BONEQUEST

EPISODES: 2018

No. Date   Title / Dialog Players Tags
6,867 1/1/2018 squirt squirt
pants: WOULD SIR CARE FOR WINDEX IN THE EYES
pants
#cleaning
#eye-injury
#pants-solo
#product-placement
#sfw
#single-panel
#windex
#woodring-room-background
#would-sir
6,868 1/2/2018 uptime
pants: HAVE YOU TRIED REBOOTING YOUR OWN BONER deuce: NEVER (UP 16700 DAYS)
deuce
pants
#boner
#deuce-pants
#high-res
#linux
#mountain-background
#reboot
#single-panel
#tech-support
#unix
#uptime
6,869 1/3/2018 your stupid neck
pants: HOW ABOUT JUST CLIMB A LADDER, PISS IN MY FACE AND THEN COME DOWN FROM THERE BEFORE YOU BREAK YOUR STUPID NECK deuce: THAT'S A BIG CAN-DO deuce: SNAP GLK deuce: GLLLK
deuce
pants
#can-do
#choking
#clip-art
#deuce-pants
#injury
#physical-comedy
#piss
#stupid-neck
#tangy
#urinal-background
6,870 1/4/2018 do you take bitcoin
pants: DO YOU TAKE BITCOIN (FOR THE BALLSTOMPING GOODS, THE BALLSTOMPING SERVICES) deuce: CFNM OR DEATH
deuce
pants
#bitcoin
#cfnm
#coy-pants
#cryptocurrency
#deuce-pants
#gentital-mutilation
#grey-background
#nudity
#porn
#single-panel
6,871 1/5/2018 ecclesiastes 6:4
pants: I HOPE THAT WHEN I AM OLD AND ALZHEIMERED MY RAMBLINGS AND BABBLING INCORPORATE EQUAL AMOUNTS OF RELIGIOUSNESS AND TALK ABOUT DICKS deuce: THEY CAN MESH TOGETHER INTO A COHERENT WHOLE pants: CHRIST WILL JUDGE US ALL, REALLY MAKING ME CHOKE deuce: JESUS WOULD HAVE SUCKED THAT COCK WITH NO COMPLAINTS (ECCLESIASTES 6:4)
deuce
pants
#alzheimers
#bible
#buffalo-wild-wings
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#jesus
#religion
#woodring-den-background
6,872 1/6/2018 something stupid again
spigot: DID WE BOTH AGREE TO SOMETHING STUPID AGAIN pants: OH MY YES
pants
spigot
#oh-my-yes
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,873 1/7/2018 pretty clear about that
deuce: THERE'S ONLY TWO WAYS WE CAN LEAVE THIS ROOM: IF I SUCK YOUR DICK OR YOU SUCK MY DICK pants: OR WE CAN JUST LIVE HERE deuce: WHO WILL FEED US pants: GOD WILL FIND A WAY deuce: WELL HE CERTAINLY DOESN'T WANT US TO SUCK EACH OTHER'S DICKS pants: THE BIBLE IS PRETTY CLEAR ABOUT THAT
deuce
pants
#bible
#deuce-pants
#religion
#title-mismatch
#white-background
6,874 1/8/2018 sing with me
: Jerkcity 2018 Annual Report will be delayed this year due to rain. pants: SING WITH ME deuce: WHAT ARE WE SINGING deuce: WIENERS AND BALLS / WIENERS AND BALLS pants: MY ORIGINAL PREMISE WAS FAULTY: NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR US SING
deuce
pants
#annual-report
#balls
#caption
#deuce-pants
#rain
#rudolph-the-red-nosed-reindeer
#silver-and-gold
#singing
#weiners
#woodring-stairs-background
6,875 1/9/2018 autoerotic asphyxiation
effigy: I THINK IF YOU DIE OF AUTOEROTIC ASPHYXIATION, THEY SHOULDN'T PLAY YOUR MUSIC IN THE SAFEWAY
deuce
effigy
#autoerotic-asphyxiation
#deuce-effigy
#drunk-deuce
#inxs
#michael-hutchence
#safeway
#single-panel
#woodring-field-background
6,876 1/10/2018 kitty loaf
deuce: LOOKS LIKE YOUR KITTY WEDGED HIMSELF INSIDE AN ALHAMBRA WATER JUG AND SUFFOCATED TO DEATH pants: CAT LOAF!!!!!!! deuce: YOUR OTHER CAT IS STICKING HIS TONGUE OUT deuce: BECAUSE A CAR BACKED OVER ITS HEAD AND BROKE ITS JAW IN THREE PLACES pants: I CALL THEM ***BLEPS*** deuce: YOUR DOG'S WATER BOWL HAS BEEN EMPTY FOR THREE DAYS deuce: HE FOUND A BAG OF HERSHEY'S KISSES AND HE'S LITERALLY HAVING A SEIZURE RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU pants: THAT GOOD BOYE IS GOING MLEM deuce: YOUR OTHER DOG IS SO UNHAPPY IN THIS TINY TOILET CAGE YOU CALL AN APARTMENT deuce: HE'S FRANTIC TO ESCAPE 24 HOURS A DAY pants: MY DOGGO LOVES HIS ZOOMIES!!!! spigot: YOUR TOUCAN BIT MY DICK OFF pants: BIRBS
deuce
pants
spigot
#animal-cruelty
#birb
#birds
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#frog
#genital-mutilation
#memes
#memespeak
#mlem
#reddit
#seizure
#weird-pants-face
#wholesome-meme
#woodring-room-background
6,877 1/11/2018 if there's one thing
deuce: IF THERE'S ONE THING THEY TEACH YOU IN THEORETICAL PHYSICS, IT'S NO CUM DODGING ALLOWED
deuce
#cum-dodging
#deuce-solo
#high-res
#physics
#single-panel
#woodring-stairs-background
6,878 1/12/2018 gator meat
pants: FLUSHING MY DONG DOWN THE CRAPPER effigy: ...CALLING ROTO-ROOTER pants: REELING IT BACK IN WITH AN ALLIGATOR ATTACHED TO THE TIP pants: EATING IT, FLUSHING IT BACK DOWN FOR MORE GATOR MEAT pants: SOON IT WILL BE CHRISTMAS DAY
effigy
pants
#alligator
#christmas
#dong
#effigy-pants
#fishing
#gator
#hospital-background
#huffy-pants
#plumbing
#sewer-system
#toilet
#welp
6,879 1/13/2018 breathing through my nose
pants: OKAY I NEED YOU TO PISS AND PISS AND PISS UNTIL MY MOUTH IS FULL AND OVERFLOWING (IT'S OKAY, I'LL BE BREATHING THROUGH MY NOSE) deuce: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#high-res
#mouth-of-pants
#piss
#piss-series
#single-panel
#watersports
#woodring-field-background
6,880 1/14/2018 piss drinkers local union 437
pants: YOUR SEARCH - "PISS DRINKERS LOCAL UNION" OR "PISS DRINKERS UNION" -... pants: ...DID NOT MATCH ANY DOCUMENTS. pants: SUGGESTIONS: pants: MAKE SURE ALL WORDS ARE SPELLED CORRECTLY. pants: TRY DIFFERENT KEYWORDS. pants: TRY MORE GENERAL KEYWORDS : PANTS HAS BEEN SENDING MESSAGES TO YOU TOO RAPIDLY, AND IS NOW BEING IGNORED.
pants
#funloving-nonsense
#ignored
#no-results-found
#nu-urinal-background
#pants-solo
#piss
#piss-series
#search-engines
#too-rapidly
#weird-pants-face
6,881 1/15/2018 finger puppets
pants: LOVIN' THE PISS deuce: TELL ME ABOUT IT pants: BETTER YET I'LL DO A SHOW WITH FINGER PUPPETS deuce: EXCELLENT (RUBS HANDS TOGETHER EXCITEDLY)
deuce
pants
#bathrobe
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#finger-puppets
#mountain-background
#piss
#piss-series
6,882 1/16/2018 the squirrels got into the birdseed
pants: WELL WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH THIS PLASTIC BAGGIE OF PISS THEN (INDIGNANT) deuce: WHOOPIE CUSHION TIME!!!! pants: SPLITTING MY PANTS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#for-hes-a-jolly-good-fellow
#funloving-nonsense
#huffy-pants
#piss
#piss-series
#plastic-baggie-of-piss
#pranks
#urinal-background
6,883 1/17/2018 anything to say about nothing
pants: ALL I KNOW IS, I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY ABOUT NOTHING pants: PLEASE REVIEW MY PULL REQUEST
pants
#bloop
#blurp
#bug-report
#grammar
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#pull-request
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,884 1/18/2018 how's my signal strength
spigot: T PANTS IF YOU GET YOUR HAM RADIO LICENSE YOU CAN ASK HOW'S MY SIGNAL STRENGTH AND THEN DO FARTS IN THE BED
pants
spigot
#burp
#farting
#farts
#ham-radio
#hi-fi
#pants-spigot
#radio
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,885 1/19/2018 the quicktime logo
spigot: THE QUICKTIME LOGO IS LITERALLY A DICK POKING THROUGH A HOLE AT YOU
spigot
#apple
#dicks
#dicktime
#quicktime
#sex
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,886 1/20/2018 hugs and gingerbread
pants: WHO WANTS A HUG pants: I'VE GOT A BIG BAG OF HUGS RIGHT HERE pants: HUGS AND GINGERBREAD AND SOMETHING SOMETHING deuce: PASS pants: FINE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#gingerbread
#hugs
#sfw
#urinal-background
#wholesome-meme
6,887 1/21/2018 well then
pants: IS MY FLESH HARAM deuce: ONLY IF YOU'RE NOT SLAUGHTERED PROPERLY pants: WELL THEN
deuce
pants
#cannibalism
#deuce-pants
#dietary-restrictions
#drunk-deuce
#islam
#mountain-background
#sfw
6,888 1/22/2018 flagged
pants: DICKS deuce: FLAGGED AS INAPPROPRIATE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#moderation
#single-panel
#urinal-background
#watch-the-profanity
6,889 1/23/2018 one-buns
spigot: T PANTS YOU TOLD ME YOU BOUGHT ONE-BUNS BUT THEY'RE ACTUALLY OROWHEAT SANDWICH THINS
spigot
#arnold-premium-breads
#food
#hipster
#one-buns
#orowheat
#orowheat-sandwich-thins
#ozery-bakery
#pants-spigot
#product-placement
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,890 1/24/2018 one or two accidental dicks
spigot: T PANTS WILL YOU BE SHARING YOUR PHOTOS OF THE WOMEN'S MARCH (LONG LONG LONG STREAM OF UPSKIRTS) deuce: ONE OR TWO ACCIDENTAL DICKS pants: SOMETIMES THERE ARE DICKS UNDER THE SKIRTS!!!! I CAN'T BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL THE MYSTERY DICKS
deuce
pants
spigot
#blowjob
#current-events
#deuce-pants-spigot
#dickgirl
#dickgirls
#dinosaur
#mystery-dicks
#peeping-tom
#science
#trans-women
#transgender
#transgender-women
#traps
#ts
#upskirt
#urinal-background
#voyeurism
#women
6,891 1/25/2018 a little something like this
spigot: I THINK IF ***JACK NICHOLSON*** spigot: WAS PRESIDENT PLUMPF spigot: IT WOULD SOUND A LITTLE SOMETHING . . . . . . . . . . . LIKE THIS: spigot: YOU HAVE 0 FREE ARTICLES LEFT THIS MONTH spigot: YOU OBVIOUSLY LOVE GREAT JERK CITY COMICS.
spigot
#celebrity-impression
#jack-nicholson
#mutants
#paywall
#politics
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#washington-post
6,892 1/26/2018 how can i break this to you
deuce: YOU'LL HAVE TO INVOKE THE TWENTY-FIFTH AMENDMENT TO GET MY DICK OUT OF YOUR FACE
deuce
#current-events
#deuce-solo
#impeachment
#neon-grid-background
#politics
#potus
#president
#single-panel
6,893 1/27/2018 bent, broken
net: DID SOMEBODY SAY NET deuce: NO net: OK
deuce
net
#deuce-net
#diss
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,894 1/28/2018 don't leave me hanging
deuce: 10 SUCK DICK: GOTO 10 pants: I'M EATING THINGS I FIND IN DRAWERS deuce: MOSTLY COOKIES, STAPLES pants: OOH A PAPER CLIP pants: THIS'LL HURT LATER deuce: EAT A MAGNET; WAIT 10 MINUTES; REPEAT pants: DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING WHAT HAPPENS THEN pants: HMM pants: MY SIDE HURTS
deuce
pants
#bad-decisions
#basic
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#pica
#repetition
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,895 1/29/2018 euroslut
pants: T DEUCE I'M A EUROSLUT deuce: T PANTS I KNOW deuce: HOLY GOD DO I KNOW pants: T DEUCE A EUROSLUT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#funloving-nonsense
#poetry
#typo
#urinal-background
6,896 1/30/2018 just go home for the day
spigot: T PANTS IF YOU EVER SPILL A LITTLE COFFEE ON YOUR ROBERT GRAHAM, JUST GO HOME FOR THE DAY pants: T SPIGOT WHAT IF I'M JUST FULL FROM LUNCH AND MY SHIRT IS FINE spigot: I WOULD STILL TAKE OFF YOUR SHIRT IN THE MICRO KITCHEN AND WRING IT OUT IN THE SINK FOR AT LEAST 1/2 HOUR AND THEN GO HOME FOR THE DAY
pants
spigot
#fashion
#pants-spigot
#robert-graham
#sfw
#urinal-background
#workplace-culture
6,897 1/31/2018 soon enough
pants: DICKS deuce: NO WORRIES deuce: ALL OF THIS WILL BE READ OUT LOUD IN COURT SOON ENOUGH
deuce
pants
#court
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#urinal-background
6,898 2/1/2018 have they
pants: T DEUCE HAVE THEY FOUND YOUR BODY YET deuce: T PANTS NEGATIVE
deuce
pants
#body
#crime
#deuce-pants
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,899 2/2/2018 purchase authorized
pants: PURCHASE AUTHORIZED ON 02/02 GIRL SCOUT COOKIES
pants
#cookies
#drinking
#girl-scouts
#nu-urinal-background
#online-commerce
#pants-solo
#sfw
#single-panel
6,900 2/3/2018 dicks / pricks
pants: A BIG DUMB BONER BEGAN TO POKE pants: A DONG IN A BONG IN A DONG IN A BONG IN A DONG IN MY FUCKING FACE pants: SPLUTTERY SPURT ON MY ROBERT GRAHAM SHIRT pants: DICKS spigot: PRICKS spigot: DID YOU FILL UP YOUR NEW XMAS SOCKS WITH DIARRHEA ??? pants: DICKS spigot: PRICKS spigot: DO YOU CALL YOUR WIFE T-MOBILE BECAUSE OF HER UNLIMITED TALK ??? pants: DICKS spigot: PRICKS spigot: WHEN I SAY FRASIER DO YOU THINK GAYSIER??? pants: DICKS spigot: PRICKS spigot: DO MEN HAVE "TROUBLE" LOCATING THE CLITORIS OR DO WE MAYBE NOT CARE WHERE IT IS pants: DICKS!!! I MEAN PRICKS!!!! pants: BOTH???? spigot: NOT EVEN CLOSE TO BASELINE pants: I'M A REPLI ***CAN'T***
pants
spigot
#blade-runner
#boner
#bong
#christmas
#fashion
#frasier
#funloving-nonsense
#huffy-pants
#nabokov
#pale-fire
#pants-spigot
#poetry
#prose
#robert-graham
#white-background
6,901 2/4/2018 no bird left
pants: A GOOSE RAN OVER MY GRAVE deuce: SO I FUCKED THAT GOOSE GOOD deuce: (EXPLOSION OF SETTLING FEATHERS, NO BIRD LEFT)
deuce
pants
#bestiality
#bird
#birds
#deuce-pants
#duran-duran
#nu-urinal-background
6,902 2/5/2018 then they sat me down
spigot: THEN THEY SAT ME DOWN AND TOGETHER WE ALL WATCHED THE VIDEOTAPE OF ME STEALING THE CANDY
spigot
#candy
#cctv
#loss-prevention
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#theft
#woodring-field-background
6,903 2/6/2018 chicken fries
deuce: CAN'T HELP BUT THINK IT'S TIME FOR CHICKEN FRIES pants: WHY NOT FROG FRIES deuce: BECAUSE 1. THAT'S GROSS AND 2. THOSE DON'T EXIST pants: FAIR POINT
deuce
pants
#chicken
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#fatness
#food
#frog
#huffy-pants
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,904 2/7/2018 progress bar
deuce: MORNING WHACKOFF COMPLETE
deuce
#deja-vu
#deuce-solo
#jerking
#jerking-off
#morning-jerk
#single-panel
#whacking-off
#woodring-stairs-background
6,905 2/8/2018 is it true you can train crows to lick dick
pants: IS IT TRUE YOU CAN TRAIN CROWS TO LICK DICK deuce: SORT OF pants: PERHAPS THE DICK OF A MAN SUCH AS MYSELF deuce: THEY BITE THEM MORE THAN ANYTHING pants: WHAT ABOUT PECKING
deuce
pants
#bestiality
#birds
#crow
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#genital-mutilation
#ornithology
#white-background
#zoophilia
6,906 2/9/2018 a romantic evening part 1 of 2
pants: OW pants: OOCH pants: QUIT pants: STOP pants: OW pants: OW pants: OH WOW pants: OK OH WOW
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#physical-comedy
#series
#sfw
#title-mismatch
#uncredited-character
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-field-background
6,907 2/10/2018 a romantic evening part 2 of 2
pants: OH pants: OH OKAY pants: OKAY pants: OW pants: STOP pants: STOP pants: QUIT pants: QUIT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#physical-comedy
#series
#sfw
#title-mismatch
#uncredited-character
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-field-background
6,908 2/11/2018 watch me plump
spigot: STUFFING pants: WATCH ME PLUMP WHILE I COOK pants: SERIOUSLY YOU'RE NOT LOOKING CLOSELY ENOUGH
pants
spigot
#ball-park-hot-dogs
#fatness
#food
#huffy-pants
#pants-spigot
#plump
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
6,909 2/12/2018 in the stereo sound
pants: IF YOU'RE LISTENING TO THIS IN STEREO pants: THIS VOICE SHOULD BE IN THE LEFT EAR pants: AND THIS VOICE SHOULD BE IN THE RIGHT EAR
pants
#audio
#lanr
#pants-solo
#prius
#stereo
#white-background
6,910 2/13/2018 mickey mouse theme
spigot: FRESHLY BAKED DONGS!!!!!!! spigot: M I C spigot: SEE THAT I'M BORED!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: K E Y spigot: WHY AM I FUCKING HERE spigot: DUH deuce: M O U S E
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#disney
#drunk-deuce
#existential
#spigot-points
#woodring-room-background
6,911 2/14/2018 my own brexit
dick: I'M GOING TO STAGE MY OWN BREXIT, WHO'S IN pants: WILL THERE BE MATZO
dick
pants
#dick-pants
#england
#jews
#nu-urinal-background
#single-panel
#uk
6,912 2/15/2018 don't stop pulling
spigot: THAT'S NOT A WISHBONE BUT DON'T STOP PULLING spigot: MUHUBBLEBLUHDUHHUH MURBLE BURBLE BUTTER BALLS HUBLUBLUHDUH
spigot
#mountain-background
#spigot-solo
#thanksgiving
#turkey
6,913 2/16/2018 doesn't matter, can me
pants: PLEASE PUT ME IN A CAN deuce: BUT THEN HOW WILL YOU GET OUT pants: DOESN'T MATTER, CAN ME
deuce
pants
#canned-pants
#deuce-pants
#piss-trough-background
#sfw
6,914 2/17/2018 i'll make a note of that
spigot: I'LL MAKE A NOTE OF THAT SAID THE PISSING DETECTIVE WHO UNZIPPED HIS PANTS AND ACTUALLY PISSED A NOTATION INTO THE SAND WITH A SPECIAL PISSY CHEMICAL THAT NEVER DRIED OUT spigot: (SO IT STAYS WET)
spigot
#chemicals
#detective
#piss
#pissing
#spigot-solo
#true-crime
#woodring-stairs-background
6,915 2/18/2018 wasd
spigot: USE WASD TO PUT THE FRIES IN SPIGOT'S MOUTH spigot: YOU'RE JUST TYPING SAD DAD WADS OVER AND OVER
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dad
#fatness
#frog
#gaming
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#wasd
6,916 2/19/2018 no problem here or there
spigot: ARE RUSSIAN BOTS PROSTITUTES BECAUSE I SEE NO PROBLEM HERE OR THERE
spigot
#bots
#current-events
#high-res
#prostitutes
#russia
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#title-mismatch
#yellow-background
6,917 2/20/2018 the last thing i'd possibly do
pants: WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH MY BODY AFTER I'VE PASSED deuce: I'M CERTAINLY NOT GOING TO FUCK IT deuce: OF ALL THINGS THAT I MIGHT DO WITH YOUR BODY, THAT'S THE LAST THING I'D POSSIBLY DO deuce: WHICH IS WHY I'M MENTIONING IT FIRST
deuce
pants
#death
#deuce-pants
#necrophilia
#woodring-stairs-background
6,918 2/21/2018 porgs
spigot: GAY AND TRANS PORGS
spigot
#ecu
#gay
#high-res
#porg
#porgs
#single-panel
#space-nuts-background
#spigot-solo
#star-wars
#title-mismatch
#trans
#transgender
#transsexual
#ts
6,919 2/22/2018 i'm with stupid
spigot: I'M WITH STUPID spigot: YOU NEED TO BE ON THE OTHER SIDE spigot: HURRRRR
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#emoji
#hurr
#sfw
#stupid
#white-background
6,920 2/23/2018 first of all
spigot: FIRST OF ALL spigot: YOU NEVER "DOWNLOAD" A PDF spigot: YOU ***CLAIM*** YOUR ***WHITEPAPER***
spigot
#buzzwords
#document
#download
#jargon
#mousehole
#pdf
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#whitepaper
#woodring-room-background
6,921 2/24/2018 soy cappuccino for prashant
pants: CAN I CALL MYSELF A MAN NOW pants: FLEXING NAKED IN FRONT OF MIRROR, TOTALLY LIMP, OATMEAL BUCKET ON HEAD deuce: NO, FIRST WE NEED TO SNIP YOUR DICK pants: OH, THERE YOU ARE pants: SOY CAPPUCCINO PLEASE deuce: NEVER deuce: DEATH FIRST pants: MAKE THAT A DOUBLE deuce: COMING RIGHT UP deuce: (SQUIRTY POO SOUNDS OFF CAMERA) deuce: HERE YOU GO PRASHANT pants: MMM IT'S POO-Y
deuce
pants
#cappuccino
#coffee
#deuce-pants
#dick
#poo
#prashant
#soy
#starbucks
#woodring-field-background
6,922 2/25/2018 stuff it in my mouth
spigot: CUT OFF MY DONG AND STUFF IT IN MY MOUTH, THEN CHOP OFF MY HEAD AND STUFF THAT IN MY REAR END SO VIA THE TRANSITIVE PROPERTY I CAN FUCK MYSELF IN THE ASS spigot: PLEASE DO NOT CUT CORNERS BY JUST CLIPPING OFF MY DONG AND STUFFING THAT IN MY REAR END!!!!!! spigot: AS I WOULD STILL BE ABLE TO COMPLAIN OUT LOUD THAT YOU DID IT WRONG (THANKS IN ADVANCE)
spigot
#ass
#complaining
#dong
#genital-mutilation
#grey-background
#math
#spigot-solo
#stuffing
#transitive-property
6,923 2/26/2018 toilet pigs
deuce: AS ONE DOES??? pants: BY THE BY deuce: NOT FOR NOTHING, BUT DOT DOT DOT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#toilet-pig
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-field-background
6,924 2/27/2018 officially tired
pants: I'M OFFICIALLY TIRED OF THE WORD "TROPES" spigot: HOW ABOUT BESPOKE
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#single-panel
#tropes
#woodring-stairs-background
6,925 2/28/2018 that's about it
pants: BIG DICKS deuce: TELL ME MORE pants: THAT'S ABOUT IT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#woodring-field-background
6,926 3/1/2018 we shall fight on the beaches
deuce: WHERE'S MY PISS JUGS pants: USE A THERMOS deuce: I'LL USE YOUR LEFT CHEEK, RIGHT CHEEK spigot: WE SHALL FIGHT ON THE BEACHES, WE SHALL FIGHT IN THE STALLS
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#piss
#piss-drinking
#piss-jug
#stalls
#thermos
#winston-churchill
#woodring-stairs-background
6,927 3/2/2018 ladyboys and bird feeders
effigy: ALL I COME UP WITH IS LADYBOYS AND BIRD FEEDERS... pants: IT HAPPENS
effigy
pants
#birds
#effigy-pants
#ladyboys
#mountain-background
#sfw
#single-panel
#ts
6,928 3/3/2018 like a normal person
pants: WHY CAN'T YOU JACK ME OFF LIKE A NORMAL PERSON deuce: BECAUSE I DON'T SEE NO RING ON THIS FINGER deuce: NO THIS FINGER deuce: STOP LOOKING AT MY BOOBS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#empty-auditorium-background
#handjob
#huffy-pants
#jacking-off
#starbucks
6,929 3/4/2018 i won't leave the ball pit without a fight
pants: IT'S NORMAL TO SPIT PISS LIKE A FOUNTAIN pants: PFFTPFPTTPFPTPFPTFPT I WON'T LEAVE THE BALL PIT WITHOUT A FIGHT pants: PFPTPFPTPFTPFT PFPTPFPTPFPT THE FOUNTAIN IS DRY deuce: PFFPFPTPFTPFFP WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT
deuce
pants
#ball-pit
#deuce-pants
#fountain
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
#piss
#piss-fountain
#snails
6,930 3/5/2018 jizzy jims
pants: JIZZY JIM WE HARDLY KNEW YE (SERIOUSLY WE KNEW ALMOST NOTHING ABOUT THE MAN OTHER THAN HIS NAME AND HIS HOBBY) deuce: WE EXPLORED HIS ESTABLISHMENT AND IT WAS EMPTY pants: DID HE OWN THE BUILDING OR DID HE RENT pants: WHAT EXACTLY GOES ON IN THERE (WE CAN TAKE EDUCATED GUESSES BUT WE'LL NEVER KNOW FOR SURE)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#grand-theft-auto
#gta4
#jizz
#jizzy-jims
#photo-background
#porn-store
#video-games
6,931 3/6/2018 one hour martinizing
pants: ONE HOUR MARTINIZING deuce: IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT I-- (NO IT IS NOT) deuce: TOO SICK TO SUCK pants: NOT SICK ENOUGH NOT TO SUCK
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#dry-cleaning
#laundry
#los-angeles
#martinizing
#neon-grid-background
#sick
#sucking
6,932 3/7/2018 like us on facebook
pants: YOU OBVIOUSLY LOVE GREAT QUEER VAMPYRE FICTION pants: WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE A SURVEY (ABOUT QUEER VAMPYRE FICTION) pants: THIS QUEER VAMPYRE FICTION WEBSITE USES COOKIES pants: YOU HAVE 5 FREE QUEER VAMPYRE FICTION STORIES LEFT THIS MONTH pants: HI I'M COUNT FAGULA DO YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT QUEER VAMPYRE FICTION pants: CLICK HERE TO GET QUEER VAMPYRE FICTION DELIVERED TO YOUR INBOX : PANTS HAS BEEN SENDING MESSAGES TO YOU TOO RAPIDLY, AND IS NOW BEING IGNORED. spigot: LOL AT ALL OF THE ABOVE BUT MOSTLY A COUNT FAGULA POPUP SLIDING OUT AND STARING AT ME
pants
spigot
#black-background
#enclave
#funloving-nonsense
#ignored
#pants-spigot
#pop-up-ads
#too-rapidly
#vampyre
#viscera
#washington-post
#weird-pants-face
6,933 3/8/2018 having a stroke
pants: HAVING A STROKE (THE GOOD KIND!!!!!) pants: ALSO THE BAD KIND{{{{{{{ {{{{{{{{{{{{{ {{{{{{{{{{{{ {{{{{{{{{{{{ {{{{{{
pants
#handjob
#no-carrier
#nu-urinal-background
#pants-solo
#stroke
#the-good-kind
#weinerdogs
6,934 3/9/2018 this grocery basket
spigot: CHECK OUT THIS GROCERY BASKET (CAN'T UNDO BELT) NVM
spigot
#fatness
#mlem
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,935 3/10/2018 a tour de force
spigot: T DICK HEART pants: T SPIGOT WHAT ABOUT HEART FOR NET spigot: CAN I NOT HAVE HOMEWORK ABOUT EVERYTHING PLEASE pants: HE NEEDS YOUR LOVE spigot: T NET YOU ARE A TOUR DE FORCE (DOT DOT DOT) MESMERIZING ****
dick
net
pants
spigot
#dick-net-pants-spigot
#love
#movie-review
#sfw
#woodring-den-background
6,936 3/11/2018 grope-a-doodle-doo
spigot
#graph
#nitrate
#nitrite
#nitrogen
#oxidation-states
#science
6,937 3/12/2018 the lobster tank at safeway
spigot: I DROPPED MY PHONE IN THE LOBSTER TANK AT SAFEWAY
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#mousehole
#phone
#safeway
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
6,938 3/13/2018 nnngggg
spigot: NNNGGGG THE DEW POINT
spigot
#dew-point
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#weather
#woodring-field-background
6,939 3/14/2018 wispy swishy fey twee
spigot: CONCERNED THE PANTS ICON FEELS A LITTLE WISPY pants: A LITTLE SWISHY spigot: A WHISPER ***FEY*** AND MAYBE A BIT ***TWEE***
pants
spigot
#concerned
#gayness
#meta
#nu-urinal-background
#pants-spigot
6,940 3/15/2018 sorry to see you go
spigot: UNSUBSCRIBE pants: WE'RE SORRY TO SEE YOU GO
pants
spigot
#drugs
#listserv
#mailing-list
#pants-spigot
#piss
#single-panel
#subscription
#woodring-field-background
6,941 3/16/2018 if wishes were wieners
pants: IF WISHES WERE WIENERS deuce: IF FISTS WERE FISHES pants: IF SNAILS WERE SOMETHING S-WORD deuce: IF SNAILS WERE SOCKS pants: SURE LET'S GO WITH SOCKS deuce: ... I'D FUCK 'EM pants: YOU FUCK THAT SOCK deuce: SNAIL pants: TAKE IT OFF MY FOOT FIRST PLEASE deuce: WHY DO YOU HAVE YOUR FOOT IN A SNAIL??? deuce: NEVER MIND, FUCKING IT ANYWAY
deuce
pants
#bestiality
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#red-background
6,942 3/17/2018 pulling for my team
pants: YOU MIGHT SAY I'M PULLING FOR MY TEAM spigot: LET'S JUST SAY I WENT TO THE BATHROOM IN THE MICROWAVE
pants
spigot
#euphemism
#euphemisms
#masturbation
#microwave
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#piss
#pissing
#shit
#single-panel
#sports
6,943 3/18/2018 okay, home
spigot: OKAY, HOME TO CUT MY DICK OFF
spigot
#bobbitt
#empty-auditorium-background
#genital-mutilation
#high-res
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,944 3/19/2018 the scariest monster of all
pants: BUT THE SCARIEST MONSTER OF ALL IS RACISM deuce: NO IT ISN'T deuce: IT'S GHOST ORCS deuce: (THOUGH ADMITTEDLY THE GHOST ORCS ARE PRETTY RACIST, TOO)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#ghost-orcs
#sfw
#yellow-background
6,945 3/20/2018 christ jesus
pants: `GET STARTED: BUILD AN APP ON TWITTER` pants: OW OW THE CORNERS OF MY MOUTH ARE RIPPING pants: `THE PHONE NUMBER IS ALREADY ASSOCIATED WITH ANOTHER TWITTER ACCOUNT.` pants: OH CHRIST JESUS
pants
#blue-background
#christ-jesus
#huffy-pants
#mouth-of-pants
#pants-solo
#twitter
6,946 3/21/2018 setting you on fire instead
pants: PUT ME IN THE HAMPER, I'M DIRTY deuce: SETTING YOU ON FIRE INSTEAD
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fire
#laundry
#red-background
#sfw
#single-panel
6,947 3/22/2018 stop, drop and suck a dick
deuce: EVERYONE STOP, DROP, AND SUCK A DICK effigy: IN THAT ORDER????
deuce
effigy
#butterfly-effect
#cocksucking
#deuce-effigy
#dicklicking
#fire-safety
#grey-background
#single-panel
6,948 3/23/2018 daguerreotype that shit
spigot: . . . . . AND . . . . . . spigot: PISS HOSES pants: PRINT THAT pants: DAGUERREOTYPE THAT SHIT
pants
spigot
#daguerreotype
#pants-spigot
#photography
#piss
#print-that
#publishing
#white-background
6,949 3/24/2018 drink pepsi
spigot: PAY US FOR PRODUCT PLACEMENT AND WE'LL TALK (UNKINDLY) ABOUT YOUR PRODUCT spigot: WE'RE ALREADY TALKING ABOUT IT UNKINDLY, JUST PAY US deuce: BROUGHT TO YOU BY PEPSI, WHICH TASTES LIKE SHIT
deuce
spigot
#advertising
#deuce-spigot
#doop
#drunk-deuce
#irc
#pepsi
#product-placement
#yellow-background
6,950 3/25/2018 well here's what i think
spigot: JUST TIRED OF WEBCOMICS THAT AREN'T US pants: WELL HERE'S WHAT I THINK: [LASER BEAM CHOPPING OFF HEADS]
pants
spigot
#beheading
#laser
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#single-panel
#violence
#webcomic
#white-background
6,951 3/26/2018 agreeable, plump
pants: I AM AS AGREEABLE AS I AM PLUMP
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#fatness
#high-res
#pants-solo
#plump
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-room-background
6,952 3/27/2018 if you're here then
pants: I WOULD JUST LIKE TO SAY FOR THE RECORD THAT I AM A HUGE FAG spigot: IF YOU'RE HERE THEN WHO'S GUARDING THE PRESIDENT
pants
spigot
#ass-man
#fag
#for-the-record
#huge-fag
#mousehole
#pants-spigot
#pew
#president
#secret-service
#woodring-room-background
6,953 3/28/2018 scan complete
pants: SCANNING FOR `BOYS` pants: SCAN COMPLETE: NO `BOYS` FOUND pants: TOTAL NUMBER OF `BOYS` : 0
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cruising
#pants-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,954 3/29/2018 school, workplace, church, mall
pants: DICKS deuce: DICKS pants: T SPIGOT NOW YOU SAY DICKS!!! spigot: DICKS deuce: NOW WE CAN ALL SHOOT UP A SCHOOL/WORKPLACE/CHURCH/MALL
deuce
pants
spigot
#current-events
#deuce-pants-spigot
#dicks
#green-background
#gun-violence
#shooting
#shootings
#weird-pants-face
6,955 3/30/2018 10:34
spigot: KCBS BEATOFF TIME IS 10:34
spigot
#beatoff
#broadcast
#ecu
#high-res
#masturbation
#negativland
#neon-grid-background
#radio
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,956 3/31/2018 say please
pants: GALHLAGHLAHG SUCK IT pants: SUCK IT PLEASE deuce: SAY PLEASE (REFUSING TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOU ALREADY SAID PLEASE) pants: PLEASE (GOING WITH THE FLOW)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#null
#sucking
#woodring-stairs-background
6,957 4/1/2018 putting you to sleep
pants: SHOULD WE PUT YOU TO SLEEP deuce: I THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER ASK pants: THERE, THERE pants: NO SERIOUSLY RIGHT THERE (POINTING AT LAP)
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#lap
#sleep
#urinal-background
6,958 4/2/2018 you can't or you won't
pants: JACK ME OFF BACKWARDS THIS TIME deuce: DO YOU MEAN FORTH AND BACK RATHER THAN BACK AND FORTH deuce: OR IS THIS SOME PARITY TRANSFORMATION WHERE WE'RE... deuce: ...WATCHING EACH OTHER THROUGH A MIRROR pants: PUT THE TOOTHPASTE BACK IN THE TUBE IS WHAT I'M SAYING deuce: I CAN'T pants: YOU CAN'T OR YOU WON'T
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#jacking-off
#nu-urinal-background
#toothpaste
#weird-pants-face
6,959 4/3/2018 how many lumps
pants: HOW MANY LUMPS OF POLONIUM WOULD YOU LIKE IN YOUR TEA DEAR deuce: 684 deuce: LET'S DO THIS RIGHT
deuce
pants
#assassination
#current-events
#deuce-pants
#filler-panel
#piss-trough-background
#polonium
#russia
#sfw
#tea
6,960 4/4/2018 officially coming out
deuce: FOLKS I'M OFFICIALLY COMING OUT AS ***STRAIGHT*** pants: HOLY GOD MISTER deuce: I MEAN ***BORED*** pants: CAN I GO HOME NOW
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#straight
#straightness
6,961 4/5/2018 how far would you go
spigot: QUICK QUESTION: HOW FAR WOULD YOU GO TO PROTECT YOUR FAMILY deuce: I'D SUCK -1 DICKS deuce: NAN DICKS pants: NULL deuce: (NULL) deuce: `UNDEFINED` pants: SO NO DICKS THEN deuce: I HAVE NO IDEA ANYMORE pants: WELL LET'S TABLE THIS DISCUSSION
deuce
pants
spigot
#all
#deuce-pants-spigot
#kpdd
#select
#union
#woodring-den-background
6,962 4/6/2018 touched by god
pants: WHAT DOES IT MEAN WHEN YOU'RE PISSING BUT INSTEAD OF URINE IT'S ANGELS AND THEY ARE SINGING REPENT IN THE SWEEST VOICE BUT THEN THEY'RE NOT ANGELS THEY ARE DEVILS AND THEY ARE STABBING ME AND DRAGGING ME DOWN AND IT HURTS SO MUCH AND I'M IN SO MUCH PAIN AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING ANYTHING TO STOP THE ETERNAL SUFFERING AND TORMENT AND THE DEVIL VOICES ARE ALSO BEAUTIFUL LIKE ANGELS BUT THEY ARE SAYING THAT I WAS DECEIVED BY THE SERPENT'S CUNNING AND
pants
#pants-solo
#pissing
#religion
#run-on-sentence
#serpents-cunning
#single-panel
#white-background
6,963 4/7/2018 the making of jizzy jim's: behind the scenes
deuce: WHAT'S AFAF DOING THERE pants: THAT REPRESENTS THE MICROSOFT CHAT CLIENT deuce: IS THAT THE OBSERVING CLIENT WATCHING THE CONVERSATION pants: AND HOW deuce: WANNA LICK DICK pants: MAYHAP
deuce
pants
#and-how
#behind-the-scenes
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#grand-theft-auto
#green-background
#gta4
#jizz
#jizzy-jims
#ms-chat
#porn-store
#video-games
#weird-pants-face
#windows
6,964 4/8/2018 right before bedtime
spigot: I DON'T LIKE READING ABOUT GAY PEOPLE RIGHT BEFORE BEDTIME spigot: DENZEL WASHINGTON ***IS*** spigot: MARVIN K. MOONEY
spigot
#denzel-washington
#dr-seuss
#gay
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,965 4/9/2018 if i could be any kind of cock
deuce: IF I COULD BE ANY KIND OF COCK I'D BE A GAMECOCK deuce: OR A FAT COCK deuce: ONE OF THOSE pants: FOR ME I'M TOTALLY A SHUTTLECOCK deuce: THAT'S A BETTER CHOICE, REALLY
deuce
pants
#cocks
#deuce-pants
#nu-urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,966 4/10/2018 got a light
pants: "I WONDER WHAT'S SO SPECIAL ABOUT S3E8" AND THEN BOOOOOOM I AM A MAN TODAY spigot: WELL PERHAPS A DAY WILL COME WHEN WE (((UNPACK))) WHAT WE WATCHED spigot: MEANWHILE: SILENT pants: IT'S STILL TOO MUCH LIKE WALKING IN ON MOM AND DAD DOIN' IT, CAN'T DISCUSS pants: OR DAD AND OTHER DAD spigot: Y pants: DAD AND ALL HIS FRIENDS FROM THE GYM pants: AND MOM'S ON THE PORCH AND SHE'S SIPPING ICED TEA CRYING SILENT TEARS pants: AND spigot: PRESSING PLAY AND RECORD
pants
spigot
#gaydads
#hospital-background
#pants-spigot
#twin-peaks
#weird-pants-face
6,967 4/11/2018 pies cooling on the windowsill
spigot: I WANT EVERYONE THE FUCK OUT OF MY KITCHEN AND CLOSE THE DOOR ON YOUR WAY OUT pants: I WILL LIMIT MY ROLE TO OPENING ONE LAZY EYE FROM THE HAMMOCK TO CHECK FOR PIES COOLING ON THE WINDOWSILL
pants
spigot
#lazy
#pants-spigot
#pie
#smouldering-crater
#woodring-field-background-2
6,968 4/12/2018 thank you for pretending to give a shit
pants
spigot
#balloon
#bonequest-hi-fi
#picture
#skylight
6,969 4/20/2018 sex change
deuce: I WANT A SEX CHANGE pants: WHICH DIRECTION deuce: SURPRISE ME
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#sex-change
#ts
#woodring-stairs-background
6,970 4/21/2018 how to spot a deep fake
spigot: HOW TO SPOT A DEEP FAKE!!!!! spigot: STEP ONE: LOOK AT IT
spigot
#advice
#deep-fake
#deepfakes
#how-to
#mountain-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
6,971 4/22/2018 earth day
pants: A SHOT RINGS OUT pants: WINDOW BREAKS pants: WOMAN SCREAMING pants: SOMEBODY SUCKS A DICK pants: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK AFTER THESE MESSAGES pants: T DEUCE AS YOU KNOW EARTH DAY IS COMING UP deuce: A N A L pants: IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND
deuce
pants
#anal
#cocksucking
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#earth-day
#nu-urinal-background
#telepathy
#uncredited-character
#weird-pants-face
6,972 4/23/2018 done talkin' for now
spigot: DONE TALKIN' FOR NOW (BOOZE KICKING IN) pants: GO TEAM
pants
spigot
#alcohol
#booze
#mousehole
#pants-spigot
#single-panel
#talking
#team
#teamwork
#woodring-room-background
6,973 4/24/2018 carefully examining the cock in his face
pants: NO, IT'S NOT SHI'AR
pants
#ball
#comics
#marvel
#nu-urinal-background
#pants-solo
#single-panel
#viscera
6,974 4/25/2018 squeaking noises
pants: CHOP ALL OF OUR HEADS OFF deuce: ALREADY SEVERED pants: SOMEHOW STILL YAPPING deuce: MOUTH STILL MOVING, GOES SILENT IMMEDIATELY, STILL SOMEHOW JUST AS ANNOYING pants: SQUEAKING NOISES
deuce
pants
#beheading
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#piss-trough-background
#sfw
6,975 4/26/2018 answers to questions nobody is asking
pants: A GUMP WITH A TALL BANK
pants
#bank
#gump
#pants-solo
#single-panel
#tall
#woodring-field-background
6,976 4/27/2018 growling around the house
spigot: BRILLIANT spigot: ARE YOU SEEING THIS BEAUTIFUL MORNING pants: BATHROBE, COFFEE, WIENERDOG CLAMPED FIRMLY TO MY ANKLE DRAGGING IT GROWLING AROUND THE HOUSE
pants
spigot
#bathrobe-of-pants
#bong
#dog
#huffy-pants
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#wienerdog
#woodring-stairs-background
6,977 4/28/2018 also no talking
pants: WELP I'M GOING TO HAVE TO CHOP YOU DOWN (WE NEED WOOD FOR WINTER) deuce: VERY WELL pants: TRY AND HOLD STILL PLEASE deuce: WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT pants: ALSO NO TALKING deuce: A BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH STILL TALKING A BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-field-background
6,978 4/29/2018 two fat dipshits
pants: I'M WEARING LEATHER ARMOR WHICH GIVES ME AN ARMOR CLASS OF (SQUINTING) 10 deuce: THAT'S NOT A GOOD AC pants: MIGHT AS WELL NOT BE WEARING IT deuce: SMALLER IS BETTER!!!! LIKE STELLAR MAGNITUDE AND MY DICK pants: OW OW OW MORE ARROWS
deuce
pants
#armor-class
#deuce-pants
#dungeons-and-dragons
#mountain-background
#rpg
#weird-pants-face
6,979 4/30/2018 eyewitnesses are notoriously unreliable
pants: EYEWITNESSES SAY YOU'RE A FAG deuce: EYEWITNESSES ARE ALSO NOTORIOUSLY UNRELIABLE deuce: ALSO UNSUBSCRIBE pants: IS JIZZFEST ON MONDAY AGAIN THIS YEAR deuce: IT'S EVERYDAY (DUH) pants: OKAY HERE'S MY PITCH: IT'S CALLED THE HOMO SHOPPING NETWORK AND
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#jizzfest
#mailing-list
#mountain-background
#not-gay
#television
6,980 5/1/2018 can't remember if i've asked this before so
pants: PLEASE FAV ME deuce: UNSUBSCRUBE pants: FINE pants: CAN'T REMEMBER IF I'VE ASKED THIS BEFORE SO IGNORE ME IF I HAVE: PLEASE FAV ME deuce: UNSUBSCRIBE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#mailing-list
#mountain-background
#weird-pants-face
6,981 5/2/2018 EPOTOCCUPIED
pants: ANYWAY: PISS IN MY POT pants: HE'S LOOKING AT ME BETTER SAY SOMETHING pants: DICKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: THAT WENT POORLY deuce: CANNOT PISS IN POT; ALREADY CONTAINS CHICKEN deuce: `EPOTOCCUPIED` pants: WELL AS IT TURNS OUT THIS PARTICULAR CHICKEN LOVES PISS pants: WE CALL THEM TOILET BIRDS
deuce
pants
#birds
#bonequest-hi-fi
#chicken
#deuce-pants
#errno
#piss
#title-mismatch
#toilet
#toilet-pig
#unix
#weird-pants-face
#yellow-background
6,982 5/3/2018 right between my eyes
pants: JUST PRESS THE MUZZLE RIGHT BETWEEN MY EYES SO YOU DON'T MISS OR FLINCH
pants
#coy-pants
#dinosaurs
#murder
#pants-solo
#rape
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,983 5/4/2018 email without a subject
spigot: CAUTION: ANTI-PATTERNS AHEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: EMAIL WITHOUT A SUBJECT pants: TELL ME ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH POTATOES pants: DO YOU BAKE THEM, DO YOU FRY THEM, DO YOU POKE A LITTLE HOLE IN THEM FOR SEXUAL PURPOSES deuce: THE LAST
deuce
pants
spigot
#anti-pattern
#deuce-pants-spigot
#email
#food
#potato
#urinal-background
6,984 5/5/2018 the show me state
deuce: SHOW ME pants: NEVER deuce: BUT I'M FROM THE SHOW ME STATE pants: WELL WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#missouri
#null
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,985 5/6/2018 palm fronds
spigot: TICKLE MY BALLS WITH A PALM FRONDS AND TELL ME IT'S THE FORCE deuce: WELL LET'S JUST SAY THE FORCE IS AWAKENING
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#guitar-solo
#jedi
#nuts-of-spigot
#single-panel
#space-nuts-background
#star-wars
#the-force
#the-force-awakens
#typo
6,986 5/7/2018 the greatest miracle of miracles
pants: ...WHAT WAS IT? pants: DID A METEOR FALL DOWN pants: WAS IT A VISIT BY CITIZENS OF THE VAST SPACE pants: SO OR OTHERWISE IN OUR LITTLE COUNTRY APPEARED pants: THE GREATEST MIRACLE OF MIRACLES pants: THE ZONE pants: WE SENT THERE THE TROOPS IMMEDIATELY pants: THEY DID NOT COME BACK pants: THEN WE SURROUNDED THE ZONE WITH POLICE CORDONS pants: AND, I SUPPOSE, THAT WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO pants: ACTUALLY, I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW
pants
#disaster-response
#funloving-nonsense
#hospital-background
#meteor
#miracle
#pants-solo
#piss
#police
#stalker
6,987 5/8/2018 really
pants: I WEAR SWIM TRUNKS AS UNDERPANTS deuce: REALLY pants: NO I JUST WANTED ATTENTION
deuce
pants
#clothes
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#sfw
#underpants
6,988 5/9/2018 touch it
effigy: MMMMM deuce: YEAH TOUCH IT spigot: DON'T
deuce
effigy
spigot
#deuce-effigy-spigot
#touch
#touching
#white-background
6,989 5/10/2018 hey check out my penis
deuce: HEY CHECK OUT MY PENIS (POINTS AT PENIS) pants: HEY WOW THAT'S A PENIS pants: IS THERE A STARBUCKS NEARBY deuce: YES THERE IS (STILL POINTING AT PENIS)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#starbucks
#woodring-stairs-background
6,990 5/11/2018 with practice you'll get better
spigot: I SURELY WISH IT DIDN'T TAKE ME THAT LONG TO GET MY REAR-END TOPMOST deuce: WITH PRACTICE YOU'LL GET BETTER
deuce
spigot
#ass
#deuce-spigot
#empty-auditorium-background
#practice
#rear-end
#single-panel
6,991 5/12/2018 now listen to me
spigot: T PANTS NOW LISTEN TO ME (LONG DAVID LYNCH / GORDON COLE PAUSE) spigot: IF I spigot: IF A;LAKSDJF;LAKSDJF
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#twin-peaks
#urinal-background
6,992 5/13/2018 nugggh
pants: ORGIE PORGIE GIVES RELEASE deuce: ORGIE PORGIE WAS FRAMED pants: NUGGGH
deuce
pants
#brave-new-world
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#nuggh
#orgy-porgy
#urinal-background
#xanax
6,993 5/14/2018 shining in the night
deuce
spigot
#christmas
#deuce-spigot
#filler-panel
#singing
#urinal-background
6,994 5/15/2018 chokity choke choke
deuce
pants
#choking
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#tcp-ip
#urinal-background
6,995 5/16/2018 bare bones and no-frills
deuce
spigot
#cocksucking
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#radio
#urinal-background
6,996 5/17/2018 count down
pants
#anal
#countdown
#frog
#pants
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
6,997 5/18/2018 sexchicks with your rotorpump
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#poo
#rotorpump
#single-panel
#woodring-stairs-background
6,998 5/19/2018 what hath god wrought
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fat
#funloving-nonsense
#ghetto-u
#neon-grid-background
#title-mismatch
#urine
#watersports
#weird-pants-face
6,999 5/20/2018 like a broken record
pants
#bored-pants
#pants-solo
#piss
#piss-tarp
#single-panel
#urinal-background
#watersports
7,000 5/21/2018 anyway here's a picture of a horse if that helps
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#equine
#horse
#no-dialog
#not-gay
#picture
#sfw
#uncredited-character
7,001 5/22/2018 good at finding truffles
pants
#forbidden-zone
#funloving-nonsense
#moustache
#oingo-boingo
#pants-solo
#sfx
#truffles
#typo
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,002 5/23/2018 sleeping in the garden
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dong
#huffy-pants
#urinal-background
7,003 5/24/2018 food hacking
spigot
#combination
#combine
#farts
#folks
#food
#food-hacking
#gastronomy
#hacking
#michelin-star
#molecular-gastronomy
#pizza
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
7,004 5/25/2018 these days i feel like i do nothing right
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#red-background
#sfw
#topical
7,005 5/26/2018 turning purple
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#genital-mutilation
#pants-solo
#single-panel
#woodring-field-background-2
7,006 5/27/2018 my neck and legs and balls
pants
spigot
#gambling
#modem
#nat-king-cole
#pants-spigot
#serial
#singing
#woodring-stairs-background
7,007 5/28/2018 can't i just
deuce
spigot
#banner-ads
#deuce-spigot
#jurassic-park
#money
#woodring-field-background
7,008 5/29/2018 just caked on there
deuce
net
#deuce-net
#net
#nu-urinal-background
#shit
7,009 5/30/2018 tug it out like a weed
pants
#coy-pants
#funloving-nonsense
#michael-j-fox
#pants-solo
#porn
#professionalfelching
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-field-background
7,010 5/31/2018 dicks dicks dicks
pants
spigot
#bonequest
#dicks
#pants-spigot
#single-panel
#urinal-background
7,011 6/1/2018 the business of dicks
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#yellow-background
7,012 6/2/2018 as high as you let them
effigy
#bonequest-hi-fi
#computers
#effigy
#effigy-solo
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-stairs-background
7,013 6/3/2018 but i still have to work the stage and all
deuce
pants
#but-i
#caption
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
7,014 6/4/2018 chocolate banana money
pants
spigot
#behind-the-scenes
#deja-vu
#screenshot
#sfw
#shutdown
#single-panel
#windows
7,015 6/5/2018 no habla
deuce
spigot
#aids
#deuce-spigot
#sfw
#single-panel
#spanish
#white-background
7,016 6/6/2018 six more weeks
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#diarrhea
#groundhog-day
#poo
#squirts
#woodring-room-background
7,017 6/7/2018 strawberries
spigot
#caption
#science
#sfw
#spigot-points
#spigot-solo
#spigot-the-bear
#urinal-background
7,018 6/8/2018 no that would be wrong
deuce
pants
#amodestproposal
#bestcomicever
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#woodring-stairs-background
#worstcomicever
7,019 6/9/2018 almost done
pants
spigot
#blumpkin
#funloving-nonsense
#hamburgs
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#woodring-room-background
7,020 6/10/2018 piss-testing
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#piss
#urinal-background
7,021 6/11/2018 the genders of people on the surface of a planet
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dickscan
#grey-background
#star-trek
7,022 6/12/2018 the real protagonist
pants
spigot
#ham-radio
#infocom
#modem
#pants-spigot
#piss
#sfw
#single-panel
#title-mismatch
#toilet
#yellow-background
7,023 6/13/2018 impressively casually sexist
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#sfw
#television
#title-mismatch
#white-background
7,024 6/14/2018 k got it
pants
spigot
#drinking
#pants-spigot
#piss-trough-background
#police
7,025 6/15/2018 do i store butterflies in you
deuce
pants
#cloaca
#deuce-pants
#frog
#yellow-background
7,026 6/16/2018 let me drink you in
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#funloving-nonsense
#god
#minecraft-background
#piss
#programming
#weird-pants-face
7,027 6/17/2018 reversing time
deuce
pants
#blue-background
#clipart
#comics
#deuce-pants
#film
#lois-lane
#physics
#ping
#radiation
#science
#strike-out
#superman
#time-travel
7,028 6/18/2018 two diapers in my everyday life
pants
spigot
#bark
#diapers
#mousehole
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#single-panel
#torrenting
#woodring-room-background
7,029 6/19/2018 what kind of house is this
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#null
#sfw
#shuttlecock
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-den-background
7,030 6/20/2018 the taxonomy of dick
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#kaiser
#lifequacks
#onomatopoeia
#unix
#weird-pants-face
7,031 6/21/2018 confused, somber silence
spigot
#cocksucking
#dick
#dicklicking
#dicks
#single-panel
#somber
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
7,032 6/22/2018 two d's, two b's
pants
#boner
#cannes
#coy-pants
#dong
#pants-solo
#syntax
#unix
#woodring-field-background
7,033 6/23/2018 a gift for the neighbors
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#filename
#hospital-background
#poo
#smearing
#unix
#weird-pants-face
7,034 6/24/2018 this isn't easy for me
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dicklicking
#farts
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
7,035 6/25/2018 yet again
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#nobel-prize
#piss
#science
#urine
#woodring-room-background
7,036 6/26/2018 lotsa hits
pants
spigot
#black-background
#crohns
#high-res
#plugin
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
7,037 6/27/2018 clampy, chompy
pants
#clamping
#frog
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,038 6/28/2018 not infinite but arbitrarily high
deuce
pants
#balls
#deuce-pants
#math
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,039 6/29/2018 roger those balls
deuce
effigy
#balls
#deuce-effigy
#filler-panel
#urinal-background
7,040 6/30/2018 where my life went so right
deuce
pants
#craigslist
#deuce-pants
#drinking
#prostitute
#white-background
7,041 7/1/2018 pizza shitposting
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dicks
#pizza
#shitposting
#woodring-room-background
7,042 7/2/2018 enjoying a large pizza
spigot
#burnout
#funloving-nonsense
#pizza
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
7,043 7/3/2018 toy story 4
spigot
#beating-off
#deuce-pants
#mousehole
#movies
#physical-comedy
#single-panel
#toy-story
#typo
#woodring-room-background
7,044 7/4/2018 patriotism
deuce
pants
#america
#deuce-pants
#fashion
#fatness
#fourth-of-july
#independence-day
#patriotism
#sfw
#shutterstock
#stock-photo
#woodring-field-background
7,045 7/5/2018 please don't tell
spigot
#cosby
#double-fister
#fatness
#filler-panel
#rough-trade
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
#zinger
7,046 7/6/2018 not a one
deuce
pants
#blood-meridian
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cormac-mccarthy
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#foomph
#outhouse
#upskirt
#urinal-background
7,047 7/7/2018 you're fuckin' hot
deuce
pants
#colonblow
#deuce-pants
#hot
#nu-urinal-background
#sexy
7,048 7/8/2018 so i don't fall out of practice
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#neon-grid-background
#professional
#professionaldickdart
#single-panel
#stray-dot
7,049 7/9/2018 the home we built for you
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#guhhhh
#typo
#urinal-background
#wienerdog
7,050 7/10/2018 spawning a serious thread
spigot
#balls
#boner
#cakefartsdotcom
#decaffeinated
#mousehole
#spigot-solo
#thread
#woodring-room-background
7,051 7/11/2018 coincidence
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#kitchen
#nudity
#urinal-background
#urinalbirthdaycake
7,052 7/12/2018 more quietly (musical numbers)
pants
#beating-off
#musical
#nu-urinal-background
#pants-solo
7,053 7/13/2018 boring and itchy
pants
#coy-pants
#dick-measuring
#girth
#linux
#perl
#urinal-background
7,054 7/14/2018 the modem wizard
spigot
#doorbell
#dungeons-and-dragons
#hurf
#modem
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
7,055 7/15/2018 forced
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#forced
#punctuation
#sfw
#urinal-background
7,056 7/16/2018 beating off for 72 hours straight
spigot
#beating-off
#cloud
#cocaine
#coke
#deja-vu
#dick
#mountain-background
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
7,057 7/17/2018 we'll see
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dongs
#dumb-dongs
#sfw
#single-panel
#white-background
#wienerschnitzel
7,058 7/18/2018 flickr is now smugmug
spigot
#aids
#dickr
#empty-auditorium-background
#flickr
#kitty
#millennial
#shutterfly
#smugmug
#spigot-solo
7,059 7/19/2018 the things we did
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#dickonthecob
#existential
#hi-fi
#karma
#repentance
#sfw
#single-panel
7,060 7/20/2018 tangerine lacroix
pants
spigot
#fatness
#food
#lacroix
#nutrition
#pants-spigot
#potassium
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
7,061 7/21/2018 why do i talk
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fight
#sfw
#single-panel
#spacedocking
#toy
#white-background
7,062 7/22/2018 i need a hug
deuce
pants
#abuse
#deuce-pants
#drugs
#drunk-deuce
#hugs
#mousehole
#mudbutt
#pills
#woodring-room-background
7,063 7/23/2018 two large obviously gay bats
deuce
spigot
#bat
#deja-vu
#deuce-spigot
#flappity-bats
#gay
#gay-bats
#radar
#single-panel
#technical
#viscera
#white-background
7,064 7/24/2018 woke af
deuce
pants
#balls
#basket
#deuce-pants
#dick
#nuggh
#urinal-background
7,065 7/25/2018 after life
deuce
pants
spigot
#afterlife
#deuce-pants-spigot
#mountain-background
#poo
#single-panel
7,066 7/26/2018 my 4000 is fine
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#organic
#planned-obsolescence
#rape
#robot
#single-panel
#urinal-background
7,067 7/27/2018 pyroclastic flow
deuce
pants
#balls
#deuce-pants
#dickcano
#geology
#jacking-off
#jerking
#nu-urinal-background
#prison
#pyroclastic-flow
#single-panel
#volcano
7,068 7/28/2018 curly braces
effigy
#effigy
#effigy-solo
#neon-grid-background
#programming
#punctuation
#python
#sfw
#single-panel
7,069 7/29/2018 some people
deuce
pants
#boardwalk-empire
#deuce-pants
#gravel
#nu-urinal-background
#sfw
7,070 7/30/2018 get your hands up
spigot: hands up who's over his head
spigot
#frog
#hands-up
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#title-mismatch
#woodring-stairs-background
7,071 7/31/2018 right up your alley
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#huffy-pants
#sfw
#single-panel
7,072 8/1/2018 duckwards
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#duck
#nu-urinal-background
#sfw
7,073 8/2/2018 it's just you and me
pants
#boner
#hi-fi
#hospital-background
#pants-solo
#piss
#piss-tarp
#title-mismatch
7,074 8/3/2018 can't you beat off normally
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#crying
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
#single-panel
7,075 8/4/2018 tarkovsky solaris
spigot
#bonequest
#downloads
#movies
#piss-trough-background
#science-fiction
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
7,076 8/5/2018 regular worms
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#gay
#papers
#woodring-stairs-background
#worms
7,077 8/6/2018 be careful
deuce
pants
#casino
#deuce-pants
#laughing-deuce
#movies
#sfw
#sharon-stone
#single-panel
#title-mismatch
#woodring-stairs-background
7,078 8/7/2018 ya gotta test it
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#lemonade
#mom
#piss
#white-background
7,079 8/8/2018 forced inside out
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#feelings
#mountain-background
#nuggh
#sfw
#single-panel
7,080 8/9/2018 very seriously and very respectfully
spigot: want you to know i take peacock week very seriously and very respectfully spigot: t pants totally arranging my cc icons in the dock like a rainbow spectrum
spigot
#adobe
#dicklicking
#macintosh
#mountain-background
#peacock
#rainbow
#spigot-solo
7,081 8/10/2018 bonequest annual report 2018
spigot: art is for fags
spigot
#annual-report
#art
#fags
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
7,082 8/11/2018 if it dribbles it leads
spigot: "soaked" "drenched" "showered" spigot: folks if it dribbles it leads spigot: get me pics of spiderman pissing on people
spigot
#deja-vu
#folks
#piss
#spider-man
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
7,083 8/12/2018 three jumbo candy canes
spigot: i have to do a bunch of performance review bullet point achievement type shit spigot: i'm just gonna say i fit three jumbo candy canes in my mouth over xmas break deuce: at the same time?!!?! spigot: no but i'm not going to say that obviously
deuce
spigot
#candy
#christmas
#deuce-spigot
#dick-wolf
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#hi-fi
#law-and-order
7,084 8/13/2018 fortress of solitude
pants: ooh ooh / baby baby pants: can i take the bag off my head now pants: i swear to god i won't tell anybody where your fortress of solitude is
pants
#dick-wolf
#kidnapping
#nu-urinal-background
#pants-solo
#salt-n-pepa
#singing
#superman
7,085 8/14/2018 time to rock out
pants: is it time for dinner yet deuce: it's time to ROCK OUT !!!!!!!!! pants: with appetizers and entrees???
deuce
pants
#appetizers
#deuce-pants
#dinner
#drunk-deuce
#entrees
#food
#punctuation
#sfw
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,086 8/15/2018 space force
deuce: thpace forthe pants: IN THPACE NOBODY CAN HEAR YOU THCREAM
deuce
pants
#caption
#closed-set
#current-events
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#mock-lisp
#space-force
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#stage-directions
#tongtyed
#uncredited-character
7,087 8/16/2018 stop making faces
pants: i can't beat off when you make that face pants: or that face pants: or that face pants: stop making faces
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#deuce-pants
#deucegrin
#faces
#static-background
#woodring-field-background
7,088 8/17/2018 happy 20th
pants
#anniversary
#birthday-strip
#gay
#gay-underwear-sex
#gay-wrestling-background
#gaydads
#single-panel
#somber-deuce
#underpants-sex
7,089 8/18/2018 scarfing it down
pants: cannibalize your own dong deuce: scarfing it down
deuce
pants
#cannibalism
#deuce-pants
#dong
#scarf
#single-panel
#woodring-stairs-background
7,090 8/19/2018 both ways
pants: i swing both ways but only one way at a time (due to the laws of physics, the laws of santa clara county) deuce: one-way valve spigot: ****nutscrape**** rt if you agree
deuce
pants
spigot
#browser
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#netscape
#physics
#santa-clara
#starbucks
#twitter
#woodring-stairs-background
7,091 8/20/2018 hope and prayer
pants: need your hopes, your prayers pants: your soiled undergarments
pants
#grab
#hopes
#pants-solo
#prayer
#undergarments
#woodring-room-background
7,092 8/21/2018 outer course
spigot: assault with intent to rape, outercourse pants: is that where i cry and ask for cab money even though cabs aren't a thing anymore
pants
spigot
#assault
#cab
#comics
#crying
#drag
#pants-spigot
#rape
#single-panel
#wonder-woman
#woodring-field-background
7,093 8/22/2018 on behalf of all teapots
deuce: I'm a little teapot pants: are you deuce: I am deuce: would a teapot lie to you pants: ya might deuce: on behalf of all teapots I am offended at your insinuation
deuce
pants
#colorbars-background
#deuce-pants
#red-background
#series
#sfw
#teapot
#test-pattern
7,094 8/23/2018 the best way to survive a street fight
pants: the best way to survive a street fight?????? gay dad weed spigot: folks a friend in need is a gay dad weed
pants
spigot
#blue-background
#dad
#folks
#gay
#gaydads
#marijuana
#pants-spigot
#single-panel
#weed
7,095 8/24/2018 a terrible game
pants: the world was too beautiful for you pants: kill your darlings pants: LEAVING RECURSIVE DEBUGGER pants: this is a terrible game
pants
#beating-off
#colorbars-background
#game
#grey-background
#pants-solo
#series
#test-pattern
#weird-pants-face
7,096 8/25/2018 right / those
deuce: pissing dicks pants: dicks that piss deuce: right deuce: those pants: making a note of it
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#nuggh
#piss
#test-pattern
#white-background
7,097 8/26/2018 1up sound
deuce: hi I'm pants from BoneQuest deuce: wanna learn how to lick dick??? (1up sound) deuce: then Dig Dug sounds for 45 minutes
deuce
#bonequest-hi-fi
#character-mismatch
#deuce-solo
#dicklicking
#dig-dug
#drunk-deuce
#nuff-said
#video-games
#woodring-stairs-background
7,098 8/27/2018 we in the industry
deuce: so we all win then pants: well somebody has to lose pants: and choke pants: on what we in the industry refer to as "my load"
deuce
pants
#choke
#deuce-pants
#industry
#lose
#mountain-background
#weird-pants-face
#win
7,099 8/28/2018 the amazing true adventures of pants from bonequest
pants: (turning the monster manual sideways to see the centerfold)
pants
#centerfold
#dungeons-and-dragons
#monster-manual
#pants-solo
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-stairs-background
7,100 8/29/2018 hooting and hollering
spigot: i dont want my neighborhood gentrified spigot: i paid extra for the hooting and hollering spigot: when all the street people disappear it will be a sad day because no more free cirque du soleil out my window
spigot
#cirque-du-soleil
#gentrification
#gentrified
#hollering
#hooting
#spigot-solo
#woodring-den-background
7,101 8/30/2018 also forbidden
pants: i am no longer allowed to ask alexa to play walking on sunshine pants: or any bananarama song pants: also forbidden: ace of bass
pants
#ace-of-base
#ace-of-bass
#alexa
#amazon
#bananarama
#forbidden
#gay
#katrina-and-the-waves
#music
#pants-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
7,102 8/31/2018 a professional wig
deuce
pants
spigot
#app
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#pretty
#woodring-field-background
7,103 9/1/2018 another saturday night
pants: t deuce also we should drive around with the top down listening to erasure deuce: fine but only after my fattening (pizza arrived)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#erasure
#fatness
#neon-grid-background
#pizza
#single-panel
7,104 9/2/2018 LITERALLY
spigot: i literally cannot believe louis ck left his house
spigot
#comedy
#king-of-the-hill
#propane
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#white-background
7,105 9/3/2018 plated
deuce: eat a bowl of dicks pants: i prefer my dicks on a plate
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#single-panel
7,106 9/4/2018 cut to
spigot: after he splorks on your face let's cut to the dog covering his eyes with his paws
spigot
#dog
#porn
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#yellow-background
7,107 9/5/2018 enough of your jocularity
pants: help my necktie is stuck in the shredder deuce: down you go pants: thank god my pantleg was stuck in the line printer deuce: drawn and quartered pants: frrrrrp frrrrrp frrrrrp frrrrrp fzzzzzZZZZzzzzp frrrrrp frrrrrp deuce: enough of your jocularity, I'm getting booze
deuce
pants
#alcohol
#booze
#deuce-pants
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-field-background
7,108 9/6/2018 dance off
pants: i challenge you to a dance-off deuce: forfeit
deuce
pants
#7up
#dancing
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#empty-auditorium-background
#sfw
#single-panel
7,109 9/7/2018 not a container nor a receptacle
pants: drink from me deuce: you are not a container nor are you a receptacle pants: yet i can hold liquid
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#piss
#piss-trough-background
7,110 9/8/2018 let that be your last battlefield
deuce: do you think humans will ever cross the Atlantic
deuce
#deuce-solo
#disney
#dongwear
#mickey-mouse
#single-panel
#somber-deuce
#star-trek
#white-background
7,111 9/9/2018 the b.d.
deuce: sorry but we're going to have to put you in the butthole dungeon pants: you can just say the b.d. and i know what you're talking about deuce: no talking in the b.d.
deuce
pants
#bubble-butt
#butthole
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#dungeon
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
7,112 9/10/2018 slide down the firepole
pants: bugs down inside my wiener deuce: wiener bugs - I know those pants: should we die fighting them or just give up deuce: quietly exit pants: slide down the firepole
deuce
pants
#bug
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#hot-sauce
#teal-background
#wiener
7,113 9/11/2018 past your expiration date
deuce: wheezing pants: are you having a pepsi day deuce: gurgle pants: are you past your expiration date deuce: hiss
deuce
pants
#compuserve
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#hi-fi
#pepsi
7,114 9/12/2018 country mouse
deuce: fabric-touching pants: leaking pants: dicklicker's holiday pants: how you want it baby pants: more of a country mouse pants: scunthorpe pants: look to your left pants: look to your right pants: money's on the bedstand now get out
deuce
pants
#country-mouse
#deuce-has-to-poo
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
7,115 9/13/2018 i don't know what's going on
pants: i'm a potted plant deuce: watering you
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#high-res
#mountain-background
#plant
#sfw
#single-panel
#stray-dot
7,116 9/14/2018 clonked in the schlong
deuce: the old schlong-clonk, you'll never trick me with that again pants: clonked in the schlong pants: please shut up
deuce
pants
#clonk
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#physical-comedy
#schlong
#woodring-field-background
7,117 9/15/2018 some kind of emissions anyway
pants: spontaneous otoacoustic emissions pants: gahhhhhhhhh mouth open wide tongue waggling
pants
#emissions
#mouth-of-pants
#neon-grid-background
#pants-solo
#title-mismatch
7,118 9/16/2018 this bucket hat will never not be cool
deuce: KILL THEM ALL spigot: nothing makes a problem go away faster than replying with a paste of my vacation responder spigot: guess he won't be back until (squints) the spring pants: this bucket hat will never not be cool
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
#sfw
7,119 9/17/2018 dropping it in the dirt
deuce: integrate me by parts pants: not real words deuce: lackadaisical cocksucking pants: barely even licking it, dropping it in the dirt pants: MAN OVERBOARD AHOOOOGA BROOOOMMPPPHH THIS IS NOT A DRILL deuce: DONG DOWN DONG DOWN
deuce
pants
#calculus
#cocksucking
#deuce-pants
#dongs
#drunk-deuce
#integration
#klaxon
#lackadaisical
#urinal-background
7,120 9/18/2018 underneath
pants: underneath all the piss and shit and dirt is............... pants: me it's me pants: pants from jer--bonequest
pants
#bonequest
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dirt
#pants-solo
#piss
#shit
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,121 9/19/2018 sorry i even mentioned it
pants: lick dick in outer space pants: actually you wouldn't enjoy that very much pants: already sorry i mentioned it
pants
#dicklicking
#pants-solo
#space-nuts-background
#weird-pants-face
7,122 9/20/2018 snoot boops
spigot: snoot boops but with a dong
spigot
#dong
#ghetto-u
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
7,123 9/21/2018 grind me to a paste
pants: do u want 2 piss on me deuce: I don't want to, but I must pants: grind me to a paste
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#ghetto-u
#grinding
#paste
#piss
#piss-trough-background
7,124 9/22/2018 sorry no
deuce: did you fuck them pants: i thought about it pants: is piss supposed to be the consistency of ketchup pants: sorry no this is a ketchup bottle pants: how did you get down there little fella pants: welp better get to tugging
deuce
pants
#catsup
#deuce-pants
#ketchup
#masturbation
#piss
#tugging
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,125 9/23/2018 up the river
pants: i'm hoping that if we do get to go up the river looking for colonel kurtz we'll be able to get out of the boat now and then
pants
#apocalypse-now
#film
#heart-of-darkness
#mangos
#movies
#pants-solo
#sfw
#single-panel
#white-background
7,126 9/24/2018 pour out a solid
spigot: i keep meaning to pour out a solid memorial to henry from 435 but i also keep drinking it
spigot
#alcohol
#buggles
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#trevor-horn
#woodring-field-background
7,127 9/25/2018 THE POPE OF LOS ANGELES
effigy: I'M THE POPE OF LOS ANGELES deuce: hail and well met, Pope
deuce
effigy
#bette-midler
#california
#deuce-effigy
#effigy
#from-a-distance
#los-angeles
#pope
#religion
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-field-background
7,128 9/26/2018 trails off, pause
pants: are you sure sucking them all off (in a row) is the right thing to do??? deuce: I never said any su-- (trails off, pause) yep pants: do i have to wear this hood deuce: only if you (trails off, pause) welcome to Wal-Mart pants: grabass.exe deuce: FeloniousSexualContact.app
deuce
pants
#cocksucking
#deuce-pants
#filename
#toilet
#urinal-background
#wal-mart
7,129 9/27/2018 cleaning zucchinis
deuce: hands pants 15 zucchinis to clean pants: glumly getting to work
deuce
pants
#bop
#clean
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#nu-urinal-background
#sfw
#zucchini
7,130 9/28/2018 bribed or coerced
spigot: it would be funny if i licked dick as a joke (like to lick a dick and then go lol) spigot: or if i licked dick by accident spigot: or if i were bribed or coerced in a manner clearly outside the definitive boundaries of state law, however contentious or debatable
spigot
#dick
#dicklicking
#joke
#moist-burlap
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
7,131 9/29/2018 i live in the swamp and eat moss
pants: i live in the swamp and eat moss (and dick) deuce: greetings moss eater (and dick eater) pants: moss and dick deuce: in that order??? pants: y
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dick
#moss
#swamp
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
#y-n
7,132 9/30/2018 smearing
pants: sound off effigy: mmm deuce: mmm yeah pants: ooh boy pants: christ mmmmm deuce: smearing
deuce
effigy
pants
#deuce-effigy-pants
#effigy
#mmm
#mmm-yeah-oooh-boy
#smearing
#woodring-field-background
7,133 10/1/2018 horse feathers
pants: getting stoned and watching the marx bros deuce: drowning you
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drowning
#grey-background
#marijuana
#marx-bros
#single-panel
#title-mismatch
#violent-disapproval
#weird-pants-face
7,134 10/2/2018 mopportunities
spigot: if she has time to lean, i'm thinking she has (at least some) time to clean spigot: i call them mopportunities
spigot
#black-background
#heart-attack
#lean
#misogyny
#sfw
#spigot-solo
7,135 10/3/2018 trouble concentrating
pants: first let me put on this dress spigot: i'm sorry i'm having trouble concentrating and i think maybe it's the dress (that dress) spigot: can we spigot: how about pants: but i spigot: let's maybe can we pause doing the lipstick spigot: i have to take this (hello) walks out of the room pants: the perfect smokey black eyeshadow, lashes to die for
pants
spigot
#makeup
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#spigot-points
#weird-pants-face
7,136 10/4/2018 Greek or Shakespearean
deuce: a piss tragedy deuce: in three piss acts deuce: Greek or Shakespearean??? unclear but there's definitely a lot of piss
deuce
#deuce-solo
#drama
#piss
#white-background
7,137 10/5/2018 10,000 dicks
spigot: t deuce would a "fag" do this: (sucks ten thousand dicks, gets aids)
spigot
#aids
#cocksucking
#deuce-spigot
#not-gay
#single-panel
#somber-deuce
#woodring-room-background
7,138 10/6/2018 crimping is not easy
spigot: t deuce are you going to the oakland ham cram spigot: I SAID T DEUCE ARE YOU GOING TO THE OAKLAND HAM CRAM spigot: t deuce either you're going to the oakland ham cram or the flea market at de anza college spigot: starts at 5:00am spigot: i will park and honk and honk until you come out with a blanket spigot: i might show up a little early spigot: t deuce i need a good deal on crimp connectors spigot: crimping is not easy
spigot
#bay-area
#crimpin-aint-easy
#de-anza-college
#ham-radio
#nu-urinal-background
#sfw
#spigot-solo
7,139 10/7/2018 honk honk honk
spigot: honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk spigot: honk honk honk hnk hn h h h h h h h h h spigot: my horn is out of air spigot: i will just honk the air bags spigot: honk honk FOOMP
spigot
#hhhhh
#honk
#nu-urinal-background
#sfw
#spigot-points
#spigot-solo
7,140 10/8/2018 tell me more
pants: piss deuce: tell me more pants: just piss that's all deuce: very well
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#piss
#urinal-background
7,141 10/9/2018 fat and tired
spigot: A staggering number of troops are fat and tired, report says spigot: blam blam blam do we have any more lemon bars
spigot
#army
#fat
#military
#spigot-solo
#tired
#urinal-background
7,142 10/10/2018 two hard computer science problems
deuce: I parked your disks with SpinRite pants: then i dumped the cache and pulled my trousers down pants: bam two hard computer science problems solved forever pants: helicoptering my dick around
deuce
pants
#computer-science
#deuce-pants
#dick
#grc
#helicoptering
#spinrite
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,143 10/11/2018 there's more to comics than superheroes
spigot: i'm a bearded 20-something reminding folks there's more to comics than superheroes spigot: "toon" in each day to fuck my face
spigot
#20-something-year-old
#bonequest-hi-fi
#comics
#face
#spigot-solo
#toon
#urinal-background
7,144 10/12/2018 hard truth
deuce: all game quests are basically the same anyway
deuce
#deuce-solo
#frog
#gaming
#quest
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
7,145 10/13/2018 sixteen dicks
spigot: :notes: ya lick sixteen dicks / and whaddya get spigot: honorable mention????? spigot: a certificate of participation ???? spigot: a teachable moment ???????? deuce: a trip to Hell (Romans 1)
deuce
spigot
#bible
#bonequest-hi-fi
#certificate-of-participation
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#dicks
#emoji
#hell
#music
#romans
#singing
#sixteen-tons
#urinal-background
7,146 10/14/2018 distressed wall-mounted sophisticated
pants: my dong: oversize tufted leather distressed wall-mounted sophisticated sweeping elegant easy-open petite bronze deuce: so many words deuce: stop wording pants: can't, must word pants: better ballgag me pants: my dong: generous evolving rare (or nonexistent!!!!!) accommodating effective non-disruptive zero downtime deuce: ballgag incoming pants: thank you sirs
deuce
pants
#ballgag
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dong
#drunk-deuce
#edited
#weird-pants-face
#white-background
#words
7,147 10/15/2018 enormous penis humiliation
spigot: ghouls, goblins, millenials deuce: minotaurs spigot: literally why is there no eph category deuce: eph spigot: talkin' enormous penis humiliation deuce: searching
deuce
spigot
#acronym
#deuce-spigot
#eph
#millennials
#white-background
7,148 10/16/2018 the all-new 2018 toyota shitbox
pants: which should i buy, a 2016 toyota shitbox or a 2010 ford fagface deuce: a 2018 Kia Sorrento
deuce
pants
#cars
#deuce-pants
#kia
#single-panel
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,149 10/17/2018 pinging and swinging
spigot: HOW CAN I MANAGE THE NET WHEN I'M SCRAMBLING AROUND TRYING TO MANAGE ALL THESE DICKS spigot: SEEKING A SOLUTION spigot: PINGING AND SWINGING AND TRYING TO STUFF PEOPLE IN THE STALL (IT'S 5PM)
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dicks
#spigot-solo
#ssl
#urinal-background
7,150 10/18/2018 idkfa
pants: where's the key binding to dodge cum????????// deuce: `idkfa`
deuce
pants
#cloud
#cum
#cum-dodging
#deuce-pants
#doom
#single-panel
#urinal-background
7,151 10/19/2018 blow a load on my face
spigot: XXXX blow a load on my face hooman
spigot
#cat
#emoji
#jizz
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
7,152 10/20/2018 our national discourse
deuce: I really wish you would take Twitter more seriously pants: i am sorry deuce: it's vitally important to our national discourse and (fart sounds for 20 minutes)
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#farts
#politics
#twitter
#urinal-background
7,153 10/21/2018 your beautiful new home
deuce: t pants this is your new home pants: it's beautiful spigot: i like the skylight
deuce
pants
spigot
#cardboard-box
#deuce-pants-spigot
#photo
#sfw
#spigot-points
#urinal-background
7,154 10/22/2018 obviously ridiculous reading glasses
deuce: at the weed store do they sell (checks script, obviously ridiculous reading glasses) weed pants: i sure hope so pants: the last time it was just weird gay porn and gross sex toys and booths for watching videos deuce: can't help but try again!!!
deuce
pants
#behind-the-scenes
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#marijuana
#weed
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
7,155 10/23/2018 faith in your faith
pants: i wonder if i'm fat enough to hold down the fort deuce: I have faith in your faith
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fatness
#mountain-background
#sfw
#single-panel
#weird-pants-face
7,156 10/24/2018 one more time
net: T DEUCE I'M ONLY GOING TO TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME: I DICK, YOU LICK deuce: LET US SPURT net: DO YOU AGREE TO THE GUIDELINES deuce: THE DEFENSE STIPULATES THAT IT HURTS net: WE HAVE NO DEAL deuce: FFFF
deuce
net
#deuce-net
#dicklicking
#negotiations
#net
#urinal-background
7,157 10/25/2018 150 years
spigot: we knew about black dongs and z-shaped dongs spigot: but 150 years had to elapse before stephen hawking understood black, z-shaped dongs deuce: then black, Z-shaped dong radiation deuce: and finally with the help of Bekenstein black, Z-shaped dong entropy spigot: i had to look up the dates of their respective tenures spigot: cause i was going to say it took 10,000 years deuce: don't be silly that's longer than the age of the Earth spigot: or as popeye would say .. the age of the oith
deuce
spigot
#astrophysics
#creationism
#deuce-spigot
#dongs
#hospital-background
#jacob-bekenstein
#popeye
#spigot-points
#stephen-hawking
7,158 10/26/2018 SOMETHING OBSTRUCTING
deuce: THERE SEEMS TO BE SOMETHING OBSTRUCTING MY BREATHING PASSAGE deuce: HHHHHHH HHHHHHHH deuce: SSSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSS deuce: PASSING OUT deuce: DIZZY deuce: CANT deuce: BREATHE pants: JUST BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
deuce
pants
#black-background
#bonequest-hi-fi
#choking
#crow
#deuce-pants
#hhhhh
#sfw
7,159 10/27/2018 a hard rule
pants: do women have dicks or is that just dudes deuce: mostly pants: is it a hard rule or are we talking notable exceptions deuce: unclear
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#ts
#women
#woodring-room-background
7,160 10/28/2018 the twitterverse
deuce: I call it the twitterverse deuce: also I gargle cocks as if they were mouthwash
deuce
#cocks
#deuce-solo
#grey-background
#twitter
7,161 10/29/2018 dick pics
spigot: dick pics are like boob pics but for ****her***
spigot
#asterisks
#dick-pics
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
7,162 10/30/2018 don't start
spigot: PUNCH ME IN THE SACK deuce: DON'T START WITH ME SIR
deuce
spigot
#black-background
#cocksucking-noises
#deuce-spigot
#single-panel
#sir
7,163 10/31/2018 dinner plans
deuce: fisting pants: tri-tip + little white potatoes deuce: I'm up for whatever (as long as there's tri-tip) pants: wasn't sure what else to get deuce: no tri-tip, I don't put out pants: oh and a big-ass onion
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fisting
#food
#frog
#piss-trough-background
#tri-tip
7,164 11/1/2018 dear fags
pants: Dear Fags, pants: It's me again. pants: Y'all are still sleeping. pants: It's like I never left or stood over you beating off. pants: Love, pants
pants
#beating-off
#blue-background
#letter
#love-pants
#pants-solo
#sleep
#weird-pants-face
7,165 11/2/2018 to make it stay big
pants: t spigot sometimes i see how long i can shake the cursor to make it stay big spigot: my record is four days
pants
spigot
#macintosh
#macos
#mouse-cursor
#nu-urinal-background
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#single-panel
7,166 11/3/2018 a disturbing pattern
pants: there's a disturbing pattern in my trousers you should totally call scully and investigate deuce: he'll just get distracted with aliens and shit pants: you're thinking mulder, scully is the one who founded apple computers pants: boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys boys
deuce
pants
#apple
#boys
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#mousehole
#repetition
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
#x-files
7,167 11/4/2018 the girth years
spigot: the scope and breadth of the investigation spigot: what about the girth ??????? spigot: how many girth years in diameter deuce: it's like I don't know you anymore
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dimensional-analysis
#drunk-deuce
#girth
#investigation
#sfw
#woodring-field-background
7,168 11/5/2018 meal prep
pants: MILK EGGS HAM I'LL EAT IT ALL deuce: PEANUTS POPCORN PRESENTS
deuce
pants
#breakfast
#deuce-pants
#fatness
#food
#high-res
#peanuts-popcorn-presents
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-den-background
7,169 11/6/2018 and then a big ker-chonk
spigot: okay hitting STOP and then rewinding a few milliseconds purely by feel and then a big ker-chonk with both PLAY and the orange RECORD spigot: MOM SHUT **UP** I AM RECORDING THE KTEH PLEDGE BREAKS spigot: fucking BITCH
spigot
#neon-grid-background
#pbs
#pledge
#pledge-break
#spigot-solo
#vcr
7,170 11/7/2018 totally fine
spigot: what we've learned is that it's totally fine to drink all day as long as you take a nap in the late afternoon / early evening
spigot
#alcohol
#hi-fi
#high-res
#naps
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
7,171 11/8/2018 ten dicks across roughly 8 hours
spigot: i'm thinking ten dicks across roughly 8 hours is not a ratio to write home about pants: the cyber
pants
spigot
#cyber
#dicks
#empty-auditorium-background
#pants-spigot
#single-panel
7,172 11/9/2018 that makes me uncomfortable
pants: AbstractQueueable looks like AbstractQueerable and that makes me uncomfortable deuce: all over an AbstractSquirtable
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#high-res
#java
#single-panel
#urinal-background
7,173 11/10/2018 drawing those eyebrows
pants: drawing eyebrows on my wiener deuce: watching eyebrows being drawn on your wiener pants: holding a sharpie in my fist pants: drawing those eyebrows deuce: turns out the pen really is mightier than the dong pants: the dong is crying pants: or maybe pissing pants: yeah that's piss pants: sorry about all the piss deuce: you were supposed to draw eyebrows, not tattoo tears pants: each teardrop represents a dude i jacked off in county jail
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dong
#jail
#pen
#piss
#sharpie
#weird-pants-face
#white-background
#wiener
7,174 11/11/2018 jizz me up
spigot: APPEARS IN A POOFY CLOUD OF GAY FATNESS spigot: JIZZ ME UP PEOPLE
spigot
#blank-panel
#caption
#fatness
#jizz
#poofy-cloud-of-gay-fatness
#spigot-solo
#white-background
7,175 11/12/2018 WELCOME TO BONEQUEST
deuce: I JACK OFF COPS
deuce
#black-background
#blue-balls-matter
#cops
#deuce-solo
#high-res
#jacking-off
#jerking
#police
#single-panel
7,176 11/13/2018 on my own terms
spigot: licking dick on my own terms!!!!! and at orchard supply
spigot
#dicklicking
#frog
#madness
#orchard-supply-hardware
#self-actualization
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
7,177 11/14/2018 spicy boneless wings from round table
pants: like a goat i eat garbage (spicy boneless wings from round table) deuce: hot garbage pants: why do i feel ill pants: oh right all the garbage pants: BIGGER DICKS STILL
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#food
#garbage
#goats
#huffy-pants
#round-table
#woodring-stairs-background
7,178 11/15/2018 but then!!!!!!!
pants: i was totally going to suck a dick but then i saw a moth and now i'm scared
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cocksucking
#dick
#high-res
#moth
#pants-solo
#single-panel
#suck
#white-background
7,179 11/16/2018 a class act
deuce: I'LL TAKE MY SWEET TIME THANK YOU pants: GETTIN' AROUND TO GETTIN' AROUND pants: t deuce my sweater has patches on the elbows deuce: you are a class act deuce: a real dame
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#nu-urinal-background
#sfw
#weird-pants-face
7,180 11/17/2018 WHATEVER IT IS THAT YOU DO
pants: WILLING TO POP AND PUSH pants: TO SHIFT AND UNSHIFT pants: MEET JOE BALLS pants: SMELL ME pants: FUCKING SMELL ME pants: HYUNDAI pants: I WILL WANK IT AND I WONDER WHY AND I WILL GO BACK TO WANKING IT pants: THAT IS WHY YOU SHOULD VOTE FOR ME (OR WHATEVER IT IS THAT YOU DO)
pants
#funloving-nonsense
#pants-solo
#politics
#unix
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
7,181 11/18/2018 all of this is terrible
pants: t deuce it's not gay if you're trying to help a friend deuce: it's not gay at all if he asks deuce: or indirectly suggests deuce: or winks pants: also not gay if you're simply trying to make the wiener cleaner deuce: or ... ???????? deuce: just helping your fellow man deuce: also that's gross pants: all of this is terrible pants: let's start over pants: I LICK DICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: definitely worse deuce: but more honest??? pants: somewhat
deuce
pants
#be-gay-with-me
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#honesty
#not-gay
#weird-pants-face
#wiener
7,182 11/19/2018 my relapse
deuce: my kerfuffle has turned into an imbroglio deuce: also my relapse has turned into a prolapse pants: jack off heaven
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#jack-off-heaven
#kerfuffle
#prolapse
#vocabulary
7,183 11/20/2018 operation locker
pants: gimme some of that operation locker pants: i wanna throw grenades through a hole for 40 minutes
pants
#battlefield-4
#grenade
#pants-solo
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
7,184 11/21/2018 help me put on this tie
pants: making a thanksgiving turkey, tracing fingers onto construction paper pants: sucking my own dick pants: never cutting the turkey out, never hanging it on the wall, just working my own hog pants: the turkey needs a little eye and a little smiling mouth??????? too bad giving head to myself deuce: did you mean your weird, meaty hands with their little stubby fingers pants: the very same (smiling, practically beaming) pants: so happy you noticed pants: help me put on this tie
deuce
pants
#autofellatio
#deuce-pants
#dick
#sucking
#thanksgiving
#turkey
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-field-background
7,185 11/22/2018 thanksgiving 2018
deuce: I AM ALL READY FOR HUGE FAT AMOUNTS OF DICKSUCKING TOMORROW deuce: what do you mean turkey
deuce
#bait-and-switch
#cocksucking
#deuce-solo
#deucegrin
#dicks
#thanksgiving
#title-mismatch
#turkey
#urinal-background
7,186 11/23/2018 PIGGYBACK
deuce: HUMPING VS. HUMPED spigot: THREE COINS IN A FOUNTAIN pants: PIGGYBACK
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#high-res
#mountain-background
#single-panel
7,187 11/24/2018 who shaved deuce 2018
deuce: why did you shave me you bastard pants: you had knots in your fur deuce: well fuck you anyway pants: fuck me indeed deuce: whoops, forgot I've been shaved, pretty sure this is the way I've always been pants: better hide your boner
deuce
pants
#boner
#deuce-pants
#fuck
#shaving
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
7,188 11/25/2018 bow down and worship me
pants: bow down and worship me deuce: death first pants: would sir care to be dumped in a pit with others deuce: sure
deuce
pants
#death
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#sfw
#urinal-background
#would-sir
7,189 11/26/2018 GO BACK TO RUSSIA
pants: GO BACK TO RUSSIA spigot: TERRORIST spigot: oh, me, okay (closing door) spigot: sorry what spigot: thought you said something (closing door)
pants
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#coy-pants
#kitty
#pants-spigot
#russia
#sfw
#white-background
7,190 11/27/2018 then who
deuce: folks I don't know about you but *I* sure don't lick dick pants: well somebody did deuce: sure wasn't me
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#folks
#not-gay
#weird-pants-face
#whodunit
#woodring-field-background
7,191 11/28/2018 expanding the universe itself
pants: pissing deuce: show me pants: can't deuce: must pants: rubber band around wiener, floomping like balloon, expanding the universe itself deuce: you are dark energy
deuce
pants
#cheese
#coy-pants
#dark-energy
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#foomph
#piss
#space-nuts
#space-nuts-background
#tongtyed
#uncredited-character
7,192 11/29/2018 the factory puzzle
pants: OKAY HERE'S HOW TO SOLVE THE FACTORY PUZZLE pants: YOU GO INTO THE HATCH AND I'LL CLOSE IT THEN I'LL PRESS THE BUTTON AND WE'LL WAIT FOR THE MACHINE TO DO ITS THING AND WHEN IT FINISHES, GRAB THE FOAM AND I'LL OPEN THE HATCH TO LET YOU OUT spigot: NO deuce: FUCK YOU
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#fuck-you
#infocom
#invisiclues
#mousehole
#puzzle
#vomit
#woodring-room-background
7,193 11/30/2018 check this shit out
deuce: hated it pants: check this shit out (beats off)
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#deuce-pants
#high-res
#single-panel
#white-background
7,194 12/1/2018 a single random digit
deuce: wh owfklh fsl dhfkhk6hfsklf hsklfhs pants: that's what i tried to tell them deuce: keyboard banging is always 100% funnier with a single random digit thrown in there deuce: 300% funnier deuce: 900 dicks at an exchange rate of one dick per prick is 900 pricks
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#exchange-rate
#keyboard-banging
#nu-urinal-background
#pricks
7,195 12/2/2018 did i mention???????
spigot: DID I MENTION I HAVE CHOPSTICKS FOR LEGS spigot: THAT'S OUTRAGEOUS
spigot
#chopsticks-for-legs
#outrageous
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
7,196 12/3/2018 that sagging air mattress
pants: all men are pervs deuce: that's untrue and to prove it I'm going to rub my dick in your face spigot: lol at that sagging air mattress pants: cross-referencing and sorting all the times i groped on things, got groped on
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#groping
#men
#spigot-points
#white-background
7,197 12/4/2018 DOPPLER RADAR
pants: DOPPLER RADAR IN THE MENS ROOM deuce: I AM SEEING THEM COMING (BLUE) AND GOING (RED) deuce: ALSO I WOULD LIKE A MINT FOR MY TROUBLE pants: MY BONG IS HUGGING ME AND LOVING ME
deuce
pants
#bi-curious
#blueshift
#bong
#deuce-pants
#doppler-effect
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#marijuana
#redshift
7,198 12/5/2018 far cry 6
pants: i hope far cry 6 takes place in the castro district pants: am i adorbs deuce: you are godlike pants: that is not adorbs tho
deuce
pants
#adorbs
#bay-area
#deuce-pants
#far-cry
#sfw
#weird-pants-face
#white-background
7,199 12/6/2018 a wrong turn
pants: is this beatoff alley or did i take a wrong turn again deuce: this is the fisting department pants: tsk
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#caption
#deuce-pants
#fisting
#white-background
7,200 12/7/2018 get you some religion
pants: get you some religion pants: should i drown all others pants: powers of deduction tell me i'm fat pants: killing one hundred Philistines deuce: murder the peasants pants: all those bodies
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fat
#neon-grid-background
#religion
#sfw
#violence
#weird-pants-face
7,201 12/8/2018 up and down with lighter fluid
spigot: really not sure i've ever encountered a child or a baby who doesn't belong in a cage spigot: i mean one of those cages isis squirts up and down with lighter fluid
spigot
#baby
#cage
#fire
#isis
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
7,202 12/9/2018 greentext
spigot: > be me spigot: > lick dick
spigot
#4chan
#dicklicking
#greentext
#mousehole
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
7,203 12/10/2018 from a man to a butterfly
pants: can i transition from a man to a butterfly (is that the law) deuce: what are your pronouns pants: SUCK AND FUCK ROOM
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#pronouns
#trans
#woodring-stairs-background
7,204 12/11/2018 a little kitchy
pants: why don't you beat me off jazz-style (free form but not out of bounds) deuce: what about blues-style or even swing-style pants: seems a little kitchy
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#blues
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#jazz
#swing
#typo
#woodring-field-background
7,205 12/12/2018 how to calculate a tip
spigot: the better the tip i leave, the gayer myself ***and*** my party ????? deuce: 15%: probably gay deuce: 16%: likely gay deuce: 17%: very likely gay deuce: 18%: almost certainly deuce: 19%: gay deuce: 20+%: way gay
deuce
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-spigot
#gay
#woodring-stairs-background
7,206 12/13/2018 when i ring the little bell
pants: t deuce when i ring the little bell i expect you to appear at my bedside asking me what i want deuce: sorry, I'm on break pants: shitting together, holding hands, squeezing your fingers tight when i strain pants: what's your pin number
deuce
pants
#a-love-story
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#pin
#shit
7,207 12/14/2018 hot for teacher
spigot: IS ANYONE HERE HOT FOR TEACHER?!?!?!? JUST MOI?!?!?! deuce: T SPIGOT YOU HAVE BEEN SMOKING WAY TOO MUCH POT spigot: TO EASE THE CRUSHING PAIN OF MODERN LIFE deuce: I ON THE OTHER HAND DRINK TO FEEL AN INFLATED SENSE OF SELF-ESTEEM
deuce
spigot
#addiction
#alcohol
#david-lee-roth
#deuce-spigot
#irl-powerword
#marijuana
#mountain-background
7,208 12/15/2018 a lot of work
pants: i was thinking about drowning myself but i can't do it alone pants: need you to stand on my neck pants: also gonna need a lot of piss pants: i'll get the u-haul and you start lugging jugs down to the first floor pants: we're gonna do this deuce: this sounds like a lot of work pants: but think of the ratings
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#piss
#ratings
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
7,209 12/16/2018 don't do that
pants: KAFF KAFF KAFF deuce: DON'T DO THAT YOU'RE ONLY DAMAGING YOUR BALLS pants: THEY ARE FINE pants: RIGHT BOYS???? pants: BOYS ????? HELLO ????????? pants: i will be right back
deuce
pants
#ball-damage
#balls
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#kaff
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
7,210 12/17/2018 DOPE MY STONISH MOCKERY
spigot: WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DOPE MY STONISH MOCKERY spigot: I MEAN spigot: WHAT WAS THE QUESTION
spigot
#spigot-solo
#stoned
#woodring-stairs-background
7,211 12/18/2018 the blacker the better
dick: tectonic plates are a bunch of pussies pants: crisp clean refreshing gayballs dick: the blacker the better
dick
pants
#dick
#dick-pants
#gayballs
#hospital-background
7,212 12/19/2018 big industrial strength black paper clips
deuce: have you ever noticed that when you clamp your dick with a clothespin it hurts???? and other deep thoughts pants: try a rubber band deuce: maybe one of those big industrial strength black paper clips??? pants: yessssss
deuce
pants
#clamping
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#dick
#funeral
#photo-background
#weird-pants-face
7,213 12/20/2018 apparat
pants: @spigot i don't like the @spigot designator i prefer t spigot spigot: @pants 'apparat' (breaking bad song) reminds me of 'the xx' who opened for chemical bros deuce: +pants this one's even worse (thanks Google+)
deuce
pants
spigot
#breaking-bad
#chemical-brothers
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#google
#google-plus
#nuggh
#red-background
#sand
#sfw
#social-media
#spigot-points
#twitter
#weird-pants-face
7,214 12/21/2018 baseballs
deuce: you know what's great about baseball???? all the players eventually die
deuce
#deuce-solo
#mortality
#sfw
#single-panel
#sports
#urinal-background
7,215 12/22/2018 cash-ay
spigot: when ozone hands me the pipe. has the bowl been 'cached' or 'cashed' deuce: cache pronounced "cash-ay" spigot: t deuce shut up pants: in my defense i was quite drunk
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drugs
#enya
#marijuana
#pipe
#spigot-points
#urinal-background
#vocabulary
7,216 12/23/2018 a 5-biter
pants: i'm going to wear a tie and start eating it until my neck breaks pants: hompth hompth hompth hompth hompth criiiick pants: it's a 5-bite tie pants: i could do it in 4 but i don't want to seem thirsty
pants
#homph
#newmans-own
#pants-solo
#physical-comedy
#sfw
#tie
#woodring-stairs-background
7,217 12/24/2018 squirting piss onto the wainscoting
pants: consternation, furrowed brows while i crabwalk down the hall, squirting piss onto the wainscoting
pants
#god
#nonviolent-disapproval
#pants-solo
#piss
#single-panel
#wainscoting
#woodring-room-background
7,218 12/25/2018 merry christmas 2018
deuce: BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN STOLEN VALOR BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN BLOCKCHAIN
deuce
#black-background
#blockchain
#bonequest-hi-fi
#christmas
#christmas-tree-lights
#deuce-solo
#repetition
#sfw
#single-panel
7,219 12/26/2018 off on a rant here
spigot: folks I don't want to get off on a rant here . . . . . . . . . . . . spigot: . . . . . . . so I'll just be quiet for the remainder of the afternoon / early evening
spigot
#folks
#politeness
#quiet
#rant
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
7,220 12/27/2018 no ass in the whole world
pants: There's no ass in the whole world like a young Jewish girl who's hooking pants: i'm not speaking fucking chinese am i pants: an unlicked dick has the same number of atoms as a licked dick (stoney-faced asberger's stare)
pants
#aspergers
#comics
#jews
#movie-quote
#pants-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
7,221 12/28/2018 how far will this desperate father go
spigot: how far will this desperate father go to protect his family spigot: i can't reach the remote
spigot
#mousehole
#sfw
#spigot-points
#spigot-solo
#television
#woodring-room-background
7,222 12/29/2018 a new prime number
pants: a new prime number???????? i bet it's 17
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#math
#prime
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-room-background
7,223 12/30/2018 for henceforth
pants: REJOICE DEATH IS NOT THE END deuce: FOR HENCEFORTH WE SHALL BE PERFECT pants: HENCEFORTH I WIMPER NO MORE, POSTPONE NO MORE, NEED NOTHING deuce: EVERYBODY DANCE NOW pants: YOU WANT TO MAKE FLOWERS TODAY deuce: THIS IS HOW THE WORLD ENDS: slightly gay
deuce
pants
#death
#deuce-pants
#gay
#mortality
#poetry
#true-detective
#ts-eliot
#typo
#weird-pants-face
#whitman
#woodring-den-background
7,224 12/31/2018 not really asking
deuce: wanna touch my junk deuce: okay I'm not really asking
deuce
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#gay
#junk
#mousehole
#woodring-room-background

EPISODES: 2018

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