FOR WHAT AILS YA pants: DELICIOUS AFTER DINNER MINTS FOR EVERYTHING ELSE pants: AND YA DON'T STOP pants: IS THAT YOUR DREAMCATCHER pants: I SWEAR I KNOW WHO THE MONSTER IS (pants): WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR
pants
#ambien
#dreamcatcher
#empty-auditorium-background
#font
#mints
#pants-solo
#suppository
#vicodin
#weird-pants-face
#whisper
5,775 11/21/2014 tomorrow
spigot: I CAN ALWAYS CHOKE DOWN THE BONER TOMORROW spigot: TOMORROW spigot: TOMORROW spigot: TOMORROW
spigot
#control-data-institute
#grey-background
#repetition
#spigot-points
#spigot-solo
5,776 11/22/2014 also probably scurvy
deuce: I NEED TO GET SOME SUN BECAUSE I CLEARLY HAVE A VITAMIN D DEFICIENCY deuce: ALSO PROBABLY SCURVY BECAUSE I EAT NOTHING BUT STUPID DICK
deuce
#deuce-solo
#dick
#grey-background
#scurvy
5,777 11/23/2014 pop culture references
spigot: OKAY I WOULD LIKE PANTS AND DEUCE TO STOP DONG-SLAMMING ME WITH THE POP CULTURE REFERENCES pants: WHAP pants: BOP pants: BOP pants: BOP pants: BOP pants: BOP pants: BOP pants: BOP pants: BOP
pants
spigot
#dong-slamming
#huffy-pants
#little-richard
#multipants
#multiplicity
#pants-spigot
#physical-comedy
#repetition
#spigot-points
#woodring-field-background
5,778 11/24/2014 xmas dongs
spigot: CHRISTMAS / CHRISTMAS DONGS / ARE HERE spigot: IN MY MOUTH AND / IN MY EAR
spigot
#christmas
#christmas-carol
#grey-background
#singing
#spigot-solo
5,779 11/25/2014 my day in court
deuce: BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH pants: SHUT UP pants: TODAY IS MY DAY IN COURT AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO RUIN IT pants: BUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
deuce
pants
#buh
#court
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#huffy-pants
#law
#sfw
5,780 11/26/2014 chinese linking rings
spigot: I'LL BE PERFORMING THE CHINESE LINKING RINGS AT TH-- spigot: ACTUALLY HANG ON spigot: DONK BONK OKAY I FORGOT HOW THEY LINK spigot: SERIOUSLY I COULD LINK THEM IF YOU COULD PLEASE GET OFF ME
spigot
#chinese
#grey-background
#magic
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#usenet
#violent-disapproval
5,781 11/27/2014 once an hour
spigot: I NEED AN APP THAT WILL PING ME ONCE AN HOUR TO SAY STOP EATING spigot: T PANTS BTW THANKS FOR THE BREAD
pants
spigot
#fatty
#pants-spigot
#stray-dot
#woodring-field-background
5,782 11/28/2014 what my dong thinks
pants: I HATE MYSELF AND I WANT TO DIE <- WHAT MY DONG THINKS WHEN I CHOKE IT
pants
#choking
#dong
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#violence
#woodring-field-background
5,783 11/29/2014 what reagan meant
spigot: I THINK WHAT REAGAN MEANT WAS TO TEAR DOWN THIS WALL AND PUT UP A STALL pants: I'M A SKEP-CHICK
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#reagan
#skep-chick
#skepchick
#stall
#urinal-background
5,784 11/30/2014 a small asteroid
deuce: FUNNIEST THING EVER: OTHER PEOPLES' SUFFERING deuce: I JUST TOOK A CRAP THE SIZE OF A SMALL ASTEROID
deuce
#asteroid
#deuce-solo
#poop
#woodring-room-background
5,785 12/1/2014 mushroom cloud
pants: CLIENTS FROM HELL!!!!!!!!!!!! deuce: BASTARD OPERATOR FROM HELL !!!!!!!! deuce: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOO deuce: <MUSHROOM CLOUD> deuce: THEN SILENCE, VINES OVERGROWING THE RUBBLE, WILDLIFE RETURNING
deuce
pants
#bofh
#deuce-pants
#mountain-background
#mushroom-cloud
#sad-deuce
5,786 12/2/2014 an editorial from the daily bugle publisher
pants: PARKER GET ME PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN DOIN' IT WITH SOME KIND OF LIZARD GUY OR MAYBE A GUY WITH CRAZY METAL ARMS pants: AND DON'T COME BACK INTO THIS BUILDING UNTIL YOU'VE GOT PICTURES OF MAYBE SPIDER-MAN 69-ING WITH ANOTHER GUY WEARING AN ANIMAL OR INSECT THEMED COSTUME pants: DON'T YOU TALK BACK TO ME PARKER I KNOW SPIDERS AREN'T INSECTS NOW GO OUT THERE AND GET ME PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN BLOWING MAYBE A CLONE OF HIMSELF
pants
#bonequest-hd
#daily-bugle
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#spider-man
#woodring-stairs-background
5,787 12/3/2014 delayed due to rain
: DELAYED DUE TO RAIN
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#pants-solo
#sfw
#technical-difficulties
5,788 12/4/2014 cool site of the day
pants: I'LL HAVE ME SOME OF THAT GAY LIME PIE PLEASE spigot: MY FAT WANG IS COOL SITE OF THE DAY spigot: I ASSURE YOU IT IS THE FATTEST COOLEST SITE OF EVERY DAY pants: MY BIG FAT FACE AND YOUR BIG FAT FACE AND OUR BIG FAT FACES
pants
spigot
#deja-vu
#fat-face
#gay
#internet
#natural-born-killers
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
5,789 12/5/2014 more social more sticky
spigot: MORE BULLET POINTS, MORE LISTS, MORE VISUALS, MORE SHORT-FORM, MORE MICROCONTENT pants: MORE SOCIAL, MORE STICKY, MORE VIRAL, MORE SHAREABLE deuce: MORE HEROIN
deuce
pants
spigot
#buzzwords
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drugs
#heroin
#huffy-pants
#macintosh
5,790 12/6/2014 house rules
pants: NEVER EVER WALK INTO THE FISTING ROOM UNLESS YOU REALLY WANT TO BE IN THERE pants: YOU REALLY HAVE TO RESEARCH IT BEFORE YOU WALK IN pants: SO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GETTING INTO pants: THERE'S A LOT OF COMPLICATED PAPERWORK pants: YOU HAVE TO TIP THE DOORMAN pants: NEVER, EVER GET INTO THE SWING BEFORE YOUR NUMBER IS CALLED pants: AND BE SURE TO SMILE
pants
#fisting-sling
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#smile
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
5,791 12/7/2014 one more
.(spigot): IF I HAVE TO LEARN ONE MORE SCREWY-ASS CURLY-COCK SCRIPTING LANGUAGE I'M GOING TO PISS MYSELF
spigot
#99e99
#empty-auditorium-background
#piss
#programming
#spigot-solo
5,792 12/8/2014 free downloads
spigot: WAIT WAIT WAIT spigot: YOU'RE TELLING ME THESE ARE ***FREE*** DOWNLOADS AND I CAN JUST CLICK HERE TO GET THEM spigot: OKAY ONE MORE TIME
spigot
#click
#click-here
#download
#downloads
#free
#git
#internet
#mountain-background
#spam
#spigot-solo
5,793 12/9/2014 going down with the ship
spigot: ON THE TITANIC THERE WOULD ONLY BE ENOUGH STALLS FOR HALF OF US
spigot
#mustard
#spigot-solo
#stalls
#titanic
#white-background
5,794 12/10/2014 set the alarm for 4am
(spigot): SOMETIMES I SET THE ALARM FOR 4AM AND WAKE UP AND JUST CHECK TO SEE IF MY COCKBOT'S OKAY
spigot
#alarm
#cockbot
#spigot-solo
#whisper
#woodring-field-background
5,795 12/11/2014 the gay we were
DEUCE: THE GAY IT WAS SPIGOT: THAT WAS THE GAY THAT WAS DEUCE: THE GAY WE WERE SPIGOT: THE GAY THE EARTH GAY GAY DEUCE: THE ORIGINAL (NOT THE REMAKE) SPIGOT: RIP STEVE JOBS
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#gay
#minecraft
#minecraft-background
#steve-jobs
5,796 12/12/2014 i just thought
deuce: WELL WHAT WERE YOU EXPECTING spigot: I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE MORE ENJOYABLE THAT'S ALL
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#disappointment
#grey-background
5,797 12/13/2014 jerkcity annual report
SPIGOT: HELLO SPIGOT: SPECIAL CHRISTMAS MESSAGE FOR ALL MY JERKCITY FRIENDS SPIGOT: HO HO SPIGOT: HOO DUH SPIGOT: SUCKING IT
spigot
#christmas
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
5,798 12/14/2014 gone again
spigot: WEIRD AL IS ***BACK***!!!!!!!!!! spigot: OKAY HE'S GONE AGAIN
spigot
#diss
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#weird-al
5,799 12/15/2014 just real quick
spigot: AND I WOULD LIKE TO FONDLE ALL OF YOUR COCKS (JUST REAL QUICK)
spigot
#bonequest-hd
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
5,800 12/16/2014 this is only a test
pants: THIS IS A TEST OF THE EMERGENCY BROADCAST SYSTEM -- THIS IS ONLY A TEST pants: HALGHALGHLAHGLAHGLHALAG pants: THIS IS ONLY A TEST
pants
#bonequest-hd
#pants-solo
#radio
#sfw
#stray-dot
#this-is-a-test
#woodring-field-background
5,801 12/17/2014 the drone files
spigot: CAN DRONES BE USED TO FOLLOW SOMEONE AROUND WITH BIG SIGN THAT SAYS FAG AND MAYBE AN ARROW
spigot
#drone
#fag
#spigot-solo
#stray-dot
#woodring-room-background
5,802 12/18/2014 so much at one time
deuce: SO MUCH DICK deuce: DON'T ACKNOWLEDGE IT, JUST LET IT GO BY deuce: OTHERWISE IT WILL DESTROY OUR CIVILIZATION
deuce
#deuce-solo
#dick
#woodring-stairs-background
5,803 12/19/2014 cough
pants: GARK GARK GARK GARK GARK GARK COUGH IT'S OVER
pants
#cough
#gark
#pants-solo
#sfw
#unf
#woodring-field-background
5,804 12/20/2014 rape culture
spigot: RAPE CULTURE!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: THAT CAME AND WENT, DIDN'T IT
spigot
#feminism
#mountain-background
#rape
#rape-culture
#spigot-solo
#wiener-dog
5,805 12/21/2014 are you going to die
deuce: ARE YOU GOING TO DIE deuce: SLASH ARE YOU DEAD ALREADY pants: I AM NOT SURE pants: IF I DIE PLEASE DO NOT CLEAR MY BROWSER CACHE THE WORLD SHOULD KNOW THE TRUTH
deuce
pants
#browser
#cache
#coy-pants
#death
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#null
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
5,806 12/22/2014 katie couric
spigot: DOES JERKCITY NEED KATIE COURIC IN THE SIDEBAR LIKE YAHOO pants: REALLY NEED TO KNOW HOW YOU ARE FIXED FOR PRICKS spigot: I'M FAIRLY FIXED spigot: SUBSCRIBE AND SHARE AND BE SURE TO LEAVE A COMMENT
pants
spigot
#doop
#fixed-for-pricks
#katie-couric
#pants-spigot
#pricks
#stray-dot
#woodring-stairs-background
5,807 12/23/2014 fair to middlin'
pants: T DEUCE SO HEY I KNOW YOU PROBABLY GET A LOT OF THESE REQUESTS AND I HOPE I'M NOT BOTHERING YOU BUT I WAS HOPING WE COULD DISCUSS HOW YOU'RE FIXED FOR PRICKS deuce: T PANTS I'M FAIR TO MIDDLIN' deuce: ON A 10 POINT SCALE (1 BEING COMPLETELY UNFIXED FOR PRICKS AND 10 BEING COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY FIXED FOR PRICKS) I'D SAY I'M A 6, MAYBE A 7
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fixed-for-pricks
#woodring-stairs-background
5,808 12/24/2014 how are you fixed for pricks
pants: DID WE SPEAK ABOUT PRICKS AND MORE SPECIFICALLY HOW YOU ARE FIXED FOR THEM
pants
#fixed-for-pricks
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
5,809 12/25/2014 order came straight from the top
spigot: TAKE ALL THESE SHITS AND PUT THEM IN THOSE BAGS spigot: NOW TAKE THESE BAGS OF SHIT AND PUT THEM IN THOSE SHIT BAGS spigot: NOW BAG UP THE SHIT BAGS WITH THE BAGS OF SHIT AND TAKE A SHIT ON ALL THE BAGS
spigot
#christmas
#christmas-tree-lights
#shit
#shit-bags
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
5,810 12/26/2014 toilet phone
spigot: FOLKS WHEN YOU GET A NEW PHONE YOUR OLD PHONE BECOMES YOUR TOILET PHONE deuce: I THINK OF YOU AS MY TOILET PHONE deuce: WHAT KIND OF A THING TO SAY IS THAT
deuce
spigot
#boy-scouts
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#folks
#merit-badge
#sfw
#stray-dot
#telephone
#telephony
#toilet
5,811 12/27/2014 cool thanks
atandt: DONGS pants: WHERE atandt: RIGHT HERE pants: COOL THANKS atandt: NO PROB pants: HLUAGHLUAGHLAUHAHLHLHAG
atandt
pants
#cocksucking
#dongs
#irc
#urinal-background
5,812 12/28/2014 hold the football
pants: SERIOUSLY I'LL HOLD THE FOOTBALL AND YOU KICK IT deuce: YOU'RE NOT GOING TO PULL IT AWAY AGAIN ARE YOU pants: NO I RESPECT THE PEOPLE AROUND ME deuce: OK duece: HERE I COME
deuce
pants
#charlie-brown
#deuce-pants
#football
#lucy
#peanuts
#sfw
5,813 12/29/2014 time bomb
pants: TICK TICK TICK TICK TICK BLAM DICKS EVERYWHERE deuce: RAINING DOWN FROM HEAVEN
deuce
pants
#bomb
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#heaven
5,814 12/30/2014 drudge siren
spigot: ATLANTA -- CHANNEL 2 ACTION NEWS HAS CONFIRMED I LICK DICK. deuce: [DRUDGE SIREN] [DRUDGE SIREN] [DRUDGE SIREN]
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#drudge
#stray-dot
#woodring-field-background
5,815 12/31/2014 much better
pants: A MONITOR DEGAUSS WILL CHEER ME UP pants: *FOOMPH* pants: AH
pants
#crt
#foomph
#hi-fi
#monitor-degauss
#pants-solo
#sfw
#stray-dot
#woodring-stairs-background

EPISODES: 2014

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