spigot: there has got to be a way I can send dick pics to my large-screen google home hub in the kitchen while the book club is over spigot: i'm thinkin' ken burns effect spigot: if I could suck my own dick I'd never leave the house but also I never leave the house so . . . . . . let's hurry it up women of STEM

pants: YOU SIMPLY MUST AGREE TO BE GAY WITH ME pants: I INSIST THAT WE CLIMB INTO THE DICK PIT AND DO THE JOB RIGHT pants: FIRST I WILL CLIMB INTO THE DUMBWAITER AND YOU WILL LOWER ME DOWN pants: THIS IS THE BIG TIME AND YOU ARE BLOCKING PROGRESS pants: I DEMAND ACCESS TO THE KINGDOM HLUAHGLUAHLUAG

atandt: DICKS atandt: ANY WAY YOU SPELL IT atandt: I LOVE 'EM atandt: NO MATTER HOW YOU CONJUGATE IT atandt: I LOVE DICK atandt: NO MATTER WHICH OF THE SEVEN DWARFS YOU HAPPEN TO BE atandt: I LOVE DICK deuce: DUDE ARE YOU A FAG OR WHAT

deuce: HOLD ME pants: I CANNOT GET MY ARMS AROUND YOU deuce: I AM FAT YES pants: AND I HAVE SHORT LITTLE ARMS YES pants: YOUR PEAR-SHAPE AND MY USELESS APPENDAGES MAKE US THE PERFECT DICK TRACY BAD GUYS deuce: HOLD ME

pants: CAN WE USE AI TO GENERATE NEW BRISCOE/CURTIS EPISODES OF LAW & ORDER deuce: I deuce: I, UH deuce: I WOULD LIKE THAT VERY MUCH

pants: CAN WE BOTH LIKE DICK pants: THAT'S RIGHT: LIKE pants: AS IN: WE WILL SIT AROUND AND APPRECIATE DICK pants: (WRITE POEMS, SING SONGS, ETC.) deuce: I DON'T KNOW SOUNDS A LITTLE QUEER TO ME deuce: THE JOKE THERE BEING THAT ACTUALLY SUCKING, LICKING DICK, ETC. IS PERFECTLY STRAIGHT deuce: BUT SITTING AROUND AND WRITING POETRY AND SONGS ABOUT DICK IS TOTALLY GAY deuce: APPLAUSE pants: I WILL BE GAY FOR UNDER A DOLLAR

spigot: HUFFING, PUFFING pants: I GUESS WE SHOULD HAVE JACKED HIM OFF HUH spigot: COME BACK AND LICK DICK WITH ME spigot: I MEAN PRICK WITH ME

deuce: I WANT CLARIFICATION ON MY DICKLICKING pants: I AM GOING TO LICK YOUR DICK FROM 7:10 TO 7:14 AT WHICH POINT YOU WILL GUM UP THE WORKS AND TIP ME A WOODEN NICKEL WHICH I WILL PROMPTLY EAT deuce: DONE deuce: AND I MEAN DONE

pants: TURN ON YOUR HEARTLIGHT pants: LET IT SHINE WHEREVER YOU GO pants: LET IT MAKE A HAPPY GLOW AND FOR GOD'S SAKE LET ME LICK YOUR DICK (CHORUS)

deuce: DICKS pants: WAS RE: DICKS

pants: DICKS pants: (THEY BITE) pants: THAT'S WHY YOU HAVE TO CHOMP THE HEAD OFF FIRST deuce: REALLY

pants: OF COURSE YOU'RE LEFT WITH SPURTING BLOOD pants: FROM THE HEADLESS DICK deuce: I SEE pants: BUT IF YOU START AT THE BALLS END YOU STAND A CHANCE OF BEING BADLY BITTEN deuce: COULD YOU PLEASE GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BALLS

pants: A BIG DUMB BONER BEGAN TO POKE pants: A DONG IN A BONG IN A DONG IN A BONG IN A DONG IN MY FUCKING FACE pants: SPLUTTERY SPURT ON MY ROBERT GRAHAM SHIRT pants: DICKS spigot: PRICKS spigot: DID YOU FILL UP YOUR NEW XMAS SOCKS WITH DIARRHEA ??? pants: DICKS spigot: PRICKS spigot: DO YOU CALL YOUR WIFE T-MOBILE BECAUSE OF HER UNLIMITED TALK ??? pants: DICKS spigot: PRICKS spigot: WHEN I SAY FRASIER DO YOU THINK GAYSIER??? pants: DICKS spigot: PRICKS spigot: DO MEN HAVE "TROUBLE" LOCATING THE CLITORIS OR DO WE MAYBE NOT CARE WHERE IT IS pants: DICKS!!! I MEAN PRICKS!!!! pants: BOTH???? spigot: NOT EVEN CLOSE TO BASELINE pants: I'M A REPLI ***CAN'T***

deuce: ALSO DICKS uncredited woman: OH YES, THE DICKS ARE ENDLESSLY REFRESHING TWITTER uncredited woman: DICKS WHO WISH THEY'D BROUGHT A BOOK uncredited woman: DICKS ABANDONING LINE ETIQUETTE AND EDGING CLOSER TO THE DOOR AND FINALLY BECOMING A DISORGANIZED MOB OF DICKS

uncredited woman: SOME OF THE DICKS LACK PROPER IDENTIFICATION uncredited woman: DICKS IN RIOT GEAR deuce: DICKS BEING STRANGE

net: DICKS N STUFF net: STUFF'N DICKS

uncredited woman: DICKS ON PARADE deuce: THE SAME DICKS OR DIFFERENT DICKS uncredited woman: A VARIETY OF DICKS, SOME FAMILIAR AND SOME COMPLETELY NEW uncredited woman: DICKS FROM OUT OF TOWN

deuce: WAS HARAMBE THE DUDE OR THE pants: HE WAS THE KING WHO CUT BABIES IN HALF pants: NOT TO SOLVE DISPUTES OR ANYTHING, HE JUST LOVED CHOPPING STUFF UP deuce: NO THAT WAS NELSON MANDELA pants: ON EARTH 353 SURE BUT HERE ON 354 WE [HEAD CHOPPED OFF] deuce: WHO GAVE HIS NAME TO THE GAME MANCALA deuce: AND MANDALAY BAY pants: WHICH WE KNOW TODAY AS A MINT JULIP [HEAD CHOPPED OFF AGAIN]

uncredited woman: FOREIGN DICKS WITH STRANGE WAYS uncredited woman: COMFORTING DICK-NEXT-DOOR TYPE DICKS uncredited woman: EXOTIC DICKS FROM FARAWAY LANDS deuce: DICKS THAT NOBODY LOVED

uncredited woman: DICKS WITH TROUBLED PASTS uncredited woman: DICKS WORKING THEIR WAY THROUGH COLLEGE, DICKS TRYING TO MAKE SOMETHING OF THEIR LIVES uncredited woman: SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED DICKS, GETTING DRESSED UP TO GO OUT TONIGHT deuce: DICKS THAT ARE ONLY POKING AND PRODDING TO PAY FOR THEIR COLLEGE TUITION

uncredited woman: A MULTITUDE OF DICKS uncredited woman: WAITING THEIR TURN IN AN ORDERLY QUEUE deuce: ONE OR MORE DICKS uncredited woman: DICKS PATIENTLY CHECKING THEIR WATCHES deuce: DICKS LOOKING AT THEIR SMARTPHONES, PRETENDING LIKE THEY'RE TALKING TO FRIENDS

deuce: ENUMERATE THE DICKS pants: THEY WON'T HOLD STILL!!! THEY HOP FROM THE END OF THE LINE TO THE START AND WEAR FAKE BEARDS AND I COUNT THEM TWICE deuce: YOU NEED SOME SORT OF IBUTTON 1-WIRE SOLUTION pants: OR A HEAVY MALLET pants: I DRAW HAPPY FACES ON THEM BUT EVENTUALLY THEY RUB IT OFF AND A FEW HOURS LATER THEY'RE ALL HI I'M A TOTALLY DIFFERENT DICK deuce: HOLD ON A SECOND I'M BLOGGING ABOUT MY IPOD

uncredited woman: LIKE FLAPPY BIRD BUT FOR DICKS deuce: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!!!! : Notice: "pants" is out sick this week. His part will be played by his understudy deuce: WAIT

uncredited woman: DICKS deuce: EXACTLY uncredited woman: I'M GLAD WE AGREE

pants: DICKS^3 pants: THEY ARE PROBLEMATIC pants: GHLUAGHLAHGAG A FOUL-TASTING MEDICINE INDEED HALUGHLAUGHLUAG

spigot: DID I MENTION I LICK DICK spigot: LET. THAT. SINK. IN.

net: DID I MENTION I'M GOING TO LEARN ESPERANTUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH deuce: T NET ARE YOU REALLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH

spigot: DID I MENTION I HAVE CHOPSTICKS FOR LEGS spigot: THAT'S OUTRAGEOUS

spigot: *diarrhea* spigot: did i spell that right spigot: fantastic

spigot: MY BONER'S FLOATING UP TO HEAVEN deuce: T SPIGOT DID IT DIE spigot: IT JUST THINKS THERE ARE MORE FAGS AND STALLS IN HEAVEN THEN HERE LOCKED AND BOUND AMONG THE MORTAL COILS OF EARTH spigot: I.E. THE SUCKING atandt: WETNURSE PLZ

spigot: MY BONER'S FLOATING UP TO HEAVEN deuce: T SPIGOT DID IT DIE spigot: IT JUST THINKS THERE ARE MORE FAGS AND STALLS IN HEAVEN THEN HERE LOCKED AND BOUND AMONG THE MORTAL COILS OF EARTH spigot: (I.E. THE SUCKING)

spigot: DID YOU MEAN: BONNER FARM spigot: NO I DID NOT

spigot: FOLKS IS THERE ANYTHING MORE BORING THAN A CHEERLEADER spigot: I AM CHOKING YOU WITH YOUR PLAID SKIRT spigot: T PANTS YOU DID OR DID NOT TAPE FELICITY

pants: DID WE GET IT RIGHT net: I THINK SO pants: GREAT - THAT'S ONE FOR THE GODDAMN BOOKS THEN pants: FORWARD MARRRRRRRRCH

deuce: DID YOU FALL IN LOVE spigot: I FELL IN THE JOHN

deuce: I'M NOT SEXIST IT'S JUST THAT ALL WOMEN ARE INFERIOR

spigot: I'LL BET THE BANANAS SOMETIMES DID DIARRHEA IN THEIR PAJAMAS spigot: DO FOLKS KNOW IF YOU CHOP OFF A PENIS YOU CAN STILL SUCK IT spigot: IT DOESN'T MAGICALLY REDUCE ITS POWERS spigot: WE CAN STILL SERVE THIS

atandt: I'LL PUT THE WHOLE SYSTEM ON TRIAL pants: YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH atandt: I'M MAD AS HELL AND NOT GOING TO TAKE IT ANYMORE ??? pants: YOU'RE ALL OUT OF ORDER atandt: BIG WHEEL KEEPS ON TURNING pants: I WON'T GO DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT BLABAHAB ALL RIGHT FINE HAULGBULAHABG

spigot: SPLURK SPLORT spigot: SORRY DID YOU SAY 'NUT IN YOUR MOUTH' OR 'NOT IN YOUR MOUTH' spigot: SPLOP SPLOSH

spigot: ***GROUNDS*** FOR DIVORCE!!!!!! A HILARIOUS WEB-COMIC ALL ABOUT COFFEE AND WIFE-BEATING pants: USING AN OLD BOX-OF-WINE TO HOLD MY 5 1/4" DISKETTES pants: COFFEE IN ONE HAND AND COMIC BOOKS IN THE OTHER pants: I WILL BEAT YOU OFF OR DIE TRYING

deuce: WHY IS IT WHEN I HIT ^R THAT ZSH CALLS ME A COCKSUCKER ??? pants: I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM WITH MY XML PARSER: IT SAYS I'M A PEDOPHILE AND THEN QUITS WITH DIE pants: I WISH IT WOULDN'T CALL DIE BECAUSE I'M TRYING TO GET WORK DONE deuce: WHY DOES UNIX HAVE TO BE SO MEAN

pants: T DEUCE YOU'RE GOING TO HELL WITH ME pants: T DEUCE THAT IS TO SAY WE'RE BOTH GOING TO HELL BUT WE MIGHT HAVE DIFFERENT DEPARTURE DATES pants: UNLESS WE DRIVE AROUND THE HILLS FAST AND DRUNK THEN THERE'S A GOOD CHANGE WE CAN ACTUALLY GET ON THE SAME FLIGHT WHICH WOULD BE FUN, WE COULD HOOK UP OUR GAMEBOYS

deuce: I'M TOM HANKS IN BACHELOR PARTY deuce: DIFFERENT TOM HANKS pants: WHAT ABOUT JOE VS. THE VOLCANO pants: BIG deuce: NOT RESPONDING TO YOU ANYMORE

spigot: STILL SO PISSED BORDER PATROL ASKED IF I WAS TRANSPORTING ANY FRUITS OR VEGETABLES pants: MY RAP NAME IS SIR WIPESALOT effigy: CUT TO EVERYONE TOASTING WITH WATER ON THE BRIDGE OF THE YAMATO dick: NOT ONE OF YOU HAS ASKED ME ABOUT MY NEW KLEEN KANTEEN deuce: DO YOU WISH TO CONTINUE N / NO / NEVER :

spigot: can't wait for corona to be over so i can take these condoms off spigot: getting difficult to tinkle in this expanding balloon of urine

deuce: DIPPY DAPPY atandt: STOP WITH THE GAY TALK atandt: START WITH THE GAY

deuce: T PANTS I AM DIG DUG AND I AM GOING TO INFLATE YOU UNTIL YOU POP net: INSERT HOSE HERE deuce: ARE YOU FRYGAR ?!?! pants: T DEUCE I WOULD LIKE THAT (ALSO I AM A BLUE GHOST SO CHOMP ME UP)

pants: FIDDLESTICKS, A BROKEN DOWN BONER deuce: REJUVENATING IT pants: HURP HURP HURP HURP HURP (FIXING IT) deuce: FRYGAR pants: INFLATING IT deuce: BREATHING FIRE AND LICKING DICK

spigot: I WOULD JUST LIKE TO BE TREATED WITH DIGNITY AND RESPUHHHHH

pants: HERE WE GO! MEN INTO POSITION QUICKLY! BGALGHLBAGHLAG pants: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE STAND BACK pants: AH-OO-GAH THIS PROCESS IS COMPLETELY SAFE DON'T WORRY pants: *GONG* *GONG* *GONG* EVERYTHING IS PROBABLY FINE pants: *PONK* JUST A ROUTINE TURBINE TRIP pants: *PONK* HOWEVER *PONK* pants: YOU MAY WANT TO CONSIDER *PONK* pants: A GRADUAL EVACUATION OF THE FACTORY FLOOR pants: ALL DONE. GARDYLOO!

pants: FANNYPACKS IN THE CASTRO!!!!!!! spigot: FOLKS I'VE BEEN DILDOED BY A NUTWAD

spigot: I'M A SASSY CYNICAL WEB EDITRIX WITH HER OWN ZINE AND A REGISTERED COPY OF DREAMWEAVER deuce: RICE DING DING A RONI

ozone: IN THEORY, WE CAN COMPILE EVERYTHING WITH "-MSUPERSPARC" deuce: I SWEAR I'LL THROW UP IF YOU KEEP GOING pants: HIDING FROM THE DICK spigot: LET'S GO RIDE THE BONG AROUND THE HOTEL spigot: DING DING HI LADY ANY MAIL FOR ME NO OKAY BLUGHLBUGHLUBHGLUBHLGUBHLLU spigot: LOOK OUT, STAIRS, ETC

spigot: INSTEAD OF RINGING A BELL IN FRONT OF THE STORE HOW ABOUT I WORK MY PENIS PUMP

pants: DING DING DING DING CLICK pants: CLICK CLICK CLICK CLICK pants: T DEUCE MY BELL BROKE

deuce: I'M STARTING TO GET HUNGRY ?!?!?! WHO'S UP FOR PRICKS atandt: MMM pants: ME atandt: ME pants: ALSO ME pants: AND I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO PARTAKE IN THIS PARTICULAR EXTRAVAGANZA atandt: SO ... atandt: SO THAT'S NINE FOR PRICKS THEN

deuce: fisting pants: tri-tip + little white potatoes deuce: I'm up for whatever (as long as there's tri-tip) pants: wasn't sure what else to get deuce: no tri-tip, I don't put out pants: oh and a big-ass onion

pants: DROWN ME deuce: DROWNING YOU, AYE pants: DROWNING IN PROGRESS (DIP) pants: BLBLBLBL DROWNING NOISES.WAV deuce: HUH UH UH BUH

pants: DRUNK IN PORTLAND, AMA

pants: RESET MY BONER TO ITS INITIAL STATE (FLOPPY, STUPID) pants: YES YOU NEED TO USE THE DIPSWITCH

spigot: WE'RE HAVING A DIPFEST OVER HERE spigot: PRICKS AND SALSA spigot: LET'S GET WITH THE PROGRAM GANG

spigot: RUNNING OUT OF PORN HERE spigot: DIPPING INTO ADMIRAL KRAG deuce: THAT BAD HUH spigot: WELL THERE'S THE FRIZZY-HAIRED MEXICAN LADY SUCKING DICK CIRCA 1986

: D->I->C->K->S : <---- - + ----> : S<-K<-C<-O<-C deuce: CONCENTRATE ON MY VOICE ... SOON YOU WILL BE GAY : ESPERANTO ESTAS POR GEJULOJ

pants: BUHHHHH GAY DUH deuce: HURRRRR BOP BING

pants: DO YOU HAVE ANY OTHER FLAVORS THAN DIRTPIPE

pants: I'M A DIRTY BOMB deuce: I'M A GEIGER COUNTER deuce: LET'S DO THIS

deuce: OOOOOOOOOOOF pants: THE FLOOR IS DIRTY pants: I'M ALLERGIC TO DUST pants: COULD YOU PRESS MY HEAD SOMEWHERE ELSE

pants: ...OR WOULD THAT BE DIRTY POOL pants: T DEUCE WHAT IS DIRTY POOL pants: T DEUCE I WANT TO PLAY DIRTY POOL deuce: DIRTY POOL IS BILLIARDS WITH SHIT ON THE TABLE deuce: (ACTUAL SHIT)

deuce: SQUIRTING OUT SILLY STRING deuce: ........ BUT IT'S NOT SILLY STRING pants: WE WON'T BE FOOLED AGAIN deuce: YOU DON'T FORGET THAT QUICKLY pants: SO THIS TIME IT WILL BE SILLY STRING RIGHT deuce: WE'LL SEE !!!!!!! deuce: PISSSSSSSSS pants: THAT IS JUST DIRTY POOL pants: OKAY HOW ABOUT SOME SILLY STRING THEN (I WILL WAIT) deuce: MORE BLOOD THIS TIME

spigot: I REMIND YOU THAT THE CIABATTA DIPPER REQUIRES A CIABATTA DIAPER

spigot: I'M FAT FOR TEACHER

spigot: DISCONNECT MY DOODLE-DONG spigot: NOT GOING TO SAY BAD WORDS ANYMORE

spigot: I SAID ****DISCREET**** BLOWJOBS AVAILABLE IN MY PARKING GARA-- SHOULD PROLLY KEEP MY VOICE DOWN

dick: HORNY ROB! bung: HR6787.JPG dick: COMPUTER PEOPLE SPEAK A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE ALTOGETHER dick: IT'S DISK DRIVE THIS AND ASSFUCK THAT deuce: ADMIRAL KRAGGGG

spigot: T PANTS WHAT'S A DIR pants: T SPIGOT IT'S LIKE A POINTER WITHOUT A * spigot: AND IT SAYS DISK FULL spigot: I HAVE AFTER DARK INSTALLED

pants: DOWNLOAD ME deuce: YOU ARE TOO LARGE TO FIT ON MY THUMB DRIVE deuce: NO OFFENSE, FATASS

spigot: SIR THERE SEEMS TO BE A MISTAKE pants: THIS IS HARDLY THE TIME OR THE PLACE spigot: YOUR DICK HAS FLOPPED OUT OF YOUR PANTS AND INTO MY MOUTH spigot: I'M NOT ZONED FOR THIS spigot: (FINES) : pants > WHY DID YOU RENT A FORKLIFT : pants > oh : spigot > MY DOG SAYS I'M NOT ALLOWED TO TALK TO YOU (ONLINE OR OTHERWISE) pants: JUST KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT AND EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY pants: DROWN HIM IN WARM SUDSY AIDS pants: OR MAKE HIM TALK (WHATEVER) spigot: OKAY I'LL HAVE ONE MORE JAR OF PEANUT BUTTER BUT THEN BED pants: IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN pants: WHY WON'T YOU DISMISS THE DIALOG BOX

spigot: I WAS GRABBED AND MOLESTED THERE, THEN HE CUT OFF MY HEAD AND DRAINED MY BLOOD INTO THE TOILET AND FLUSHED IT spigot: REAL MATURE

pants: M - I - C !!!!!!!!! spigot: SEE YOU IN THE PARKING LOT pants: K - E - Y spigot: A "KEY" IS BEATNIK FOR "MARIJUANA JOINT" spigot: M O U BLHGLBHGLBUH pants: HLAGHULAHULAG AGHULAHU ALGALUG

deuce: let's sing Disney songs pants: t r a n n y v i s i o n

spigot: TOOTHLESS, EUNUCHED WEB COMICS spigot: ONLY THE FINEST DISTILLED, POTABLE, PURIFIED, FILTERED, DEIONIZED, SPARKLING ARTESIAN SPRING MINERAL WATER TO CLEAN THE JIZZ OFF MY DESK pants: ALMOST 9AM AND I ONLY HAVE 9,000 CALORIES LEFT FOR THE DAY spigot: UNLESS YOU GO BACK TO SLEEP AND WAKE UP AGAIN

pants: my dong: oversize tufted leather distressed wall-mounted sophisticated sweeping elegant easy-open petite bronze deuce: so many words deuce: stop wording pants: can't, must word pants: better ballgag me pants: my dong: generous evolving rare (or nonexistent!!!!!) accommodating effective non-disruptive zero downtime deuce: ballgag incoming pants: thank you sirs

pants: SOME WAG TAGGED TODAY'S BONEQUEST EPISODE WITH #AUTISM deuce: CUM deuce: T PANTS DO YOU THINK OF YOURSELF MORE AS A `<DIV>` OR A `<SPAN>` pants: _<DIV>_ FOR SURE deuce: PASS

pants: ELECTROLYTES FOR TRILOBITES pants: I, THE SECOND GAYEST EXTINCT MARINE ARTHROPOD THAT OCCURRED ABUNDANTLY DURING THE PALEOZOIC ERA, WITH A CARAPACE OVER THE FOREPART, AND A SEGMENTED HIND PART DIVIDED LONGITUDINALLY INTO THREE LOBES pants: WHAT PART OF SEGMENTED HIND DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND

spigot: ON AGAIN OFF AGAIN LIKE MY ROMANCE WITH DICK spigot: ENOUGH WITH THE PRIVATE MESSAGES PEOPLE I HAVE FEELINGS HERE spigot: I BONKED MY HEAD ON THE TOILET AND I NEED ATTENTION spigot: I'M DIZZY AND BONKY AND I HAVE TO SING spigot: HAVE YOU SEEN / THE MUFFIN MAN spigot: THE MUFFIN MAN spigot: THE MUFFIN MAN spigot: CLOSE THE FUCKING DOOR spigot: OH YES I AM / THE MUFFIN MAN spigot: THE MUFFIN MAN spigot: SLEEPY

pants: BONGZILLA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: BLBLBLBL IT IS SERIOUSLY PROMOTING AN OPEN SMOKING ENVIRONMENT spigot: WE ARE ALL DIZZY AND PASSED OUT ON/AROUND THE COUCH spigot: MY FACE IS SMOOSHED INTO THE DOGSHIT

spigot: WHEN YOU SAY "DM ME" AM I SUPPOSED TO DIRTPIPE MILKSHAKE YOU spigot: IS THAT HOW PEOPLE ARE SLIDING INTO YOUR DM'S AND BM'S

pants: IS THE JERKCITY ARTICLE DELETED YET deuce: DO I HAVE TO LOOK pants: NO NOT REALLY pants: WILL YOU HOLD MY HAND DURING CAPTAIN AMERICA

pants: DO I LOOK FAT spigot: TAKE THE PRICKS OUT OF YOUR HANDS AND MOUTH spigot: OKAY NOW PUT THE LEFT PRICK IN YOUR RIGHT HAND AND JUST ONE IN YOUR MOUTH spigot: NOW PUT BOTH PRICKS FROM YOUR LEFT HAND IN THE LEFT SIDE OF YOUR MOUTH spigot: THERE spigot: YOU ARE VERY FUCKING FAT

pants: FINE, I WILL PERSONALLY BEAT MYSELF OFF deuce: NO ONE WILL DO IT FOR YOU pants: WELL YOU'RE HERE deuce: DO I LOOK LIKE I'M A BEATER OFFER pants: AYUH

pants: DROWN YOURSELVES pants: THEN FUCK ME IN THE FACE pants: DO IT NOW pants: MOUTH CLOSING SALE pants: EVERYTHING MUST GO

spigot: FOLKS I'M A PROFESSIONAL DICKLICKER ON A CLOSED COURSE (DO NOT ATTEMPT)

deuce: MY BALLS HAVE LUPUS spigot: MY BEAUTIFUL FACE

spigot: BLUH: PROTEIN.JPG spigot: SHE'S PERFORMING SOME SORT OF PHOTOSYNTHESIS spigot: CLEAN THE FUCKING LINT TRAPS WHILE YOU'RE DOWN THERE LADY

pants: HOW DID I GET THIS HARD