BONEQUEST perspective-dice-random ABOUT

EPISODES: 2017

No. Date   Title / Dialog Players Tags
6,522 1/1/2017 foopmtph
pants: FOOPMTPH EJECTED INTO SPACE deuce: SURROUNDED BY FAINT GLINTING PISS CRYSTALS (NOT MY PISS)
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#foomph
#piss
#scientifically-accurate
#space
#space-nuts-background
6,523 1/2/2017 a potemkin village
dick: AMERICA RUNS ON DUNKIN deuce: MY BALLS ARE A POTEMKIN VILLAGE pants: I WIL PRAY FOR YOU
deuce
dick
pants
#balls
#deuce-dick-pants
#dunkin-donuts
#potemkin-village
#product-placement
#woodring-room-background
6,524 1/3/2017 order of operations
pants: RATTLE MY CAGE pants: GIVE UP THE GHOST pants: BURY ME OUT BACK pants: DO AS THE ORDER OF OPERATIONS DICTATES: pants: MULTIPLICATION, DIVISION, FIRST TIME ANAL, SUBTRACTION
pants
#anal
#first-time-anal
#huffy-pants
#math
#pants-solo
#wang
#woodring-stairs-background
6,525 1/4/2017 would that it were so simple
pants: CLOSE ALL THE WINDOWS AND FILL THE HOUSE FULL OF SPURT pants: SOME WILL LEAK OUT BUT THE SPURT WILL BE MANUFACTURED FASTER THAN THE LEAKAGE deuce: SPURT LEVELS RISING AT VARYING RATES (SLOWLY, THEN FAST, THEN SLOWLY AGAIN) pants: WOULD THAT IT WERE SO SIMPLE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#engineering
#fluid-mechanics
#jizz
#spurt
#urinal-background
6,526 1/5/2017 t deuce wasn't me
deuce: T PANTS DID YOU ASSASSINATE A RUSSIAN AMBASSADOR deuce: AGAIN deuce: I THOUGHT WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS pants: T DEUCE WASN'T ME
deuce
pants
#ambassador
#assassination
#current-events
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#lawnmower
#russia
#sfw
#turkey
#white-background
6,527 1/6/2017 can you keep a secret
spigot: T PANTS CAN YOU KEEP A SECRET (T DEUCE TOO I GUESS) pants: T SPIGOT OKAY deuce: YES spigot: _I REALLY AM BUTTMAN FOCUSED_ deuce: GOOD TO KNOW deuce: FLUSHING MEMORY spigot: LOL!!~~~~~~~~J/K HAPPY 2017 EVERY1
deuce
pants
spigot
#blue-background
#buttman
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#new-years
#porn
6,528 1/7/2017 so very very tired
pants: TIRED pants: SO VERY VERY TIRED pants: BARELY ABLE TO HEIL HITLER
pants
#hitler
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
#very-very-tired
#weird-pants-face
6,529 1/8/2017 what-ever
pants: NEW YEAR, NEW BAG OF FARTS spigot: WIFE SAYS I CAN LICK DICK WHENEVER I WANT, JUST NOT IN THE HOUSE
pants
spigot
#dicklicking
#farts
#high-res
#marriage
#mousehole
#new-year
#pants-spigot
#woodring-room-background
6,530 1/9/2017 titanic 2
deuce: T PANTS BOUGHT TITANFALL 2, VOWING TO NEVER PLAY IT pants: T DEUCE DID YOU MEAN 'TITANIC 2' deuce: N--YES deuce: OKAY I LAUNCHED TITANFALL 2 BUT I HAVEN'T PLAYED IT YET SO WE'RE STILL GOOD
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#movies
#sfw
#urinal-background
#video-games
6,531 1/10/2017 sign here and here and initial here
spigot: _PACKAGE FOR MISTER FACE_ dick: THPETHIAL DELIVERY
dick
spigot
#dick
#dick-spigot
#mail
#mock-lisp
#planet-of-the-apes
#woodring-field-background
6,532 1/11/2017 daddy will never let you wear this much makeup
pants: DADDY WILL NEVER LET YOU WEAR THIS MUCH MAKEUP deuce: THANK YOU FOR LISTENING
deuce
pants
#daddy
#deuce-pants
#green-background
#sfw
#title-mismatch
6,533 1/12/2017 only a dollop will do
pants: PLEASE DO THE NEEDFUL deuce: SAY PRETTY PLEASE pants: I SAID PLEASE deuce: WITH SUGAR ON TOP pants: TOO FAR deuce: AND A SLICE OF *_AIDS_* deuce: A SLAB OF *_AIDS_* deuce: A DOLLOP OF DICK pants: I LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING (THE THEMES AT PLAY) deuce: SLICE, SLAB, DOLLOP deuce: IT'S A CLEAR PROGRESSION AND THE RESULT IS [UNINTELLIGIBLE]
deuce
pants
#aids
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#deucegrin
#dick
#needful
#somber-deuce
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,534 1/13/2017 graveyard shit protocol
spigot: OKAY LET ME STOP YOU RIGHT THERE spigot: SO spigot: CARL SAGAN DIES spigot: NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON SHITS ON HIS GRAVE spigot: SUPPOSE NEIL DIES spigot: WHAT FOLLOWS ARE ENORMOUS COMPLICATIONS, UNSURE OF STRATEGY spigot: RICHARD DAWKINS SHITS ON NEIL'S GRAVE? deuce: GIANNA MICHAELS STEPS IN
deuce
spigot
#carl-sagan
#deuce-spigot
#neil-degrasse-tyson
#porn
#richard-dawkins
#science
#space-nuts-background
#typo
6,535 1/14/2017 gross and mostly unbeatoffable
deuce
pants
#bad-transcript
#deuce-pants
#farts
#funloving-nonsense
#god
#huffy-pants
#piss-trough-background
#spiders
#weird-pants-face
6,536 1/15/2017 we're busting balls 1/3
spigot: (RUBS HANDS) BOY DO I HAVE BIG PLANS TO GET OUR PORN COMPANY BACK ON TOP THIS 2017 spigot: TOLD ALL OUR VENDORS WE NEED CLOTHES ON THE WOMEN AND NUDE MEN, THAT'S A DONE DEAL spigot: WE GOT CUCKS, WE'RE BUSTING BALLS, WE'RE FEMMING DOMS deuce: WE'LL MAKE MILLION$
deuce
spigot
#ballbusting
#business
#cbt
#cfnm
#cuck
#deuce-spigot
#femdom
#mountain-background
#nudity
#porn
#series
#title-mismatch
6,537 1/16/2017 jerkoff instruction, encouragement 2/3
spigot: OUR CAMERAS ARE PERMANENTLY AIMED DOWN AT THE FLOOR FOR MAXIMUM SHOE AND FOOT-FOCUSED WHATNOT spigot: ALSO ALL THE LADIES HAVE DICKS AND WE ARE LETTING ASIAN PEOPLE DO PORN NOW spigot: OH . . . . . . AND _ONE MORE THING!!!!!!!!!!!_ IF THE MARKET DOES NOT RESPOND WE ARE ALSO AGGRESIVELY PUSHING JERKOFF INSTRUCTION AND JERKOFF ENCOURAGEMENT deuce: BECAUSE EVERYONE NEEDS THAT
deuce
spigot
#asians
#business
#deuce-spigot
#feet
#foot-fetish
#joe
#joi
#mountain-background
#porn
#series
#shemale
#title-mismatch
#tranny
#transexual
#ts
#typo
#whatnot
6,538 1/17/2017 it's a brand new day 3/3
spigot: WE GOT COUNTDOWNS, WE GOT RED LIGHT GREEN LIGHT, WE GOT GIRLS PANTOMIMING... spigot: ...EXACTLY WHAT BEATOFF STEPS TO PERFORM AND DOWNLOADABLE,... spigot: ...PRINTABLE PDFS TO ELEVATE THE CURRICULUM spigot: I DO NOT WANT ANYONE SAYING THEY LACK INSTRUCTION OR ENTHUSIASM TO... spigot: ...BEAT OFF IN 2017, IT'S A NEW DAY spigot: CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP spigot: I AM NOT CLAPPING I AM SHOUTING AT YOU TO CLAP
spigot
#business
#clapping
#joi
#mountain-background
#porn
#school
#series
#shouting
#spigot-solo
#title-mismatch
6,539 1/18/2017 bomb threat
deuce: CALLING IN A BOMB THREAT pants: FAG deuce: I PREFER THE TERM "HOMO"
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#fag
#gay
#strip-drought-2017
#terrorism
#urinal-background
6,540 1/25/2017 pretty flowers
pants: CAN YOU TELL THIS IS ME JACKING OFF (SERIES OF POLAROIDS ON COFFEE TABLE) deuce: T PANTS THEY'RE PHOTOS OF FLOWERS pants: H-HOLD ON
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#deuce-pants
#flower-series
#huffy-pants
#one-hour-photo
#photography
#woodring-room-background
6,541 1/26/2017 now he's asking her if she can please smile
spigot: I PRAY HE DOESN'T GET ANY ON HER BEAUTIFUL FACE spigot: OH GOD HE DID spigot: AND IT LOOKS LIKE HE DID IT DELIBERATELY
spigot
#facial
#kitty
#porn
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,542 1/27/2017 the line for the bathroom
pants: CAN I BE PRESIDENT SOME DAY spigot: I THINK YOU'RE NEXT UNLESS THIS IS THE LINE FOR THE BATHROOM
pants
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#credit-card
#pants-spigot
#politics
#president
#woodring-stairs-background
6,543 1/28/2017 both ends
deuce: BAD KITTY pants: KISS BOTH ENDS deuce: I'M FULL pants: GEICO PEPSI
deuce
pants
#advertising
#angry-panel
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#geico
#huffy-pants
#kitty
#mountain-background
#pepsi
6,544 1/29/2017 bearded windbreaker
pants: PRE-RETAIL, IMPROPER FRAMERATE, HARDCODED SUBTITLES pants: AHEM EXCUSE ME BUT HTTPS://GOO.GL/MAPS/46K4T7JJSRD2 deuce: THAT'S AN AMERICAN TREASURE pants: BLESSED BE deuce: BALLS DEEP
deuce
pants
#balls
#bearded-windbreaker
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#google-maps
#i-love-you
#url
#wicca
#woodring-room-background
6,545 1/30/2017 sloshing, splashing
pants: WHOSE PISS BUCKET IS THIS (SLOSHING, SPLASHING) deuce: T PANTS THAT'S ANOTHER PHOTO OF A FLOWER pants: DROPS BUCKET
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#flower-series
#huffy-pants
#null
#piss
#woodring-field-background
6,546 1/31/2017 two dorks in suits
pants: WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU HERE (PARKING LOT EMPTY, WINDOWS BOARDED UP, TWO DORKS IN SUITS) deuce: T PANTS THOSE ARE ALSO TWO PHOTOS OF FLOWERS pants: WHAT IS IT WITH THESE FLOWERS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#flower-series
#huffy-pants
#sfw
#woodring-room-background
6,547 2/1/2017 zucchini
pants: IS THERE NO NOT-GAY WAY TO WASH THESE ZUCCHINI pants: MAYBE LENGTH-WISE???? NOPE spigot: PUT THEM ON THE LAWN AND USE THE GARDEN HOSE FROM FAR AWAY pants: DISHWASHER pants: SITTING ON THEM UP AND DOWN????? NOPE spigot: STUFFING THEM IN MY MOUTH WHILE WEARING THE AIDS QUILT LEADING A PRIDE PARADE????? NOPE spigot: PUT ON A DRESS AND DO A CAM SHOW FOR 100 TOKENS????? NOPE deuce: ARE YOU EVEN IN POSSESSION OF THE ZUCCHINI ANYMORE pants: WE ATE IT LIKE CORN
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#deucegrin
#food
#not-gay
#queer-quilt
#spigot-points
#urinal-background
#zucchini
6,548 2/2/2017 foggy bottom
atandt
net
#atandt-net
#constipation
#fighting-irish-pose
#orange-groves
#vampire
#white-background
6,549 2/3/2017 volume knob
spigot: GOD BLESS THAT SLOBBERY, ENTHUSIASTIC COCKSUCKER AND HER POUTY LITTLE FUCKFACE deuce: I PARTICULARLY APPRECIATE HER SKINNY ATHLETIC BODY AND HOW THE VOLUME KNOB CAN BE TURNED TO ZERO spigot: IF I CAN'T HEAR THE CHOKING I CAN'T GET IT UP deuce: THAT'S YOUR HANGUP MAN
deuce
spigot
#cant-beat-off-if
#deuce-points
#deuce-spigot
#porn
#spigot-points
#urinal-background
6,550 2/4/2017 everybody out
deuce: EVERYONE OUT I HAVE TO BEAT OFF
atandt
deuce
pants
spigot
#atandt-deuce-pants-spigot
#high-res
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
6,551 2/5/2017 gardyloo
pants: LORDY deuce: GARDYLOO pants: WOT'S ALL THIS NOW deuce: COS GAY
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#gardyloo
#great-britain
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
6,552 2/6/2017 troll controller
pants: "TAKING ONE FOR THE TEAM" deuce: "YOU ARE DEFINITELY GAY" pants: "AIDS IS WHAT YOU HAVE NOW" deuce: "YOLO, HOMO" pants: WE WOULD HAVE BEEN REALLY GOOD AT NAMING TV EPISODES: M.A.S.H., FANTASY ISLAND deuce: WEST WING
deuce
pants
#aids
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#mousehole
#python
#television
#troll
#troll-blowing
#woodring-room-background
6,553 2/7/2017 here it comes again
spigot: OH CHRIST HERE IT COMES AGAIN LIKE NIAGRA FALLS
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#comic-chat
#irc
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#typo
#urinal-background
6,554 2/8/2017 would you like to see my mousehole
pants: T DEUCE WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE MY MOUSEHOLE deuce: DID YOU MEAN: _MOUSTACHE_
deuce
pants
#autocorrect
#deuce-pants
#did-you-mean
#hospital-background
#mousehole
#moustache
#spelling
6,555 2/9/2017 was that really it
spigot: HEY GUESS WHAT deuce: WHAT'S UP spigot: JUST THAT I LIKE COCKS deuce: WAS THAT REALLY IT spigot: AND I'M FAT
deuce
spigot
#cocks
#deuce-spigot
#fat
#somber-deuce
#white-background
6,556 2/10/2017 nose and glasses
deuce
spigot
#chinese-food
#deuce-spigot
#disguise
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#white-background
6,557 2/11/2017 the hamster chronicles
pants: GRR pants: PUT ME DOWN pants: I DEMAND JUSTICE pants: LEMME AT 'IM pants: WHY I OUGHTA pants: MY LITTLE HAMSTER FISTS FLAILING pants: OOH YOU'RE REALLY GONNA GET IT (STUFFING ME HEAD FIRST INTO A HABITRAIL TUBE) pants: I'M WARNING YOU (HAMSTER VOICE MUFFLED)
pants
#hamster
#mountain-background
#pants-solo
#sfw
#weird-pants-face
6,558 2/12/2017 don't cry
pants: DON'T CRY pants: IT'S OKAY deuce: WUHHHHHH
deuce
pants
#crying
#deuce-pants
#rice-a-roni
#sad-deuce
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,559 2/13/2017 piss twins
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#piss
#typo
#urinal-background
6,560 2/14/2017 the sticky heat of the day will dictate that detail
deuce: GAY REDUNDANCY DETECTED pants: MMM YES QUITE (FANNING SELF)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#gay
#heat-wave
#white-background
6,561 2/15/2017 one snicker please
pants
spigot
#candy
#pants-spigot
#snickers
#super-bowl
#television
6,562 2/16/2017 key party
#behind-the-scenes
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deja-vu
#sfw
#shutdown
#windows-xp
6,563 2/17/2017 shrove monday, shrove tuesday
pants: WHAT'S THE DIFF BETWEEN SHROVE MONDAY AND SHROVE TUESDAY pants: DO I REALLY HAVE TO BE SHIRTLESS FOR BOTH deuce: ANSWER: EXACTLY ONE DAY pants: SEEMS KINDA UNFAIR
deuce
pants
#christianity
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#holiday
#mountain-background
#shirtless
#shrove-tuesday
6,564 2/18/2017 take the /quiz
deuce: TAKE THE /QUIZ!!!! pants: GEE WHIZ MISTER DO YOU THINK WE'LL BE ABLE TO CROWDFUND OUR WAY OUT OF THIS CEMENT PIT
deuce
pants
#cement
#crowdfunding
#deuce-pants
#irc
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
6,565 2/19/2017 doctor or mister
pants: THERE'S AN ONION IN MY BOTTOM deuce: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND THE FUTURE OF HUMANITY, WHATEVER YOU DO... deuce: DON'T PULL IT OUT, DON'T POO, AND DEFINITELY, _DEFINITELY_ DON'T FART pants: GOT IT pants: I AM SPOCK deuce: DR. OR MR. pants: TURN THE CRANK AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS deuce: TURN YOUR KEY, SIR pants: PUSH THE BUTTON
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
#somber-deuce
#spock
#star-trek
#wargames
#weird-pants-face
6,566 2/20/2017 good things are happening
deuce: CAN WE JUST AGREE THAT MY MOUTH IS A RECEPTACLE AND _NOT_ A TOILET pants: EITHER WAY TAMPONS DON'T GO IN THERE pants: YOU CAN'T FLUSH THOSE GODDAMN THINGS pants: OR CAN YOU???????????????????????????????????????? pants: NO
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#deucegrin
#drunk-deuce
#mouth
#toilet
#urinal-background
6,567 2/21/2017 barney fife sniff
spigot: BJ POWER AND ASSOCIATES pants: TIE, SUIT, SLICKED-BACK HAIR spigot: T PANTS YOU'RE ON SPEAKER pants: CINCHES UP BATHROBE TIE, BARNEY FIFE SNIFF pants: I GOT THIS spigot: BOOOOOOOOOOP BOOOOP LONG LOUD TOUCHTONES FOR AN HOUR
pants
spigot
#barney-fife
#bathrobe
#bathrobe-of-pants
#interview
#mousehole
#nat-king-cole
#pants-spigot
#spigot-points
#teleconference
#telephone
#telephony
#touchtone
#unbeatoffable
#woodring-room-background
6,568 2/22/2017 hey no reason just curious
pants: TO KEEP READING, PLEASE ENTER YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS. pants: T DEUCE HEY NO REASON JUST CURIOUS BUT DO YOU HAPPEN TO KNOW WHAT A BUTTHOLE HOLIDAY IS (SHOULD I BE WORRIED) deuce: NO IDEA (LYING) pants: WELL I'M RELIEVED
deuce
pants
#butthole
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#porn
#soft-paywall
#woodring-room-background
6,569 2/23/2017 helmet, pipe, umbrella, unicycle, overalls
deuce: I TOTALLY SEE WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO DO THERE (WEARING MY HELMET, SMOKING MY PIPE, TWIRLING AN UMBRELLA) pants: (UNICYCLE, OVERALLS, ONE MAN BAND)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#neon-grid-background
#sfw
6,570 2/24/2017 slightly below average intelligence
spigot: PROUD TO SAY I JUST CALLED SOMEONE A DUMB DONG (EDITED) deuce: YOU'RE A SLIGHTLY BELOW AVERAGE INTELLIGENCE DONG deuce: I WOULDN'T CALL YOU "DUMB" deuce: OKAY RENTING AND WATCHING "DETERRENCE" WITH KEVIN POLLAK FOR NO GOOD REASON AT ALL
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dumb-dong
#kevin-pollak
#mountain-background
#movies
6,571 2/26/2017 at the dinner table
deuce: WE DO NOT LOCK DOORS IN THIS HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: FINE I'LL BEAT OFF AT THE DINNER TABLE
deuce
spigot
#beating-off
#deuce-spigot
#mountain-background
6,572 2/27/2017 surprised anybody noticed
tdtbaa @tdtbaa my favourite jerkcity comic format is: opening panel shows two characters angrily grimacing at each other
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#high-res
#huffy-pants
#meta
#mousehole
#sfw
#tdtbaa
#twitter
#woodring-room-background
6,573 2/28/2017 the nearest knish cart
spigot: BLINDFOLD ME AND PUT ME ANYWHERE IN TOWN AND I'LL STUMBLE AND BUMBLE MY WAY TO THE NEAREST KNISH CART spigot: HALF THE PEOPLE ON THIS BUS HAVE SNICKERDOODLES spigot: WE NEED MORE AEROSOL FOODS AND WE NEED THEM AIMED AT MY MOUTH spigot: CAN WE GET A ROUND TABLE GOING ON THIS
spigot
#cookies
#deja-vu
#doop
#fatness
#food
#irc
#knish
#round-table
#sfw
#snickerdoodles
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,574 3/1/2017 safe from flooding
deuce: CAN YOU MARK YOURSELF SAFE FROM THE FLOODING ON FACEBOOK SO I CAN IGNORE YOU pants: NEVER pants: EASTER PEEP-FLAVORED OREOS pants: WAS RE: WHY AM I FAT, WHY I AM FAT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#easter
#facebook
#fat
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
#was-re
6,575 3/2/2017 police fire or medical
pants: 911 DO YOU NEED POLICE FIRE OR MEDICAL deuce: PISS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#emergency
#fire
#huffy-pants
#medical
#piss
#police
#urinal-background
6,576 3/3/2017 a short break
spigot: LET'S TAKE A SHORT BREAK spigot: PILLS / DEAD
spigot
#death
#pills
#spigot-solo
#suicide
#woodring-stairs-background
6,577 3/4/2017 now we just take a moment
spigot: T PANTS CAN YOU PLEASE ASK ME WHAT A VSR IS pants: T SPIGOT WHAT IS A VSR spigot: IT'S A VERY STIFF ROD spigot: NOW WE JUST TAKE A MOMENT spigot: WE GET USED TO IT spigot: WE GET ACCLIMATED TO IT spigot: WE HEAR IT SO MANY TIMES IT'S LOST ANY HUMOROUS MEANING
pants
spigot
#pants-spigot
#spider-man
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,578 3/5/2017 trying on clothes at mervyn's
spigot: THESE SLACKS ARE TIGHT spigot: WIGGLE YOUR TOE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD spigot: YOU ARE HURTING ME deuce: STOP WITH THE KICKING
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#fashion
#mervyns
#sfw
#title-mismatch
#woodring-field-background
6,579 3/6/2017 finally coming clean
deuce: DID YOU KNOW URI GELLER IS A FRAUD??? deuce: AND THAT DOUSING DOESN'T ACTUALLY WORK???? deuce: HURRRRRRRRRRK SEIZURE spigot: HIS WHOLE LIFE IN TIRELESS SERVICE TO AN AUDIENCE GOING *NO DOY* spigot: MORE LIKE A-DURRRRRI GELLER deuce: FINALLY COMING CLEAN: deuce: I'M THE ONE WHO EMBEZZLED ALL THAT MONEY FROM THE JAMES RANDI FOUNDATION spigot: WITH JUST YOUR MIND SO TECHNICALLY YOU'RE OWED THE $1MM deuce: FUCK YES spigot: THEY MIGHT EVEN OWE YOU SOME MONEY spigot: LET ME CC: MY ACCOUNTANT deuce: [FIRE TRUCK ARRIVES]
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#embezzlement
#fraud
#james-randi
#james-randi-foundation
#jref
#magneto
#psychic-powers
#typo
#uri-geller
#woodring-field-background
6,580 3/7/2017 i'm a robocops
pants: HUMP THAT TOAD deuce: BRAWWWWK THE LAMP pants: I'M A STARSHIP TROOPERS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#movies
#robocop
#toad
#urinal-background
6,581 3/8/2017 can't get away
spigot: BOO deuce: OH SHIT THE GHOST deuce: FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP deuce: CAN'T GET AWAY deuce: FLAP FLAP FLAP deuce: RUNNING INTO WALLS NOW deuce: FLAP FLAP FLAP deuce: FLAP FLAP FLAP deuce: FLAPPITY FLAP FLAP
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#flap
#flappity-bats
#ghost
#repetition
#vampire
#woodring-stairs-background
6,582 3/9/2017 back of police
pants: T DEUCE I DON'T LIKE YOUR NICKI MINAJ DISS TRACK (EDITED) deuce: EAT A DICK pants: SEE THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT (HANDCUFFS, WATCHING HEAD, BACK OF POLICE CAR)
deuce
pants
#current-events
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#nicki-minaj
#police
#rap
#woodring-room-background
6,583 3/10/2017 spray me down
pants: A RED X ON ONE OF YOUR EYES, NEVER CONSISTENT, EVER PRESENT pants:HELP ME PUT POO BACK INTO MY BOTTOM pants: USE THE GOOD TOWELS
pants
#eye-injury
#pants-solo
#poo
#urinal-background
6,584 3/11/2017 whatever happened to artistic vision
deuce: PUT YOUR SHIRT BACK ON pants: OKAY BUT THAT'S NOT WHAT THE SCRIPT SAYS deuce: YOUR PANTS TOO pants: WHATEVER HAPPENED TO ARTISTIC VISION IN THIS TOWN (FUMBLING WITH DOCKERS)
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#dockers
#huffy-pants
#male-nudity
#pants-is-sexy
#pants-of-pants
#porn
#woodring-field-background
6,585 3/12/2017 downer cow
deuce: I'M A DOWNER COW deuce: PUT ME DOWN pants: SAME
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#euthanasia
#livestock
#woodring-stairs-background
6,586 3/13/2017 monsters
deuce: T PANTS SERIOUSLY THE GERMANS DID BAD THINGS DURING WWII pants: T DEUCE DID THEY AT LEAST RECYCLE????? deuce: NO THEY DID NOT pants: MONSTERS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#germany
#history
#holocaust
#huffy-pants
#recycling
#woodring-field-background
#wwii
6,587 3/14/2017 a little mustard, some rye bread
net: FROM EACH ACCORDING TO HIS DONG TO EACH ACCORDING TO HIS MOUTH HOLE deuce: I BELIEVE THE ORIGINAL PHRASE FROM MARX IS "RAPE HOLE" pants: A LITTLE BOURGEOISIE, A LITTLE MUSTARD, SOME RYE BREAD
deuce
net
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-net-pants
#high-res
#marxism
#mountain-background
#sandwich
6,588 3/17/2017 too late
pants: BE MY VALENTINE deuce: TOO LATE, MURDERED EVERYONE pants: SIGH
deuce
pants
#a-love-story
#ascii
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#urinal-background
#valentines-day-massacre
6,589 3/18/2017 holding down the horn
spigot: YOU ARE HALAAL UP IN MY BUSINESS spigot: FOLKS IT'S A ***RARE***GLIMPSE INTO PRESIDENTIAL TAX RETURNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: HOLDING DOWN THE HORN UNTIL I GET MY MCNUGGETS
spigot
#halaal
#islam
#mcdonalds
#politics
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
6,590 3/19/2017 more of a hum
spigot: HE SAYS YOUR DONG FLOPPED OUT LAST NIGHT spigot: HE SAYS IT SANG TO HIM deuce: IT WAS MORE OF A HUM
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dong
#title-mismatch
#woodring-field-background
6,591 3/20/2017 yessssss
deuce: HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED THAT WHEN YOU CLAMP YOUR DICK WITH A CLOTHESPIN IT HURTS???? AND OTHER DEEP THOUGHTS pants: TRY A RUBBER BAND deuce: MAYBE ONE OF THOSE BIG INDUSTRIAL STRENGTH BLACK PAPER CLIPS??? pants: YESSSSS
deuce
pants
#clamping
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#genital-mutilation
#office-supplies
#rubber-band
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,592 3/21/2017 folks
spigot: AND NOW THE PURPOSE OF MY 'FOLKS' IF YOU CAN GIVE ME A MOMENT TO LOCK AND LOAD A TWO-ASSET GAG spigot: DOES SERIOUSLY NOBODY CARE THAT BAY AREA RAINWATER STAINS MY PLASTIC BICYCLE PANTS WITH A FRESH, PROCEDURALLY GENERATED POO-DOWN-THE-LEGS PHONG SHADER deuce: PHONG spigot: PLEASE ADDRESS ME AS CALIFORNIA'S POWER GRID BECAUSE I'M HAVING A ROLLING BROWN-OUT pants: PHONG
deuce
pants
spigot
#bay-area
#comedy
#computer-graphics
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#folks
#phong
#poo
#urinal-background
6,593 3/22/2017 brand unspecified
pants: MY PRECIOUS FIELD NOTES BRAND NOTEPAD AND MY DELICATE LITTLE INK PEN (BRAND UNSPECIFIED)
pants
#office-supplies
#pants-solo
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,594 3/23/2017 where scalloped potatoes don't taste like magazines
spigot: HOME IS WHEREVER THESE SCALLOPED POTATOES DON'T TASTE LIKE MAGAZINES pants: MORE APPETIZERS FROM TRADER JOE'S PLEASE
pants
spigot
#food
#oddly-specific
#pants-spigot
#product-placement
#sfw
#trader-joes
#urinal-background
6,595 3/24/2017 crickets and earthworms
pants: STAND BACK GOTTA BEAT OFF spigot: INCONCLUSIVE BUT I DIDN'T DO THE NEEDFUL OR THE DUE DILIGENCE pants: CRONCH CRONCH CRONCH A DIET OF CRICKETS
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#beating-off
#butter
#crickets
#cronch
#insect-eating
#needful
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,596 3/25/2017 literally mansplained
spigot: THEY LITERALLY MANSPLAINED ALL OVER MY FACE
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#ecu
#facial
#high-res
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
6,597 3/26/2017 nice to meet you
pants: I'M A JIZZ BUG deuce: I'M A JIZZ BUG SQUASHER deuce: NICE TO MEET YOU, JIZZ BUG pants: HOWDY
deuce
pants
#bug
#deuce-pants
#jizz-bugs
#somber-deuce
#urinal-background
6,598 3/27/2017 a wholesome meme
spigot: IS FORCING A LADY TO LICK MY DICK A WHOLESOME MEME deuce: IT'S EMPOWERING deuce: TO YOUR DICK spigot: MAYBE IF SHE APOLOGIZES AFTER
deuce
spigot
#blowjob
#deuce-spigot
#memes
#rape
#wholesome-meme
#woodring-field-background
6,599 3/28/2017 foomp paf
spigot: NOW STUFF BOTH DICKS IN YOUR MOUTH AND SAY BAZINGA * 💥 📷 * ✨ 💡 🌠 * 💥 ✨ PAF
spigot
#bug-report
#debug
#emoji
#foomph
#porn
#python
#spigot-solo
#the-big-bang-theory
#urinal-background
#wienerdog
6,600 3/29/2017 upgrading/fondling
pants: I'M UPGRADING MY GRAPHICS DRIVER deuce: I'M FONDLING YOUR GOODIES
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drivers
#fondling
#goodies
#mousehole
#woodring-room-background
6,601 3/30/2017 mmm yeah the spice must flow mmmm
deuce: DUNE deuce: ARRAKIS deuce: DESSERT [SIC] PLANET
deuce
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dessert
#deuce-solo
#dune
#mmm-yeah-oooh-boy
#photo-background
#sfw
6,602 3/31/2017 your toebeans, your pisspots
deuce: > TOUCH WIENER pants: ***QUEST COMPLETE *** pants: *** YOU HAVE DIED *** pants: *** BANNED *** pants: SHOW ME YOUR TOEBEANS pants: YOUR PISSPOTS pants: YOUR HUDDLED MASSES YEARNING TO DRINK PEPSI hanford: GET OUT OF HERE hanford: GO ON, GET pants: NEVER
pants
#deuce-hanford-pants
#huffy-pants
#infocom
#pawpads
#pepsi
#text-adventure
#uncredited-character
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-stairs-background
6,603 4/1/2017 headcrabs
pants: ARE YOU SURE MAGIC BUTTHOLE INSURANCE IS A GOOD IDEA deuce: IT'S NOT INSURANCE IT'S A GUARANTEE pants: JUST FILL IT WITH ROOT BEER AND GET ON WITH IT deuce: A MAGIC BUTTHOLE FLOAT pants: ADD SOME ICED CREAM deuce: HEADCRABS
deuce
pants
#butthole
#dessert
#deuce-pants
#half-life
#hole
#insurance
#woodring-field-background
6,604 4/2/2017 all i know is
pants: ALL I KNOW IS I CHOKE MY DONG LIKE IT WAS A NURSE OR A PROSTITUTE
pants
#coy-pants
#dong
#masturbation
#mountain-background
#pants-solo
#prostitute
6,605 4/3/2017 quiet all around
deuce: EVERYBODY QUIET WHILE I JERK
deuce
#deuce-solo
#high-res
#masturbation
#mousehole
#no-title-card
#woodring-room-background
6,606 4/4/2017 the inevitable conclusion of the dick
spigot: THE PREMISE IS THAT THERE'S A GROUP OF PEOPLE CHANTING "WHO LIKES DICK" deuce: I SEE spigot: THE CLIMAX IS REACHED WHEN A GUY CALLS OUT FROM THE BACK "I LIKE DICK" deuce: THAT'S HAUNTING spigot: AND THE INEVITABLE CONCLUSION OF THE DICK deuce: I CAN REALLY FEEL THE IMAGERY BUBBLING UP INSIDE AND PUNCHING MY NUTS TWICE spigot: IT MAKES YOU CHOKE ON A FAT COCK AND IT MAKES YOU THINK
deuce
spigot
#analysis
#buh
#choking
#deuce-spigot
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#fat-cock
#literature
#woodring-stairs-background
6,607 4/5/2017 adorable
pants: NUGGGGGGH YOUR GAY WAYS pants: ME = ADORABLE, MY BALLS = SAME pants: PRINT THAT
pants
#balls
#huff
#nuggh
#pants-solo
#print-that
#woodring-field-background
6,608 4/6/2017 really pushing it
deuce: UH OH MY MAC IS RUNNING THREE PROGRAMS NOW deuce: I'M REALLY PUSHING IT spigot: TEACHTEXT NOTE PAD AND KEY CAPS
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dongbutter
#macintosh
#woodring-room-background
6,609 4/7/2017 the hose again
spigot: I'LL TAKE THE HOSE AGAIN deuce: YOU'LL NEVER LEARN
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#hose
#mountain-background
#sfw
6,610 4/8/2017 on the whole
spigot: ON THE WHOLE I FIND YOUR BONER COMPLETELY DISRUPTIVE
spigot
#boner
#mountain-background
#space
#spigot-solo
6,611 4/9/2017 all you can do is fucking cry
spigot: THAT'S FUNNY THE WAY YOU COMBINED THE BORG WITH MONTY PYTHON AND CREATED A CROSS-CONCEPT JOKE pants: NOW LET'S DO THE SKETCH WHERE I'M THE GUY WITH MY DICK IN YOUR DUMB FACE AND YOU CAN'T GET AWAY AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS CRY
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#monty-python
#pants-spigot
#star-trek
#title-mismatch
#woodring-room-background
6,612 4/10/2017 everything we've done is forgiven
pants: WE DON'T HAVE TO THINK LIKE THAT ANYMORE pants: WE'RE TOGETHER NOW pants: EVERYTHING WE'VE DONE IS FORGIVEN pants: EVERYTHING deuce: EXCEPT FOR BLOWING THAT TROLL pants: WELL YES OF COURSE
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#infocom
#solaris
#troll
#troll-blowing
#woodring-field-background
#zork
6,613 4/11/2017 the one light
spigot: PINK PINK BINK BA-DINK PINK DINK PA-DINK BINK PINK spigot: THE ONE LIGHT ABOVE YOU THAT WILL NOT TURN ON pants: BUZZZZZZZ pants: HUMMMMMMM
pants
spigot
#fluorescent-light
#onomatopoeia
#pants-spigot
#pink
#sfw
#sound-effects
#woodring-stairs-background
6,614 4/12/2017 vito is gay hd
pants: THE SOPRANOS GUYS FIND OUT THAT VITO IS GAY HD spigot: LISA NEEDS BRACES CLASSIC SIMPSONS (10 HOUR VERSION) spigot: OKAY BACK TO HANS ZIMMER spigot: BWOMMMMMMMMMMP
pants
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dental-plan
#hans-zimmer
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#simpsons
#the-sopranos
#youtube
6,615 4/13/2017 ow ow ow hot hot hot
pants: OW OW OW THE TAIL OF THE COMET IS HOT OW OW OW SO IS THE OTHER END deuce: COMETS AREN'T HOT THEY'RE COL-- OW OW OW HOT HOT HOT I'M OW STARTING OW TO THINK OW THAT THIS OW ISN'T OW A COMET *OW*
deuce
pants
#astronomy
#brad-pitt
#comet
#deuce-pants
#empty-auditorium-background
#repetition
#science
#sfw
6,616 4/14/2017 better make pancakes
pants: WELP IT'S ON ITS WAY TO THE CORE OF THE EARTH pants: BETTER MAKE PANCAKES deuce: SHOVING deuce: SCUFFLING deuce: SHELLACKING pants: SUCKIN' IT deuce: SQUIRTING deuce: SMEARING deuce: SUBSUMING deuce: SCINTILLATING deuce: SORRY pants: S'OKAY deuce: PUNCHIN' HOOKERS pants: PISSSSSSSSSS
deuce
pants
#alliteration
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#piss
#somber-deuce
#weird-pants-face
#welp
6,617 4/15/2017 an elderly angel combined with an emphysema angel
spigot: FOLKS IT'S 2017 AND WE GOT EVIL ANGELS, ELEGANT ANGELS AND EVASIVE ANGELS (NOT SURE HOW MANY ANGELS WE NEED IN PORN) spigot: THINKIN' WE NEED LESS ENGELBERT HUMPERDINCK ANGELS AND MORE ENTERPRISING ANGELS FOR WORKGROUPS spigot: MADAME YOU LOOK LIKE AN ELDERLY ANGEL COMBINED WITH AN EMPHYSEMA ANGEL
spigot
#angels
#folks
#porn
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#workgroups
6,618 4/16/2017 phonenomena / do doo be-do-do
pants: IS PISS A REAL PHONENOMENA OR JUST A MADE-UP THING deuce: IT'S REAL deuce: BOY HOWDY LET ME TELL YOU pants: RATS deuce: IT'S REAL AS REAL GETS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#mahna-mahna
#piss
#skype-ringtone
#typo
#urinal-backgroud
6,619 4/17/2017 worf and data doin' it in the holodeck
pants: ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GET IT ALL OVER MY FACE AND EYES deuce: THAT'S WHAT THE LABEL SAYS pants: WHAM BAM POW KA-ZAP deuce: BLA-DOW!!!! pants: THE LABEL SAYS JUST TO WASH WITH SAME COLORS AND TUMBLE DRY pants: WAIT NO THAT'S JUST-- NO THAT'S RIGHT pants: I GET EASILY CONFUSED deuce: TURN IT UPSIDE-DOWN AND READ IT AGAIN pants: IT JUST SAYS AND I'M QUOTING HERE SO DON'T THINK I'M RACIST THAT... pants: WORF AND DATA ARE DOIN' IT IN THE HOLODECK deuce: THAT'S NOT RACIST THAT'S JUST GROSS pants: YOU MAY BE RIGHT
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#data
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#laundry
#mountain-background
#onomatopoeia
#star-trek
#worf
6,620 4/18/2017 an outburst of the soul
spigot: ??? SAN / FRAN / CISCO spigot: ??? OPEN YOUR GOLDEN / GURK
spigot
#bay-area
#choking
#dicklicking
#emoji
#gurk
#music
#physical-comedy
#san-francisco
#sfw
#singing
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,621 4/19/2017 throwing it at the bus
pants: PISS IN A PLASTIC BAGGIE pants: WARM, GLOOPY pants: THROWING IT AT THE BUS
pants
#bus
#huffy-pants
#pants-solo
#physical-comedy
#piss
#plastic-baggie-of-piss
#urinal-background
6,622 4/20/2017 at my age
spigot: AT MY AGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: I'M LUCKY I spigot: JUST HAPPY TO B spigot: YA GOTTA WONDER HOW THE
spigot
#alzheimers
#poo
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,623 4/21/2017 great red spot
deuce: JUPITER'S GREAT RED SPOT LOOKS SILLY NOW deuce: YES I SAID IT deuce: I MEAN SERIOUSLY
deuce
#astronomy
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-solo
#dongs
#hashtag
#jupiter
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#woodring-stairs-background
6,624 4/22/2017 trying on cowboy hats
pants: DOES THIS COWBOY HAT MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A TOTAL HOMO deuce: SHORT ANSWER, NO, LONG ANSWER, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO pants: WHAT ABOUT THIS COWMAN HAT deuce: A LITTLE GAY, NOT TOTAL GAY pants: WHAT IF I MAKE THIS FACE deuce: PRETTY GAY, STILL NOT TOTAL GAY
deuce
pants
#cowboy
#deuce-pants
#neon-grid-background
#not-gay
#somber-deuce
#weird-pants-face
6,625 4/23/2017 bad syntax
deuce: WARNING: BAD SYNTAX, PERHAPS A BOGUS '-'? SEE /USR/SHARE/DOC/PROCPS-3.2.8/FAQ deuce: I STILL HATE YOU
deuce
#deuce-solo
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#linux
#procps
#unix
#urinal-background
6,626 4/24/2017 flopped out/ popped out
pants: T DEUCE DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT THAT TIME MY BONER FLOPPED OUT/POPPED OUT deuce: CONSTANTLY pants: YEAH SAME deuce: IT HAUNTS MY WAKING MOMENTS AND INVADES MY DREAMS deuce: ALSO WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#boner
#deuce-pants
#dreams
#indecent-exposure
#urinal-background
6,627 4/25/2017 you said
pants: YOU SAID YOU WERE BEATING OFF deuce: I CAN MULTITASK
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#multitasking
#red-background
#single-panel
6,628 4/26/2017 enter desired username
spigot: ENTER DESIRED USERNAME: spigot: > SPIGOT spigot: THAT USERNAME IS UNAVAILABLE. spigot: SUGGESTED USERNAMES: spigot: > IBLOWTROLLS spigot: > BLOWINGTROLLS95104 spigot: > BLOW_THAT_TROLL spigot: > TROLLBLOWER69
spigot
#infocom
#mountain-background
#poop
#spigot-solo
#troll
#troll-blowing
#username
#zork
6,629 4/27/2017 it's about time
spigot: SHOULD WE HAVE A DICK RATE THREAD pants: I THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER ASK
pants
spigot
#4chan
#dicks
#pants-spigot
#soc
#urinal-background
6,630 4/28/2017 toilet bowl
spigot: IF DISNEY = TOILET BOWL AND STAR WARS = TOILET BOWL THEN pants: I WILL SMEAR LARP ON MY BREAD AND DIP IT IN A BOWL OF FILK
pants
spigot
#disney
#filk
#filking
#larp
#nerd-culture
#pants-spigot
#plant
#star-wars
#toilet
#toilet-bowl
#woodring-field-background
6,631 4/29/2017 mixed up in a jackpot
spigot: T DEUCE IF YOU SEND ME A PIC OF YOU I CAN PRINT IT OUT AND EJACULATE ON IT AND RETURN A PIC OF THAT spigot: NOT SAYING MY PENIS WILL BE IN THE SHOT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: OBV IF YOURS IS IN THE SHOT OF YOUR PIC IT WILL BE IN THE SHOT OF MY PIC BUT WE CAN HOP ON A QUICK CALL deuce: [X] OPT OUT spigot: DON'T WANNA GET MIXED UP IN A JACKPOT HERE
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#filename
#jackpot
#quick-call
#urinal-background
6,632 4/30/2017 if you seek his monument
deuce: BALLS pants: AYUH pants: IF YOU SEEK HIS MONUMENT LOOK AROUND YOU pants: PLUMPERS/PLUGGERS
deuce
pants
#ayuh
#batman-vs-superman
#christopher-wren
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#mountain-background
#plumpers
6,633 5/1/2017 this is not a drill
deuce: SET CONDITION 1SQ FOR STRATEGIC MISSILE LAUNCH deuce: THE RELEASE OF NUCLEAR WEAPONS HAS BEEN AUTHORIZED deuce: THIS IS NOT A DRILL
deuce
#crimson-tide
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#movies
#nuclear-weapons
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
6,634 5/2/2017 one man's incredible journey
spigot: *THE STORY OF ONE MAN'S INCREDIBLE JOURNEY TO LICK DICK* spigot: HELLO spigot: GURK DURK BAGURK
spigot
#dicklicking
#gurk
#onomatopoeia
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,635 5/3/2017 your soul is covered in the ash of past civilizations
pants: MY SOUL IS BEAUTIFUL deuce: YOUR SOUL IS COVERED IN THE ASH OF PAST CIVILIZATIONS deuce: KIND OF AWESOME BUT I WOULDN'T CALL IT BEAUTIFUL
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#soul
#white-background
6,636 5/4/2017 le blurk le bjork
pants: MEAN TIME BETWEEN SQUIRPS spigot: LE PLEBS, LE PLOPS deuce: SHITTWEETS ARE NOT IN REALTIME spigot: LE SQUIRTS pants: BUT THEY ARE EVENTUALLY CONSISTENT spigot: LE BLURK LE BJORK
deuce
pants
spigot
#bjork
#deuce-pants-spigot
#french
#onomatopoeia
#orange-background
#poo
#somber-deuce
#twitter
#weird-pants-face
6,637 5/5/2017 not even dead yet
deuce: T PANTS I THINK I LEFT MY KINDLE AT YOUR HOUSE (CHECK BEHIND THE HEADREST OF THE BED, IT PROBABLY FELL OFF BEHIND THE BED) JUST CRAM YOUR FACE/ASS IN THERE AND FIND OUT pants: CAN'T THINK OF A SINGLE REASON NOT TO WEDGE MY FACE AND HEAD AND ARM BETWEEN THE HEADREST AND THE WALL SO HERE WE GO!!! pants: THE CATS ARE BITING ME AND I'M NOT EVEN DEAD YET
deuce
pants
#cats
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#kindle
6,638 5/6/2017 a duck choking
spigot: FOLKS THE VIETNAMESE LANGUAGE SOUNDS LIKE A DUCK CHOKING ON A CHICKEN BONE
spigot
#duck
#folks
#linguistics
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#vietnam
6,639 5/7/2017 s.b.r.
pants: 900 DICKS spigot: TRAINING MYSELF SO EVERY TIME I SEE ANIME SPIGOT OR ANIME PANTS BEING ANIME GAY I THINK _AT LEAST THESE KIDS BUY BOOKS_ spigot: SOMEHOW DEUCE GETS AWAY WITH JUST BEING ANIME MEAN deuce: STRATEGIC BUTTHOLE RESERVE
deuce
pants
spigot
#anime
#books
#butthole
#deuce-pants-spigot
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#red-background
6,640 5/8/2017 passive-aggressive shithead engineer
spigot: WORKING ON MY PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE SHITHEAD ENGINEER CHARACTER spigot: SIGH!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: CAN YOU SEND ME A ***WORKING*** LINK TO AN ***INTELLIGENT*** JSFIDDLE?????????????????
spigot
#javascript
#jsfiddle
#programming
#software
#spigot-solo
#spigot-the-bear
#white-background
6,641 5/9/2017 because i am a man
deuce: DRINKING MIKE'S HARD LEMONADE, ETC. BECAUSE I AM A MAN deuce: AND THAT'S WHAT MEN DRINK: FAGGOTY DRINKS THAT UNDERAGE GIRLS DRINK deuce: I MEAN deuce: CONTRADICTION FOUND, SULLEN
deuce
#alcohol
#depression
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#filler-panel
#product-placement
#sad-deuce
#white-background
6,642 5/10/2017 all i care about these days
spigot: ALL I CARE ABOUT THESE DAYS IS MAKING SURE THE JERKCITY LOGO IS STILL IN THE SILICON VALLEY OPENING CREDITS
spigot
#gark
#sfw
#shameless-self-promotion
#spigot-solo
#television
#urinal-background
6,643 5/11/2017 sufjan stevens or father john misty or dan the automator
pants: T SPIGOT WOULD YOU RATHER BE MANFONDLED BY SUFJAN STEVENS OR FATHER JOHN MISTY OR DAN THE AUTOMATOR
pants
spigot
#blue-background
#molestation
#musicians
#pants-spigot
#wedding
6,644 5/12/2017 nine more kinds of mustard
spigot: BILL NYE DON'T GOTTA CUSS IN HIS RAPS TO SELL RECORDS pants: NEED 9 MORE KINDS OF MUSTARD FOR THE FRIDGE DOOR
pants
spigot
#bill-nye
#mustard
#pants-spigot
#rap
#sfw
#title-mismatch
#white-background
6,645 5/13/2017 just please stop
pants: ALGHAGLUHALGAG spigot: GHALGUHALGHLUAH atandt: OG&AIG@INTG*YGF atandt: AOG*TAAAAAAAA4 pants: THAT IS NOT HOW YOU DO IT spigot: WHAT NO pants: YOU'RE MAKING US ALL SICK spigot: JUST PLEASE STOP
atandt
pants
spigot
#atandt-pants-spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cocksucking-noises
#dicklicking
#fighting-irish-pose
#funloving-nonsense
#huffy-pants
#sfw
#spigot-points
#teal-background
6,646 5/14/2017 closes flip phone
pants: 9 pants: 1 pants: CLOSES FLIP PHONE
atandt
pants
#atandt-pants
#black-background
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cop-blocking
#police
#sfw
#the-sopranos
6,647 5/15/2017 repeated, urgent
spigot: 1A 7:20 - STILL NOBODY HAS ACKNOWLEDGED YOUR REPEATED, URGENT, OVERMODULATED *BALLS* AND WITH THE COSBY SHOW IN THE BACKGROUND YOU UNKEY WITH A HARD, FLAT "FUCK THESE PEOPLE"
spigot
#balls
#cosby
#failed-comedy
#ham-radio
#mountain-background
#radio
#spigot-solo
6,648 5/16/2017 huff, punch
pants: HUFF THE RAG deuce: PUNCH THAT DICK pants: I CAN FLY
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drugs
#huffing
#orange-background
#solvents
#substance-abuse
6,649 5/17/2017 get offa me
spigot: GOTTA WORK YOUR TRIS, YOUR DELTS, YOUR PLAPS pants: FLUSH THE COKE KAREN
pants
spigot
#cocaine
#fit
#goodfellas
#huffy-pants
#pants-spigot
#plaps
#white-background
6,650 5/18/2017 come and get 'em
deuce: BONERS FOLKS: COME AND GET 'EM pants: TOO COLD FOR BONERS pants: NO WAIT THERE IT GOES pants: NEVERMIND
deuce
pants
#boners
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#folks
#handjob
#starbucks
#urinal-background
6,651 5/19/2017 thought you might know
pants: T DEUCE HEY WHEN'S FAG SEASON pants: THOUGHT YOU MIGHT KNOW deuce: MAY pants: NICE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fag-season
#grey-background
6,652 5/20/2017 can i
pants: CAN I CHOKE MYSELF???????????? pants: NOT EFFECTIVELY
pants
#choking
#mouth
#pants-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
6,653 5/21/2017 and yet i do
pants: BONK BONK BONK I SHOULD NOT BE ABLE TO FLY deuce: PHYSICS SAYS I SHOULD NOT BE ABLE TO EXIST AND YET I DO
deuce
pants
#bee
#bonk
#deuce-pants
#mousehole
#physics
#woodring-room-background
6,654 5/22/2017 anal fissures, kindle paperwhites
deuce: T PANTS CAN'T YOU HAVE ANY IDEAS OF YOUR OWN (PILLS, HEART CONDITIONS, FAT PAINS, ANAL FISSURES, KINDLE PAPERWHITES) pants: T DEUCE NEVER
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#empty-auditorium-background
#kindle
#kindle-paperwhite
#pills
#single-panel
#stray-dot
6,655 5/23/2017 verification of member information is now due
pants: OH AM I A NOBLE pants: BECAUSE IT SURE SEEMS LIKE I deuce: NO YOU ARE NOT pants: CAN'T WE JUST deuce: NO
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dong
#henry-ii
#huffy-pants
#nobility
#urinal-background
6,656 5/24/2017 the most beautiful girl
pants: T DEUCE YOU'RE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN HACKNEY Y'KNOW deuce: WOT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#hackney
#single-panel
#uncle-sam
#white-background
#wot
6,657 5/25/2017 oops tapped one
deuce: GREAT pants: AYUH spigot: PAGES AND PAGES AND PAGES AND PAGES AND AND PAGES PAGES OF EMOJIS FOR GENDER AND SEXUAL ORIENTATION OOPS TAPPED ONE (COLOR PALETTE TAKES 5 MINS TO LOAD)
deuce
pants
spigot
#angry-panel
#ayuh
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#emoji
#huffy-pants
#yellow-background
6,658 5/26/2017 some sort of code
pants: THE SKILLS TO PAY THE PILLS BILLS pants: CLAMS AND MUSSELS BEING GAY WITH EACH OTHER pants: GRAVY'S GOOD TONIGHT deuce: ARE YOU TALKING IN SOME SORT OF CODE
deuce
pants
#clams
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#funloving-nonsense
#gay
#gravy
#mussels
#pills
#weird-coy-face
#woodring-field-background-2
6,659 5/27/2017 you need to earn it
pants: TOP ME OFF (FILL IT TO THE RIM) deuce: DO NOT OVERFILL pants: WISH YOU HAD deuce: YOU NEED TO EARN IT
deuce
pants
#coffee
#deuce-pants
#filler-panel
#gasoline
#gay-wrestling-background
#nsfw
#ponk
6,660 5/28/2017 spooky font
spigot: WHO YA TALKIN' TO SPIGOT spigot: A SPOOKY FONT SPELLING OUT THE TITLE OF THE FILM: spigot: H T M L
spigot
#font
#html
#movies
#oklahoma-musical
#sfw
#space-nuts-background
#spigot-solo
6,661 5/29/2017 every piece of candy will be a complete disappointment
.(spigot): I NEED TO REMIND MYSELF THE INTERNET IS FOR KIDS AGE 12-18, NOTHING IS MARKETED, CREATED OR AIMED AT ME PERSONALLY AND EVERY PIECE OF CANDY WILL BE A COMPLETE DISAPPOINTMENT
spigot
#candy
#disappointment
#hospital-background
#internet
#marketing
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#thought
#wisdom
6,662 5/30/2017 it's a big city
deuce: SOMEONE TOOK A SHIT IN YOUR DRINK deuce: ALSO IT'S ALL BUBBLY AROUND THE EDGES SO MANY SOMEBODY PISSED IN IT TOO pants: THESE THINGS HAPPEN (IT'S A BIG CITY)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#gnu
#huffy-pants
#piss
#poo
#typo
#urinal-background
6,663 5/31/2017 creative commons 3.0 license
deuce: MY BALLS ARE AVAILABLE UNDER THE CREATIVE COMMONS 3.0 LICENSE.
deuce
#bonequest-hi-fi
#creative-commons
#deuce-solo
#deuces-balls
#licensing
#nuts-of-deuce
#open-source
#punctuation
#single-panel
#somber-deuce
#urinal-background
6,664 6/1/2017 increase the contrast and zoom in
spigot: FOLKS I DO NOT SELF-IDENTIFY WITH FRISBEE ***OR*** GOLF spigot: IF YOU INCREASE THE CONTRAST AND ZOOM IN YOU CAN REALLY SEE A MOUTH PENIS DRAWN RIGHT ON HIS FACE
spigot
#folks
#frisbee
#golf
#kitty
#mouthpenis
#spigot-solo
#white-background
6,665 6/2/2017 making fart sounds
spigot: THE KILOWATT 6 BRAVO STATION MAKING FART SOUNDS, PLEASE STOP
spigot
#farts
#ham-radio
#mountain-background
#radio
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,666 6/3/2017 a good impression
pants: WHY DO I HAVE TO WEAR A TIE TO THE TOILETS deuce: BECAUSE YOU WANT TO MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION, DON'T YOU
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#first-impression
#interview
#single-panel
#tie
#toilet
#urinal-background
6,667 6/4/2017 chew that cud
pants: CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP deuce: CHEW THAT CUD YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD pants: CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP
deuce
pants
#chewing
#cows
#cud
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#farm
#urinal-background
6,668 6/5/2017 everyone's a comic
deuce: MEWOIHFL SFSDLKFSF SDF S JFS;LJFS deuce: OY VEY
deuce
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#jewish
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,669 6/6/2017 my balls are lugubrious my dick is ebullient my mouth is a shibboleth
deuce: MY BALLS ARE LUGUBRIOUS deuce: MY DICK IS EBULLIENT deuce: MY MOUTH IS A SHIBBOLETH
deuce
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-solo
#deuces-balls
#nuts-of-deuce
#sesquipedalian
#somber-deuce
#urinal-background
6,670 6/7/2017 patent pending
pants: CRAZY COCKS pants: I HOPE TO PATENT THEM/THOSE deuce: THE COCKS ??? deuce: OR THE USAGE OF THE COCKS IN THAT MANNER pants: I HAVE NO IDEA, I JUST WANT A PATENT deuce: I SEE pants: I'LL TELL YOU WHAT: YOU CAN PATENT ME AND I'LL PATENT YOU
deuce
pants
#cocks
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fat
#patent
#sleep-number
#woodring-room-background
6,671 6/8/2017 glugging/chugging
spigot: MORE WINE FOR ME I GUESS
spigot
#alcohol
#and-how
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
#wine
6,672 6/9/2017 please fill the silo with corn
pants: PLEASE FILL THE SILO WITH CORN AND THEN PLEASE PUT ME IN THE SILO
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#corn
#farming
#neon-grid-background
#pants-solo
#sfw
#silo
#single-panel
#suicide
6,673 6/10/2017 robust and extensible
dick: I AM ROBUST AND EXTENSIBLE deuce: T DICK I'M OBJECT-ORIENTED AND MULTIMEDIA SAVVY deuce: T DICK ALSO I'M PLUG-N-PLAY dick: T DEUCE NO I THINK YOU ARE A FONT OF WISDOM (RHYMES WITH "JIZM"(ALMOST!!!!))!!!!!! deuce: WUHHHH WHERE WERE WE pants: GOLLY
deuce
dick
pants
#deuce-dick-pants
#double-entendre
#hardware
#software
#urinal-background
6,674 6/11/2017 hey everyone look over here
spigot: HEY EVERYONE LOOK OVER HERE I'M DOING MAGIC TRICKS spigot: OVER HERE EVERYONE PAY ATTENTION TO ME spigot: OKAY PULLING MY PANTS DOWN NOW spigot: IF YOU COULD JUST TURN YOUR HEAD JUST REAL QUICK spigot: ENTERTAINMENT OVER HERE PEOPLE, PUT THE BEER DOWN
spigot
#alcohol
#beer
#magic
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,675 6/12/2017 what kind of pie
pants: WHAT KIND OF PIE ARE WE TALKING ABOUT spigot: MORE LIKE WONDER HOW THIS MOVIE GOT MADE
pants
spigot
#movies
#pants-spigot
#pie
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
#wonder-woman
6,676 6/13/2017 carefully placing the towel in front of the toilet
pants: T SPIGOT CAREFULLY PLACING THE TOWEL IN FRONT OF THE TOILET spigot: THINKING MAYBE BOOF THE DOGGO SHOULD BE SLANG FOR GOING TO THE BATHROOM
pants
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#internet-slang
#pants-spigot
#single-panel
#toilet
#towel
#woodring-field-background
6,677 6/14/2017 forced to be gay or what
net: IF I GET THE WRONG EAR PIERCED AM I FORCED TO BE GAY OR WHAT deuce: "FORCED" IS A STRONG WORD BUT LET'S GO WITH IT FOR NOW
deuce
net
#camgirls
#deuce-net
#earring
#feet
#foot-fetish
#gay
#mountain-background
#piercings
#single-panel
6,678 6/15/2017 an amazon original
spigot: AN AMAZON *********ORIGINAL********* spigot: LEMON POPPYSEED ----->MUFFINS<-----
spigot
#amazon
#muffins
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,679 6/16/2017 multi-megaton nuclear explosion
deuce: THERE IS A BLINDING FLASH. YOU HAVE BEEN KILLED IN A MULTI-MEGATON NUCLEAR EXPLOSION. deuce: ***YOU WIN*** pants: SWEET PEACEFUL SILENCE AND DARKNESS. ***HIGH SCORE***
deuce
pants
#death
#deuce-pants
#high-score
#infocom
#nuclear-weapons
#sfw
#the-sweet-release-of-death
#urinal-background
#you-have-died
6,680 6/17/2017 taking one for the team
deuce: YOU KNOW WHAT YOU MUST DO pants: TAKING ONE FOR THE TEAM
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#gark
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,681 6/18/2017 all in good fun
pants: EARLIER WHEN YOU CAUGHT ME BEATING OFF, THAT WAS JUST A JOKE I WAS JUST KIDDING AROUND pants: I WAS PLAYING A PRANK (A PRACTICAL JOKE IF YOU WILL) AND IT WAS ALL IN GOOD FUN pants: FOR THE RECORD I WOULD JUST LIKE TO SAY THAT IT WILL NOT HAPPEN AGAIN pants: I'M SORRY FOR THE INCONVENIENCE deuce: DON'T MAKE PROMISES YOU CAN'T KEEP!!!! pants: ARE THESE PLUMPERS FROM THE SUPERMARKET OR DID YOU GROW THEM IN YOUR GARDEN deuce: UNDEFINED
deuce
pants
#beating-off
#deuce-pants
#javascript
#plumpers
#strip-drought-2017
#woodring-stairs-background
6,682 6/24/2017 back on my bullshit
pants: THEY ARE SO COMING BACK!!!!! I'M GOING TO SIT ON THE PORCH AND WAIT (CAN YOU GET ME A SWEATER I'M COLD) (ALSO A BACKRUB WOULD BE NICE) deuce: NOTHING BESIDE REMAINS pants: AND IT WAS NEVER THE SAME AGAIN
deuce
pants
#back-on-my-bullshit
#backrub
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#ozymandias
#percy-bysshe-shelley
#piss
#urinal-background
6,683 6/25/2017 a pounding sensation
spigot: T PANTS DO YOU TAKE PULL REQUESTS pants: URRRRK SMALL PINCH spigot: NNNNNNNGGGGG YOU MAY FEEL A SLIGHT PRICK pants: A POUNDING SENSATION IN YOUR REAR END
pants
spigot
#bug-report
#git
#leisure-town
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
6,684 6/26/2017 lower back and neck pains
deuce: I THREW OUT MY BACK OUT TRYING TO BLOW MYSELF
deuce
#autofellatio
#deuce-solo
#injury
#mountain-background
#sad-deuce
#single-panel
#typo
6,685 6/27/2017 empty seat
pants: WHY WEREN'T YOU AT THE BEHEADING deuce: MY PAPERS ARE IN ORDER
deuce
pants
#beheading
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-stairs-background
6,686 6/28/2017 quietly and behind a curtain
pants: CAN I CHOKE IT DOWN WITHOUT CAUSING TROUBLE deuce: AS LONG AS YOU DO IT QUIETLY AND BEHIND A CURTAIN AND ONLY AFTER 5PM AND (127 MORE CONDITIONS FOLLOW) pants: BLOWING FUSES HERE
deuce
pants
#choke-it-down
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fuses
#woodring-field-background
6,687 6/29/2017 every building should have
spigot: EVERY BUILDING SHOULD HAVE A TOILET I CAN FLUSH MYSELF DOWN TO PORTAL ELSEWHERE
spigot
#buildings
#murder-suicide
#portal
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#toilet
#woodring-room-background
6,688 6/30/2017 you tell me
pants: I DON'T KNOW, WHAT DO YOU FEEL LIKE SUCKING deuce: A SAFE, NON-DANGEROUS, NON-GAY OBJECT deuce: A POPSICLE, SAY pants: MMM
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#not-gay
#piss-trough-background
#popsicle
6,689 7/1/2017 shift-reload
pants: WHAT KIND OF MONSTER ARE YOU spigot: A GUY ON A TRACK TO MANAGEMENT pants: SHIFT-RELOAD???????????? net: ZAP YOUR PRAM
net
pants
spigot
#huffy-pants
#macintosh
#net-pants-spigot
#sfw
#urinal-background
6,690 7/2/2017 sexual sadist
deuce: WE'LL TALK ABOUT ALL YOUR PROBLEMS (SEXUAL AND OTHERWISE!!!) TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: OH RIGHT pants: ALL THE SEXUAL PROBLEMS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#sexual-problems
#urinal-background
6,691 7/3/2017 colonel kurtz nespresso capsule
pants: WHICH PIPE IS THE ASS PIPE spigot: I PUSHED THE BUTTON FOR WHAT I THOUGHT WAS A DIRTPIPE MILKSHAKE BUT MAYBE IT NEEDS ANOTHER NESPRESSO CAPSULE pants: MUMMMMMMM WHIRRRRRRRRRR DOWN THE BLOCK AND AROUND THE CORNER AND THEN UP THE RIVER TO LOOK FOR COLONEL KURTZ spigot: WHY DID HE ALWAYS DRESS LIKE A LADY AND NOT WANT TO BE IN THE ARMY ANYMORE pants: HE WAS VERY SENSITIVE
pants
spigot
#apocalypse-now
#army
#asspipe
#coffee
#coy-pants
#crossdressing
#dirtpipe-milkshake
#heart-of-darkness
#mash
#nespresso
#pants-spigot
#spigot-points
#ts
#urinal-background
6,692 7/4/2017 hen
pants: THE OXFORD DONG deuce: YOUR INPUT IS APPRECIATED, HEN pants: NOW YOU'RE GETTING WITH IT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#grammar
#hen
#sfw
#typo
#white-background
6,693 7/5/2017 giant x's on my eyes
spigot: TURNS OUT I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! spigot: WAIT!!!!!!!! I DO spigot: NOPE, NOTHING TO SAY
spigot
#nothing-to-say
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,694 7/6/2017 jam jars
spigot: IS THAT SO???? WELL HERE'S WHAT I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THAT!!!!!! 10-12 MINUTES FLIPPING AROUND ATTEMPTING TO GET MY REAR-END TOPMOST deuce: I DON'T WANT TO GET OFF ON A RANT HERE BUT [TREMENDOUS, NON-STOP DIARRHEA] pants: CHOPPING OFF HEADS deuce: BEATING OFF INTO JAM JARS, SEALING THEM AS TIME CAPSULES pants: BLESSED BE spigot: TURNS OUT I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
deuce
pants
spigot
#beating-off
#beheading
#deuce-pants-spigot
#diarrhea
#funloving-nonsense
#lynnea
#nothing-to-say
#rant
#uncredited-character
#white-background
6,695 7/7/2017 no results
pants: FACIAL pants: WHERE CAN I GET A FACIAL pants: A FACIAL FOR MEN THAT IS NOT GAY pants: FIRST TIME FACIAL MEN TOTALLY STRAIGHT NOT GAY BEARD-O pants: MEN'S FACE CARE NOT GAY pants: FACIAL FOR A MAN WITH A BEARD NO PISS NOT GAY pants: +FACIAL -"STAR WARS" -"LORD OF THE RINGS" -"AVOCADO TOAST" pants: PLEASE WRITE BACK ONLY HERE UNTIL SATURDAY
pants
#avocado-toast
#facial
#funloving-nonsense
#lord-of-the-rings
#not-gay
#pants-solo
#piss
#search-query
#star-wars
#weird-pants-face
#white-background
#write-back
6,696 7/8/2017 that settles it
spigot: GOD SAID IT / I SUCKED ON IT / THAT SETTLES IT
spigot
#empty-auditorium-background
#god
#singing
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,697 7/9/2017 codpieces and dongbutters
spigot: CHRIST JESUS pants: YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH A LOT pants: LET ME GET YOU A DRINK WITH ABSOLUTELY NO ROOFIES IN IT
pants
spigot
#christ-jesus
#date-rape
#dongbutter
#drink
#drugs
#nuggh
#pants-spigot
#roofies
#woodring-room-background
6,698 7/10/2017 at me not on me
pants: I DIDN'T SPIT ON YOU I pants: OKAY WELL YES I SPIT ON YOU BUT I ONLY DID IT OUT OF DISGUST deuce: AT ME NOT ON ME deuce: YOU MISSED BUT YOUR INTENTION WAS CLEAR pants: MMMM YEAH OOOH BOY
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#deucegrin
#huffy-pants
#mmm-yeah-oooh-boy
#spit
#weird-pants-face
#woodring-room-background
6,699 7/11/2017 long heavy sigh
deuce: FUCK YOU PAY ME pants: THAT'S NOT pants: SIGHS, GETS OUT WALLET
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#deucegrin
#goodfellas
#huffy-pants
#somber-deuce
#white-background
6,700 7/12/2017 fierce and also fair
pants: GOD'S JUDGEMENT IS FIERCE AND ALSO FAIR AND A LITTLE BI deuce: JUST A LITTLE THOUGH pants: IT'S ENOUGH deuce: ENOUGH TO BE WORRYING pants: FURROWING MY BROW, MY WEINER'S BROW
deuce
pants
#bisexuality
#deuce-pants
#eyebrows-of-pants
#huffy-pants
#mouth
#theology
#urinal-background
#wiener
#wiener-eyebrows
6,701 7/13/2017 picture of a haunted concrete head
pants
#concrete
#haunted
#head
#picture
6,702 7/14/2017 important decisions
pants: T DEUCE WE HAVE SOME IMPORTANT DECISIONS TO CONSIDER: HAMBURGERS; CHEESEBURGERS; BOTH deuce: CHEESEBURGERS!!!! pants: EVERYTHING LOOKS IN ORDER TO ME STAMP STAMP STAMP FOLDER CLOSED
deuce
pants
#cheeseburgers
#dessert-cart
#deuce-pants
#hamburgers
#jean-charles
#papers-please
#sfw
#underwater
#urinal-background
6,703 7/15/2017 a bride of christ
spigot: T PANTS WILL YOU DO ME A SIMPLE KINDNESS AND MAKE A LIFELONG VIRGINITY PLEDGE TO JESUS AND BECOME A BRIDE OF CHRIST pants: T SPIGOT BURSTING INTO TEARS
pants
spigot
#jesus
#pants-spigot
#pledge
#religion
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,704 7/16/2017 warning/hard enough
pants: HEY DOES THIS LOOK HARD ENOUGH (FOR MY PLAYGIRL CENTERFOLD) spigot: [WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR UNIVERSAL AND ILLUMINATION ENTERTAINMENT'S DESPICABLE ME 3.]
pants
spigot
#despicable-me
#movies
#pants-spigot
#single-panel
#spoilers
#woodring-field-background
6,705 7/17/2017 a slave in a sex fdungeon
deuce: DEAR PROFESSIONAL, deuce: IMMEDIATE REQUIREMENT FOR THIS BELOW POSITION. deuce: IF YOU ARE INTERESTED, PLEASE DO SEND ME YOUR UPDATED RESUME ASAP. pants: A - ASAP pants: S - SIR PLEASE I AM A SLAVE IN A SEX FDUNGEON pants: A - ALREADY COVERED A SEE ABOVE pants: P - THE PEE TAPES ARE REAL pants: P - PLEASE HURRY THEY ARE MAKING ME SERVICE ANYBODY WITH A FEW BUCKS
deuce
pants
#acronym
#deuce-pants
#null
#recruiter-spam
#typo
#urinal-background
6,706 7/18/2017 a prune or a corn cob
spigot: EVERYONE AT MISSION FARMERS MARKET LOOKS LIKE A PRUNE OR A CORN COB deuce: N E V E R F O R G E T MY COCK pants: MAYBE SHOW THEM YOUR DONG AND ASK THEM IF THEY CAN TUG OUT SOME WEEDS spigot: WHERE DO I FLUSH MY CATS spigot: IF YOU GO TO THE BATHROOM ON A SIDEWALK THAT ISN'T DESIGNATED THEY CONFISCATE THE WHOLE THING UNTIL TRIAL AND EVEN THEN SOMETIMES YOU NEVER SEE IT AGAIN
deuce
pants
spigot
#bay-area
#deuce-pants-spigot
#gardening
#huffy-pants
#india
#obscene-gerund
#san-francisco
#urinal-background
6,707 7/19/2017 rentboys and tearooms
spigot: FOLKS THIS ONE-MAN SHOW SPONSORED IN PART BY LOOTCRATE AND TRUNKCLUB AND SHITHEAD AND SHINEBOX pants: AND VIEWERS LIKE YOU
pants
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#folks
#nerd-culture
#pants-spigot
#pbs
#product-placement
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,708 7/20/2017 get it on
pants: XOXO pants: CQCQ pants: GET IT ON pants: HEY UH pants: COULD YOU KEEP AN EYE ON MY PISSBAG pants: MAKE SURE NOBODY STEALS IT pants: BUT ALSO MAKE SURE IT DOESN'T MOTOR AWAY ON ITS OWN
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#funloving-nonsense
#ham-radio
#piss
#somber-deuce
#white-background
6,709 7/21/2017 awake for almost two hours
deuce: WELP I'VE BEEN AWAKE FOR ALMOST TWO HOURS TIME TO START DRINKING deuce: JEAN-CHARLES YOU FOOL, YOU CANNOT FUSE PROTIUM AT THAT TEMPERATURE AND PRESSURE AT ANY KIND OF SUBSTELLAR RATE !!!!!
deuce
#alcohol
#alcoholism
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#fusion
#jean-charles
#physics
#science
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#welp
#woodring-stairs-background
6,710 7/22/2017 completely empty
pants: JUST PLEASE GET UP AGAINST THE WALL WITH THE REST OF pants: YES LIKE THAT pants: GOOD, GOOD pants: OKAY BRB pants: THE PISS METHOD pants: THIS GLASS OF PISS IF HALF EMPTY!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: GULP GULP GULP deuce: NOW IT'S COMPLETELY EMPTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
deuce
pants
#black-background
#bored-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#funloving-nonsense
#piss
#weird-pants-face
6,711 7/23/2017 yorgle, grundle and rhindle being gay with each other
pants: "DEATH BY MISADVENTURE"
pants
#adventure
#atari-2600
#atari-vcs
#death
#dragon
#pants-solo
#urinal-background
6,712 7/24/2017 a chorus line
spigot: A CHORUS LINE OF PISSING DICKS spigot: CAN A MAN GET A DOO-DAH deuce: THE DICKS ARE KICKING THEIR LEGS IN SYNCHRONY (WHILE PISSING)
deuce
spigot
#camptown-races
#deuce-spigot
#piss
#sad-deuce
#somber-deuce
#woodring-field-background
6,713 7/25/2017 take on me
pants: BEAT / ME / OFFFFF deuce: NO / THANK / YOUUUUUUU
deuce
pants
#a-ha
#cancer
#deuce-pants
#mousehole
#singing
#take-on-me
#title-mismatch
#woodring-room-background
6,714 7/26/2017 serious interest
deuce: SERIOUS INTEREST IN MY SHITS spigot: IS THERE BUZZ YOU CAN USE TO LEVERAGE deuce: BETTER SHIT MORE pants: DEUCE SHIT KEYCHAIN [ADD TO BASKET] deuce: SHIT MERCH
deuce
pants
spigot
#business
#buzzwords
#deuce-pants-spigot
#merch
#okay-pants-face
#sad-deuce
#shit
#woodring-stairs-background
6,715 7/27/2017 is it typical for dentists
deuce: IS IT TYPICAL FOR DENTISTS TO "DIAGNOSE" YOU AS "GAY"
deuce
#dentist
#deuce-solo
#gay
#mountain-background
#single-panel
#usenet
6,716 7/28/2017 an autistic clock
spigot: EVEN AN AUTISTIC CLOCK IS RIGHT TWICE A DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA BONK DONK DONK DONK DONK DONK DONK DONK DONK DONK spigot: DONK DONK DONK pants: EVERYBODY NEEDS TO GO SIT IN THE CORNER AND SUCK THEIR OWN DICK FOR A WHILE
pants
spigot
#autism
#autofellatio
#dicksucking
#huffy-pants
#math
#pants-spigot
#physical-comedy
#woodring-den-background
6,717 7/29/2017 lab equipment, furniture
deuce: T PANTS YOU STICK THEM UP YOUR VAGINER pants: T DEUCE I WILL DO NO SUCH FOOMPTH THERE THEY GO deuce: FWOOP FWOOPFWOOP FWOOPFWOOP FWOOP SOME SORT OF NEGATIVE PRESSURE SUCKING THEM ON IN pants: PULL UP / PULL UP pants: SUCKING IN LAB EQUIPMENT, FURNITURE
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#foomph
#french
#gpws
#nuggh
#onomatopoeia
#pants-insertion
#science
6,718 7/30/2017 so many ways
pants: PISSGATE spigot: WHERE IS THAT POSITIONED AMONG THE AND GATES, NOT GATES, OR GATES, NOT-OR GATES, XAND GATES, NAND GATES AND AYN RAND GATES pants: UNCLEAR (CLOUDY) spigot: MUST HAVE A CLEAN DICKLICKING RECORD spigot: SO MANY WAYS TO READ THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pants
spigot
#ayn-rand
#electronics
#logic
#pants-spigot
#piss
#the-fountainhead-sucked
#white-background
6,719 7/31/2017 salt lick
pants: THE SPICE MUST FLOW deuce: WE GOTTA GET YOU A SALT LICK
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dune
#salt
#saltlick
#sfw
#single-panel
#spice
#urinal-background
6,720 8/1/2017 doing a bj
deuce: YOU'RE SOAKING IN IT !!!!!11 pants: I SURE AM spigot: KNEEL DEGRASSE TYSON (BECAUSE HE'S DOING A BJ)
deuce
pants
spigot
#blowjob
#deuce-pants-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#neil-degrasse-tyson
#palmolive
#pun
#soaking
#spigot-points
#tri-tip
#urinal-background
6,721 8/2/2017 where's spigot
pants: COMPARING PAYLOADS pants: CHECKSUMS MATCH pants: NOT A FORGERY deuce: ESCALATION CONFIRMED pants: TURN YOUR KEY pants: *SPIGOT* IS FURIOUSLY TYPING WHILE THE PEANUT GALLERY IS BACK ON THEIR BULLSHIT
deuce
pants
#back-on-my-bullshit
#deuce-pants
#green-background
#huffy-pants
#wargames
#weird-pants-face
6,722 8/3/2017 bienvenidos
spigot : BIENVENIDOS A MACINTOOSHEN
spigot
#apple
#german
#grey-background
#macintosh
#poo
#sfw
#single-panel
#spanish
#spigot-solo
#strip-drought-2017
#turtles
6,723 8/5/2017 peasants cheer
pants: T SPIGOT ARE YOU SAYING WE SHOULD-- [CHOPPED OFF HEAD FALLS NEATLY INTO BASKET, PEASANTS CHEER]
pants
spigot
#beheading
#bonequest-hi-fi
#cocks
#decapitation
#guillotine
#pants-spigot
#physical-comedy
#sfw
#single-panel
#violent-disapproval
#white-background
6,724 8/6/2017 the softer side of sears
spigot: FOLKS WE NEED TO SELL QUADRAS AND PERFORMAS AT SEARS NEXT TO THE WASHERS/DRYERS
spigot
#blue-background
#folks
#macintosh
#sears
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,725 8/7/2017 two thoughts
spigot: I ONLY HAVE LIKE TWO THOUGHTS spigot: SHOW TUNES AND THE COOKIE DRAWER
spigot
#cookie-drawer
#mousehole
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#woodring-room-background
6,726 8/8/2017 asking for the last time
spigot: T PANTS ASKING FOR THE LAST TIME SINCE YOU SEEM UNWILLING TO RESPOND: *DO YOU THINK BAILEY JAY HAS GAINED WEIGHT*
spigot
#bailey-jay
#deja-vu
#deuce-spigot
#nbsp
#porn
#sfw
#ts
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
6,727 8/9/2017 a very special announcement for 2017
spigot: I DID A POO IN THE PRINTER
spigot
#announcement
#grey-background
#poo
#printer
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,728 8/10/2017 somber salute
spigot: T E X T O P O L I S spigot: WILL BE THE NAME OF MY BBS / AE LINE deuce: YOUR GOPHER SITE spigot: MY WAFFLE, MY RED RYDER HOST, MY LAMBDA MOO/MUD/MURF/MINECRAFT deuce: MY FATWA spigot: MY LYCOS deuce: ALTA VISTA :SOMBER_SALUTE: spigot: YOU TOOK MY PREPARED ALTAVISTA REFERENCE, SO ALL I HAVE LEFT IS DEJA BLABSPACE deuce: THAT WORKS
deuce
spigot
#ascii-express
#bbs
#culture
#deja-blabspace
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#gopher
#internet
#internet-culture
#islam
#minecraft
#null
#search-engines
#sfw
#vintage-internet
#waffle
#woodring-field-background
#yellow-magic-orchestra
6,729 8/11/2017 the imbroglio
deuce: WHY CAN'T IT BE A KERFUFFLE spigot: A FLAP net: I GOT THE IMBROGLIO ONCE net: OK TWICE
deuce
net
spigot
#deuce-net-spigot
#filler-panel
#sfw
#woodring-stairs-background
6,730 8/12/2017 the needful
deuce: I LEAVE THIS ROOM FOR TWENTY SECONDS AND YOU'RE ALL NAKED AND SMEARING EACH OTHER WITH POO spigot: WILL GLADLY PERFORM THE NEEDFUL SCROLLBACK BUT I DO NOT RECALL THAT SCENARIO UNFOLDING
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#mousehole
#needful
#poo
#pricks
#single-panel
#woodring-room-background
6,731 8/13/2017 stubby golf pencils
pants: LICKY DICKY spigot: THERE'S BEEN A MURDER!!!!! HANDING OUT STUBBY GOLF PENCILS deuce: SHOVING BUT YET LOVING AT THE SAME TIME
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#golf
#high-res
#murder
#pencils
#single-panel
#woodring-stairs-background
6,732 8/14/2017 where is the love
deuce: OKAY BEDTIME deuce: NICE GALGHLAHGLAHG TALKING TO YOU GLAHGLAHGLAHG AS USUAL GLAHGLAHGLGHLAHGLAHGLAHGLAHGLAHGA deuce: HGLA
deuce
#black-background
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-solo
#dicklicking
#dipping
6,733 8/15/2017 shot on courthouse steps
pants: I WAS NOT BEATING OFF TO WRECK-IT RALPH I WAS JUST ADJUSTING MY UNDERGARMENTS IN THE HEAT OF THE DAY deuce: CASE DISMISSED pants: SHOT ON COURTHOUSE STEPS
deuce
pants
#court
#deuce-pants
#disney
#dubious-disclaimer
#law-and-order
#violence
#white-background
6,734 8/16/2017 maybe
spigot: ARE WE MAYBE STRAYING A BIT FROM GOD'S LIGHT
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#gods-light
#grey-background
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,735 8/17/2017 john carter of mars
deuce: T PANTS IN THE TAQUERIA WHERE I GOT THIS DELICIOUS BURRITO JOHN CARTER OF MARS WAS PLAYING ON THE TV (DUBBED IN SPANISH)
deuce
pants
#birthday-strip
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#disney
#food
#gay
#sfw
#single-panel
#true-story
#urinal-background
6,736 8/18/2017 john carter from mars toilet duck
deuce: T PANTS IN THE TAQUERIA WHERE I GOT THIS DELICIOUS BURRITO JOHN CARTER OF MARS WAS PLAYING ON THE TV (DUBBED IN SPANISH) pants: TOILET WAS APPROVED AS PART OF UNICODE 6.0 IN 2010 AND ADDED TO EMOJI 1.0 IN 2015. deuce: WHAT ABOUT A FUCKING DUCK pants: DUCK WAS APPROVED AS PART OF UNICODE 9.0 IN 2016 AND ADDED TO EMOJI 3.0 IN 2016.
deuce
pants
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#duck
#emoji
#huffy-pants
#multipants
#multiplicity
#title-mismatch
#toilet
#toilet-duck
#toilet-pig
#urinal-background
6,737 8/19/2017 southern belle accent
spigot: BATTERIES A SOMETIMES FOOD deuce: I DO DECLARE pants: MY WORD deuce: MY STARS!!! (SOUTHERN BELLE ACCENT)
deuce
pants
spigot
#accent
#deuce-pants-spigot
#deucegrin
#huffy-pants
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#stars-and-garters
#urinal-background
6,738 8/20/2017 childhood obesity and diabetes
spigot: FOLKS DID YOU HAVE ANY IDEA THAT SODA IS ESSENTIALLY PURE SUGAR AND LEADS TO CHILDHOOD OBESITY AND DIABETES AND DEPRESSION AND DICKLICKING ON THE MICHAEL'S CRAFTS CRAFTING CRUISE
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#crafts
#cruising
#diabetes
#dicklicking
#folks
#michaels
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#white-background
6,739 8/21/2017 you're my knight in shining armor
pants: YOU MIGHT SAY MY DICK IS FUN-SIZED deuce: IT'S NOT SO MUCH FUN AS IT IS FUNNY pants: NO LET'S GO WITH FUN-SIZED (HOPPING ON A QUICK CALL)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#fun-size
#quick-call
#urinal-background
#you-might-say
6,740 8/22/2017 mama i'm in love with a gangsta
deuce: MAMA, I'M IN LOVE WITH A GANGSTA deuce: MAMA, DID I MENTION I'M IN LOVE WITH A GANGSTA deuce: MAMA, YOU MAY RECALL EARLIER I STATED THAT I'M IN LOVE WITH A GANGSTA deuce: MAMA, I HATE TO BELABOR THE POINT, BUT I'D LIKE TO REITERATE THAT I'M... deuce: ...IN LOVE WITH A (GARROTED) deuce: WELP I PUT A SCREEN PROTECTOR ON MY NEW PHONE AND MANAGED TO FUCK IT UP SOMEHOW deuce: YOU'RE WELCOME, AMERICA spigot: ME AGAIN, GUESS WE'RE PLAYIN' PHONE TAG
deuce
spigot
#coolio
#deuce-spigot
#deucegrin
#gangsta
#gay-voicemail
#me-again
#mountain-background
#phone-tag
#title-mismatch
#violence
#voicemail
#welp
6,741 8/23/2017 go fuck yourself user
pants: `NOTE: UNNECESSARY USE OF -X OR --REQUEST, POST IS ALREADY INFERRED.` pants: WHY INFER WHEN YOU CAN IMPLY (SWISHY WRIST GLUGGING GIN) deuce: THAT'S BETTER THAN WE CHANGED THE WAY YOU SPECIFY OPTIONS COMPLETELY, GO FUCK YOURSELF USER
deuce
pants
#alcohol
#angry-panel
#coy-pants
#curl
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#gin
#go-fuck-yourself
#http
#programming
#ps
#unix
#urinal-background
6,742 8/24/2017 drink plenty of fluids
deuce: I HOPE THEY DON'T CUT OFF YOUR DONG (ACCIDENTALLY) pants: I CAN LIVE WITHOUT MY DONG BUT DON'T TAKE AWAY MY BIG FAT MOUTH
deuce
pants
#balls
#deuce-pants
#dong
#genital-mutilation
#mountain-background
#mouth-of-pants
#single-panel
6,743 8/25/2017 your pathetic human laws of addition
pants: HAHA deuce: HAHA pants: SO BY MY CALCULATIONS THAT'S HAHAHAHA deuce: HA'S DON'T FOLLOW YOUR PATHETIC HUMAN LAWS OF ADDITION
deuce
pants
#black-background
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#laughing-deuce
#math
#sfw
6,744 8/26/2017 chemicals and heavy metals
pants: A LITTLE PINCH spigot: A SLIGHT PRICK pants: A BRIEF POKE
pants
spigot
#adjectives
#cooking
#double-entendre
#gay
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#science
#sfw
6,745 8/27/2017 you have to stop clicking
deuce: BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM CLICK CLICK CLICK CLICK CLICK pants: CLICK CLICK CLICK QUIT CLICKING IT SO I CAN JAM THIS SPAM KEY IN THERE CLICK CLICK IF YOU WANT IT UNJAMMED YOU HAVE TO STOP CLICKING CLICK CLICK CLICK
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#high-res
#huffy-pants
#repetition
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,746 8/28/2017 no candles
pants: GET ON IT deuce: WOULD YOU CONSIDER BANGING A GONG deuce: OR DONGING A BONG net: OR WANGING A CHUNG deuce: LET'S LIGHT THIS CANDLE deuce: SHITTING A P pants: NO CANDLES (THEY BRING MOTHS)
deuce
net
pants
#ascii-art-farts
#deuce-net-pants
#deucegrin
#dongbongery
#moths
#music
#nasa
#neon-grid-background
#singing
#t-rex
#wang-chung
6,747 8/29/2017 surely
spigot: SURELY THE BEST USE OF MY TIME WILL SOMEDAY BE MADE CLEAR
spigot
#existential
#mountain-background
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,748 8/30/2017 sophisticated
pants: CRONCH CRONCH CRONCH I ONLY EAT TOP SHELF INSECTS deuce: THAT SHOWS YOU'RE SOPHISTICATED
deuce
pants
#cricket
#cronch
#deuce-pants
#github
#insect-eating
#plant
#sfw
#single-panel
#url
#woodring-field-background
6,749 8/31/2017 of all the shit in that paragraph
deuce: VISCERA WAS FOUNDED IN 1980 AS A LITERARY GUILD FOR HOMOSEXUAL WRITERS WITH AN INTEREST IN GAY VAMPIRE FICTION. WE NOW MAINTAIN THE BAY AREA'S LARGEST QUEER-BASED CONTEMPORARY EXPERIMENTAL LIBRARY OF ALL THINGS GAY AND VAMPIRE-RELATED! spigot: OF ALL THE SHIT IN THAT PARAGRAPH TO MAKE ME LAUGH IN 2017: spigot: BAY AREA
deuce
spigot
#bay-area
#black-background
#deuce-spigot
#meta
#null
#vampire
#viscera
6,750 9/1/2017 you appear to be someone who loves great journali
pants: YOU HAVE 5 FREE VIEWS REMAINING spigot: YOU APPEAR TO BE SOMEONE WHO LOVES GREAT JOURNALI ^C VIEW SOURCE > READ ARTICLE IN HTML
pants
spigot
#achoo
#pants-spigot
#paywall
#protip
#sfw
#sneeze
#white-background
6,751 9/2/2017 why are they both black
uncredited woman: THE BOTTOMS OF YOUR FEET ARE BLACK pants: YEAH, ONE OF THE CONNECTORS ON MY CHEST FELL OFF AND I STEPPED ON IT, THAT'S THE ADHESIVE uncredited woman: WHY ARE THEY BOTH BLACK pants: WELL, AFTER I GOT IT UNSTUCK FROM ONE FOOT, I STEPPED ON IT AGAIN WITH THE OTHER
pants
#anatomy
#coy-pants
#feet
#lava-lamp
#lynnea
#pants-solo
#poo
#prostitute
#sfw
#uncredited-character
#white-background
6,752 9/3/2017 nixon tapes
pants: [EXPLETIVE DEPICTING SEXUAL ACT] deuce: ARE WE READING THE NIXON TAPES NOW pants: THAT WAS IS REAL????? I THOUGHT IT WAS A MOVIE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#movies
#nixon
#olives
#piss-trough-background
6,753 9/4/2017 one-man show
deuce: WHY HAVEN'T ALL OF YOU HANGED YOURSELVES (AS PREVIOUSLY INSTRUCTED)
deuce
#deuce-solo
#empty-auditorium-background
#proper-grammar
#single-panel
#suicide
6,754 9/5/2017 get a funnel
pants: T DEUCE WILL BRINE SHRIMP SURVIVE THE VACUUM OF MY BUTTHOLE deuce: UNCLEAR pants: WELL GET A FUNNEL
deuce
pants
#anal
#deuce-pants
#first-time-anal
#pants-insertion
#porn
#sea-monkeys
#woodring-stairs-background
6,755 9/6/2017 right there on the dickbar
deuce: WHERE'S THE "TAKE A SHIT" BUTTON pants: IT'S RIGHT THERE ON THE DICKBAR
deuce
pants
#dessert-cart
#deuce-pants
#shit
#single-panel
#underwater
#urinal-background
#user-interface
6,756 9/7/2017 yup that's piss
pants: PISS-TESTING pants: SIP pants: YUP THAT'S PISS deuce: SOME MAY CALL IT URINE
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#piss
#urine
#watersports
#yellow-background
6,757 9/8/2017 exactly 11
pants: T DEUCE HELP ME OUT HERE I'M WRITING A POEM: HOW MANY DICKS DO YOU THINK BRAD PITT HAS TOUCHED deuce: 11 pants: I CAN WORK WITH THAT
deuce
pants
#brad-pitt
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#drunk-deuce
#poetry
#woodring-room-background
6,758 9/9/2017 almond roca
deuce: NOOOOOOOOOOOOORTH KOREA spigot: ALMOND ROCA / EN LA BOCA
deuce
spigot
#almond-roca
#chocolate
#deuce-spigot
#gay
#hallelujah
#korea
#piss
#singing
#single-panel
#snacks
#spanish
#white-background
6,759 9/10/2017 good day to you
deuce: SPLURP deuce: GOOD DAY TO YOU SIR/MADAME
deuce
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#white-background
6,760 9/11/2017 intercontinental house of prostitutes day
spigot: T PANTS IS WEDNESDAY INTERCONTINENTAL HOUSE OF PROSTITUTES DAY pants: T SPIGOT THE CALENDAR JUST SAYS CANADA DAY WITH A WINKING-EYE EMOJI
pants
spigot
#calendar
#canada
#coy-pants
#emoji
#grey-background
#ihop
#prostitutes
#single-panel
6,761 9/16/2017 guess who is back
pants: WELL THAT WAS FUN spigot: IF YOU SEE SOMETHING, SUCK SOMETHING
hanford
pants
spigot
#hanford-pants-spigot
#jerkocalypse-2017
#meta
#single-panel
#the-return
#white-background
6,762 9/17/2017 an unquenchable thirst for cock
spigot: T PANTS GUESS WHO COULDN'T POSSIBLY GIVE TWO SHITS THAT "HIS WEBSITES" ARE DOWN AND HAS TWO THUMBS AND IS ALSO THIS GUY spigot: WAIT I SCREWED THAT ONE UP deuce: I HAVE AN UNQUENCHABLE THIRST FOR ____ deuce: T SPIGOT WHAT PART OF VISCERA.BONERS.COM BEING DOWN IS NOT SINKING IN spigot: I'LL TAKE MY ANSWER NEVER
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#deucegrin
#fill-in-the-blank
#jerkocalypse-2017
#meta
#url
#viscera
#woodring-stairs-background
6,763 9/18/2017 a balanced breakfast
spigot: FOLKS YOU CAN'T JUST LICK DICK IN THE MORNING, YOU NEED A BALANCED BREAKFAST spigot: I'M ASKING YOU AS A PUBLIC FIGURE TO SHOEHORN YOUR DICKLICKING INTO THE EARLY AFTERNOON HOURS, OR EVEN THE AFTERNOON, MID-AFTERNOON, LATE AFTERNOON, EARLY EVENING, EVENING, TRADITIONAL NIGHT AND LATE-NIGHT HOURS spigot: COCKSUCKING JUST DO WHENEVS (THIS LEADS TO A CONVERSATION ABOUT TWILIGHT, DAWN AND DUSK)
spigot
#breakfast
#cocksucking
#dicklicking
#folks
#psa
#scheduling
#spigot-solo
#white-background
6,764 9/19/2017 nobody's business
deuce: OKAY GOING TO BED AND HOPEFULLY I WILL WAKE UP {{{ DEAD }}} deuce: I'M GONNA POO LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS TOMORROW I TELL YOU WHAT deuce: WAIT WAS THAT OUT LOUD deuce: GOTTA GO
deuce
#curly-braces
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#mountain-background
#poo
#somber-deuce
6,765 9/20/2017 spigot left, spigot right
spigot: SPIGOT LEFT spigot: SPIGOT RIGHT spigot: SPIGOT LICKING A / spigot: DICK ALL NIGHT spigot: HE'S A WAITER spigot: MASTURBATOR spigot: SON OF A BITCH / I'M DOWN A CRATER
#actor-positioning
#dicklicking
#down-a-crater
#irc
#rhyming
#singing
#spigot-points
#spigot-solo
#waiter
#white-background
6,766 9/21/2017 a wormhole to another region of spacetime
pants: CAN I DRAG AND DROP MY BONER ONTO MY OTHER BONER pants: A TEAR IN THE FABRIC OF SPACE AND TIME AND OTHER BONERS deuce: QUERY: WHAT IS YOUR OTHER BONER deuce: IS IT AN EINSTEN-ROSEN BRIDGE OR A WORMHOLE TO ANOTHER REGION OF SPACETIME WHERE THERE ARE MORE BONERS OR JUST A TEAR AND OTHER BONERS NEAR THE TEAR pants: THE BONER ONE
deuce
pants
#boner
#deuce-pants
#science
#urinal-background
#user-interface
6,767 9/22/2017 nitrites, nitrates
deuce: I THINK WE SHOULD HAVE A HEART TO HEART ABOUT YOUR PACKAGE (ADDRESSED TO NO ONE IN PARTICULAR) pants: NITRITES ARE DIFFERENT THAN NITRATES
deuce
pants
#chemistry
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#discussion
#nitrate
#nitrite
#nitrogen
#oxidation-states
#package
#science
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,768 9/23/2017 the weather control machine
pants: T DEUCE IT'S NOT MY FAULT MAN pants: T DEUCE I CAN'T CONTROL THE WEATHER (DESPERATELY TRYING TO PULL A SHEET OVER THE WEATHER CONTROL MACHINE, TUGGING ON ONE CORNER ONLY UNCOVERS THE OTHER) deuce: T PANTS I DON'T BELIEVE YOU deuce: I SEE (CLUELESSLY MISSES THE FAILED ATTEMPT TO HIDE THE WEATHER CONTROL MACHINE)
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#mad-science
#sfw
#urinal-background
#wacky-antics
#weather-control
6,769 9/24/2017 a few extra to cover my future mistakes
deuce: HURGLE GURGLE deuce: HITLER WAS RIGHT deuce: GURGLE BURGLE deuce: (THAT'S THE TOILET TALKING, TOTALLY NOT ME deuce: ) deuce: ) : DEUCE HAS BEEN SENDING MESSAGES TO YOU TOO RAPIDLY, AND IS NOW BEING IGNORED.
deuce
#blank-panel
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#empty-panel
#hitler
#sfw
#toilet
#too-rapidly
#urinal-background
#whitespace
6,770 9/25/2017 huge holes in the walls
pants: T DEUCE THE SMOKE DETECTORS ARE LISTENING TO EVERYTHING YOU SAY BETTER REMOVE THEM pants: T DEUCE HOW CAN YOU FIND ALL THE HIDDEN LISTENING DEVICES IF YOU DON'T MAKE HUGE HOLES IN THE WALLS deuce: THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR
deuce
pants
#black-background
#decorum
#deuce-pants
#font
#internet-of-things
#paranoia
#privacy
#sfw
#software
6,771 9/26/2017 this promise ring
spigot: T PANTS WILL YOU PROMISE ME YOU'LL WATCH TWIN PEAKS AT LEAST THROUGH EP 8 spigot: AND WILL YOU WEAR THIS PROMISE RING spigot: YOUR ROBE IS SLIGHTLY OPEN FYI
pants
spigot
#dong
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#promise-ring
#television
#twin-peaks
6,772 9/27/2017 what puerto rico needs right now
spigot: FOLKS I THINK WE KNOW WHAT PUERTO RICO NEEDS RIGHT NOW, AND THAT IS THE AMATEUR RADIO COMMUNITY
spigot
#current-events
#folks
#ham-radio
#radio
#sfw
#silent-key
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#urinal-background
6,773 9/28/2017 repent
deuce: WE WILL STILL DIE pants: WHAT IF WE REPENT
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#existential
#high-res
#religion
#single-panel
#somber-deuce
#white-background
6,774 9/29/2017 q3 2017 important announcement
deuce: THE MUPPET SHOW THEME IS GOING THROUGH MY HEAD AND I'D LIKE IT TO STOP (PSA)
deuce
#announcement
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-solo
#earworm
#mousehole
#muppets
#psa
#quick-call
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-room-background
6,775 9/30/2017 exactly where i was
spigot: I STILL REMEMBER EXACTLY WHERE I WAS WHEN I FIRST LEARNED BELLADONNA'S ASS WAS HAUNTED deuce: BY A BASEBALL BAT spigot: A DIRTPIPE MILKSHAKE IS LIKE RIDING A BIKE deuce: ONCE YOU GET ONE YOU IMMEDIATELY CRASH IT INTO A TREE spigot: I'M SAYING: IS IT KRISTINA, KRISZTINA, KRIZTINA, CHRISTINA, OR CRISTINA BELLA deuce: ALL OF THE ABOVE
deuce
spigot
#bat
#bat-up-ass
#belladonna
#bicycle
#dirtpipe-milkshake
#extreme-insertions
#frog
#frog-tips
#haunted-ass
#multiple-choice
#pants-spigot
#porn
#somber-deuce
#urinal-background
6,776 10/1/2017 none of this matters
deuce: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE SAYING spigot: NONE OF THIS MATTERS
deuce
spigot
#black-background
#deuce-spigot
#existential
#nihilism
#sfw
#single-panel
6,777 10/2/2017 lieutenant commander worf of the federation starship u.s.s. enterprise
spigot: JUST SO I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT: IS WORF A TRIPHTHONG deuce: NO, BUT DATA IS A HOMONYM spigot: SORRY: IS LIEUTENANT COMMANDER WORF A DIPTHONG
deuce
spigot
#angry-panel
#data
#deuce-spigot
#diphthong
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#homonym
#language
#linguistics
#science-fiction
#sfw
#star-trek
#television
#worf
6,778 10/3/2017 sheet cakes
deuce: WHO WEARS SHORT SHORTS spigot: PERSONALLY AND PROFESSIONALLY I DO NOT DARE deuce: ZARDOZ OUTFIT spigot: SHEETCAKES
deuce
spigot
#angry-panel
#deuce-spigot
#food
#martyrdom
#movies
#music
#sean-connery
#stall
#urinal-background
#zardoz
6,779 10/4/2017 frog eggs
deuce: WHY ARE YOU STILL UP pants: COUNTING FROG EGGS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#frog
#sfw
#single-panel
#urinal-background
6,780 10/7/2017 this isn't doing shit
pants: LIGHT MY DICK ON FIRE AND TAKE A PUFF deuce: IS IT AN INTOXICANT pants: PROBABLY deuce: GONNA NEED A MORE DEFINITE ANSWER THAN THAT pants: AUDIENCE BOOS deuce: REQUIRE PEER-REVIEWED STUDIES deuce: WITH CONTROLLED DOUBLE-BLIND EXPERIMENTS pants: YOU'LL LOOK COOL WITH IT IN YOUR MOUTH deuce: WELL I'M CONVINCED POK POK POK POK deuce: THIS ISN'T DOING SHIT POK POK POK POK
deuce
pants
#cocksucking
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drugs
#genital-mutilation
#pok
#science
#smoking
#urinal-background
6,781 10/8/2017 clonk ba-donk
spigot: IT'S JAMES FRANCO AND JAMES FRANCO spigot: LITERALLY TWO TIMES THE FRANCO spigot: FRANCO FOLLOWED BY A BONUS FRA spigot: :PHONE: CLONK BA-DONK spigot: TEN MORE CHURCHILL MOVIES SHOULD HELP
spigot
#black-background
#bonus
#churchill
#emoji
#james-franco
#jews
#movies
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#yom-kippur
6,782 10/9/2017 std
deuce: SO ARE WE ALL WATCHING STAR TREK: DISCOVERYYYYYYY (VOICE SLOWLY FADES AS HE FALLS DOWN THE WELL)
deuce
#deuce-solo
#hamburgers
#sfw
#single-panel
#space-nuts-background
#star-trek
#std
#television
#violent-disapproval
6,783 10/10/2017 robot problems
spigot: WHY DOES THAT ROBOT KEEP SAYING I'M A REAL PERSON, CUT IT OUT, ETC
spigot
#grey-background
#meta
#physical-comedy
#robot
#sfw
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,784 10/11/2017 puffy around the waist area
pants: I WEAR ADULT DIAPERS deuce: NOT BECAUSE YOU NEED TO, YOU JUST THINK THEY'RE FASHIONABLE pants: RIGHT pants: THEY REALLY MAKE MY DOCKERS LOOK PUFFY AROUND THE WAIST AREA
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#diapers
#dockers
#frog
#frog-tips
#sfw
#woodring-room-background
6,785 10/12/2017 like dorf on golf
pants: THE FORMAT OF THE FILES IN `/VAR/NAMED/NAMEDB` ARE SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT THAN WHAT WE'RE USED TO, NOTE THE STUPID FAT GAY `@` HANGING AROUND LOOKIN' FOR DICK LIKE DORF ON GOLF deuce: LOOKS THE SAME TO MY GOBBLY EYES
deuce
pants
#bind
#cruising
#deuce-pants
#dns
#dorf
#information-technology
#shit
#single-panel
#unix
#white-background
6,786 10/13/2017 more to go on
spigot: I NEED MORE TO GO ON THAN JUST YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH deuce: HAIL pants: WELL MET
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#q-tip
#renaissance-faire
#somber-deuce
#urinal-background
6,787 10/14/2017 o(n)
deuce: T PANTS MY BALLS ARE O(N) pants: T DEUCE MMM
deuce
pants
#balls
#big-o-notation
#black-background
#computer-science
#deuce-pants
#deuces-balls
#high-res
#nuts-of-deuce
#programming
#single-panel
6,788 10/15/2017 cocks and dancing
pants: COCKS deuce: AGREED pants: DANCING deuce: YES deuce: WE MUST
deuce
pants
#cocks
#dancing
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#low-res
#woodring-field-background
6,789 10/16/2017 burgeoning with strange forms of life
deuce: BRAVO pants: I NEVER WANT TO FORGET THAT PHRASE deuce: THAT IS ONE OF THE STRANGER THINGS TO GRACE THIS BLUE-GREEN WATER WORLD BURGEONING WITH STRANGE FORMS OF LIFE deuce: ALSO I SHIT MY PANTS pants: SAME
deuce
pants
#aliens
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#fecal-incontinence
#huffy-pants
#neon-grid-background
#same
#soiling-myself
6,790 10/17/2017 plopping it into the water
pants: WAS RE: DIPPING MY PENCIL THIN DONG INTO THE OLD MURKY WATERS pants: RE: RE: RE: PLOPPING IT INTO THE WATER AND LET IT DRINK pants: ORIGINAL SUBJECT: GENTLY PLACING MY GENITALS INTO THE SHRIMP TANK FOR IMMORAL PURPOSES
pants
#boners
#coy-pants
#dick-drinking
#pants-solo
#piss-trough-background
#was-re
6,791 10/18/2017 eponyrideinprogress
pants: T DEUCE GET READY TO RIDE MY PONY deuce: IS IT A GOOD PONY deuce: A RIGHTEOUS PONY pants: SURE pants: T SPIGOT GET READY TO RIDE MY PONY AFTER DEUCE IS DONE deuce: `EPONYRIDEINPROGRESS`
deuce
pants
spigot
#deuce-pants-spigot
#mountain-background
#pony
6,792 10/19/2017 destination: dongs
spigot: DESTINATION: DONGS pants: CHRIST IS LORD pants: GET IT ON pants: TALK ME DOWN, TALK ME OFF
pants
spigot
#boners
#christ
#christ-is-lord
#deja-vu
#pants-spigot
#religion
#talk-me-off
#woodring-stairs-background
6,793 10/20/2017 protocol violation
pants: DICKS deuce: DICKS pants: DICKS deuce: COCKS [PROTOCOL VIOLATION]
deuce
pants
#camelcase
#deuce-pants
#jimmy-kimmel
#protocol
#woodring-field-background
6,794 10/21/2017 when it comes to detecting shit
deuce: THIS IS THE SHITTIEST SHIT THAT HAS EVER BEEN SHIT (AND I'M A PRO WHEN IT COMES TO DETECTING SHIT SINCE I'VE SHIT SHIT FOR A SHITTILY LONG TIME)
deuce
#deuce-solo
#high-res
#hospital-background
#repetition
#shit
#single-panel
6,795 10/22/2017 all the moves
pants: I'M THE GROPEMASTER pants: GRAB TWIST YANK TUG PULL I'VE GOT ALL THE MOVES
pants
#grab
#grey-background
#groping
#pants-solo
#pull
#sexual-assault
#tug
#twist
#yank
6,796 10/23/2017 your licking dick name
spigot: FOLKS YOUR LICKING DICK NAME IS YOUR FIRST NAME PLUS YOUR LAST NAME
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#dicklicking
#folks
#grey-background
#high-res
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
6,797 10/24/2017 by mistake
pants: HAVE YOU EVER RETIRED A HUMAN BY MISTAKE deuce: NOPE pants: WELL, OKAY
deuce
pants
#blade-runner
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#sfw
6,798 10/25/2017 rise and shine
deuce: RISE AND SHINE, FUCKERS spigot: NO THANKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! deuce: FINE!!!!!!!!!
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#exclamation-points
#filename
#grey-background
#musical
#punctuation
#torrent
6,799 10/26/2017 the duke of new york
pants: DICKS pants: EXCUSE ME BUT YOU ARE THE DUKE OF NEW YORK (YOU ARE A-NUMBER-ONE) pants: DICKS deuce: GO ON pants: I CAN DO NOTHING FOR YOU SON pants: DICKS pants: (ECHOLOCATION) deuce: STAY OUT OF MY VAGINA pants: USA OUT OF YOUR VAGINA
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#escape-from-new-york
#grey-background
#huffy-pants
#kurt-russell
#sinatra
#true-grit
#weird-pants-face
6,800 10/27/2017 who's taking a knee for that shit
spigot: MEANWHILE I REACH FOR THE HALF AND HALF AT STARBUCKS AND (SURPRISE) IT'S EMPTY
spigot
#current-events
#green-background
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#starbucks
6,801 10/28/2017 guerrilla warfare
pants: WE SHALL BEAT THEM OFF AT THE SHORES. WE SHALL BEAT THEM OFF AT THE BEACHES deuce: AND IN THE HILLS pants: SURE, THERE TOO I GUESS deuce: SEE HE WAS SAYING THEY'D RESORT TO GUERRILLA WARFARE AGAINST THE NAZIS... deuce: ...IN ORDER TO BEAT THEM OFF panst: WHATEVER IT TAKES (TO GET THEM TO BLOW THEIR NAZI LOADS)
deuce
pants
#churchill
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#handjob
#history
#nazi
6,802 10/29/2017 white house down
deuce: T PANTS YOU'RE RIGHT IT WAS CALLED WHITE HOUSE DOWN I AM SO SORRY FOR DOUBTING YOU WHILE YOU WERE COOKING ME FOOD
deuce
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#high-res
#movies
#sfw
#single-panel
#white-house-down
6,803 10/30/2017 but why
deuce: TOUCH IT pants: BUT WHY pants: WHY deuce: DON'T ASK JUST DO pants: BUT I HAVE MANY QUESTIONS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#grey-background
#sfw
6,804 10/31/2017 hail to the chief
spigot: BIG / FUCKIN' / DICKS / IN / YOUR STUPID / FUCKIN' / FACE / NOW spigot: (HAIL TO THE CHIEF)
spigot
#deja-vu
#grey-background
#hail-to-the-chief
#null
#singing
#spigot-solo
6,805 11/1/2017 tonight's better for me
spigot: YOU CAN LICK MY DICK OR STAY LATE TONIGHT pants: I WILL STAY LATE TONIGHT spigot: OKAY, YOU'LL BE LICKING MY DICK TONIGHT pants: GUESS I'LL LICK IT NOW spigot: TONIGHT'S BETTER FOR ME
pants
spigot
#dicklicking
#fill-in-the-blank
#pants-spigot
#urinal-background
6,806 11/2/2017 makes ya think
DEUCE: UHUHUHUHUHUHUHUHUH RASTERIZING CORN
deuce
#bonequest-hi-fi
#computer-graphics
#corn
#deuce-solo
#drunk-deuce
#mountain-background
#sfw
#single-panel
6,807 11/3/2017 down there in my dirty clothes
pants: WHAT ARE YOU DOING DOWN THERE IN MY DIRTY CLOTHES pants: HI THERE HELLO pants: FUCKING LOOK AT ME
pants
#dicklicking
#dirty-clothes
#huffy-pants
#laundry
#pants-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,808 11/4/2017 round two
: Originally published on October 29, 1996 pants: OKAY YOU'RE THE SHIT MAN AND I EAT SHIT deuce: DING pants: WE'RE SET FOR LIFE deuce: ROUND TWO
deuce
pants
#caption
#coprophagia
#deuce-pants
#october
#originally-published
#shit
#urinal-background
6,809 11/5/2017 whatever is more racist
pants: WELL I'M BORED pants: SOMEBODY ENTERTAIN ME pants: IN THE WORST WAY POSSIBLE pants: IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT HERE pants: A DICKLICKING SESSION IN PROGRESS pants: WHAT TO DO, WHAT TO DO spigot: I WILL SEE YOUR HONK AND RAISE YOU A BONK spigot: AND SOMETHING INVOLVING A DONK??? A CHONK??? WHATEVER IS MORE RACIST
pants
spigot
#deja-vu
#grey-background
#honk
#pants-spigot
#raise-you-a
#rhyming
#sfw
6,810 11/6/2017 going around the room
pants: SO pants: WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING TO CELEBRATE EL NINO pants: I'LL BE LICKING
deuce
pants
rands
spigot
#coy-pants
#drunk-deuce
#holiday
#sfw
#uncensored
#urinal-background
#weather
6,811 11/7/2017 oh probably
deuce: WHAT ABOUT MARTIAN DICKS pants: WHAT IF YOU STOPPED TIME AND BROKE YOUR NECK TRYING TO LICK YOUR OWN DICK pants: ARE WE JUST ALL STUCK THE
deuce
pants
#alexa
#aliens
#autofellatio
#deuce-pants
#dicklicking
#drunk-deuce
#injury
#porn
#urinal-background
6,812 11/8/2017 jerkoff smurf
pants: J/O bung: I LIKE THE SMURFS bung: WHICH SMURF DO YOU LIKE? pants: J/O bung: I DON'T KNOW J/O SMURF. WHAT DOES HE DO? pants: J/O
bung
pants
#bung-pants
#jerking-off
#smurf
#urinal-background
6,813 11/9/2017 butt hen
pants: T DEUCE WHAT'S A BUTT HEN deuce: T PANTS WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME pants: T DEUCE WELL I SURE AS HELL DON'T KNOW deuce: I'M GOING TO END THIS CONVERSATION BY CASUALLY TURNING MY HEAD AWAY NOW pants: BUTT HEN deuce: WHO SAID THAT !?!?!? WAS IT THE WIND ?!?!?!?!?!??! pants: BUTT HEN (QUIETER) deuce: I CAN'T HEAR YOU ?!??!?! (pants): BUTT HEN
deuce
pants
#butt-hen
#chicken
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#grey-background
#sfw
#whispering
6,814 11/10/2017 729
: Left: "pants" (angry) : Right: "deuce" (angry) pants: OH FUCK IT AHUGLAHGLUAHGLUAHG LUAHGLUAHGLAHGLA HGLAHGLAHGLAHGL (NINE TIMES NINE TIMES NINE) deuce: MATH IS HARD deuce: (SO AM I)
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#boner
#caption
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#fat
#huffy-pants
#math
#stage-directions
#woodring-stairs-background
6,815 11/11/2017 you'd think so huh
deuce: DONGS pants: YOU'D THINK SO HUH pants: BUT I CHECKED pants: AND NONE ARE TO BE FOUND pants: O UNTIMELY DEATH
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dongs
#king-lear
#shakespeare
#urinal-background
6,816 11/11/2017 re: regression in 4.14-rc2 caused by apparmor: add base infastructure for socket mediation
pants: STOP GTHIS F*CKING IDIOCY ALREADY! MMM DUH pants: AS FAR AS THE KERNEL IS CONCERNED, A REGRESSIONS IS THE KERNEL NOT GIVING THE SAME END RESULT WITH THE SAME USER SPACE GHLAHGLAHGLUHALG GOOD LORD MEN HAULGUHLAG pants: THE REGRESSION WAS IN THE KERNEL. YOU TRYING TO SHIFT THE REGRESSIONS SOMEWHERE ELSE IS BOGUS SHIT BRRRRR MMM YEAH OOOH BOY pants: AND SERIOUSLY, IT'S THE KIND OF GARBAGE THAT MAKES ME THINK YOUR OPINION AND YOUR CODE CANNOT BE RELIED ON OOH BALLS HLAGHUAHGLAG DUH pants: IF YOU ARE NOT WILLING TO ADMIT THAT YOUR COMMIT 651E28C5537A ("APPARMOR: ADD BASE TO INFASTRUCTURE FOR SOCKET MEDIATION") CAUSED A REGRESSION, THEN HONESTLY, I DON'T WANT TO GET COMMITS FROM YOU FAT FARTS AHOY pants: IT'S THAT SIMPLE. pants: I'M *VERY* UNHAPPY WITH THE SECURITY LAYER AS IS, THE LAST THING I WANT TO SEE IS SOME SECURITY LAYER DEVELOPER THAT THEN GOES ON TO TRY TO RE-DEFINE WAS REGRESSION MEANS HLGAHGULAHGLUAG EATING IT ALL HALGHULAGUG pants: פOOp ˥Oɹp I,W ∩ԀSIpƎ pOMN SƎ┴∩ԀS ┴H∀┴ IS ∀ ɹƎפɹƎSSION OH IℲ ⅄O∩ qɹƎ∀ʞ ƎXIS┴INפ ∩SƎɹ SԀ∀ƆƎ pants: IT'S NOT OK TO SAY "BUT WE'LL FIX THE USER SPACE SETUP" GARK GARK GARK GARK pants: IT'S THAT SIMPLE. pants: REALLY. NOT OK. pants: I THINK I WILL HAVE TO REVERT THAT GARBAGE, FOR THE SIMPLE REASON THAT I REFUSE TO HAVE CODE IN THE KERNEL FROM MAINTAINERS THAT CANNOT EVEN UNDERSTAND THE FIRST RULE OF KERNEL DEVELOPMENT HALGHLAUGHLUHGLUAG I EAT POO HALGHUALG pants: THE FIRST RULE IS: -WE DON'T CAUSE REGRESSIONS SMOOSHING AND SMEARING IT pants: AND THE COROLLARY IS THAT WHEN REGRESSIONS *DO* OCCUR, WE ADMIT TO THEM AND FIX THEM, INSTEAD OF BLAMING USER SPACE FUCK SHIT FUCK FUCK I'M GOIN' DOWN pants: THE FACT THAT YOU HAVE APPARENTLY BEEN DENYING THE REGRESSION NOW FOR THREE WEEKS MEANS THAT I WILL REVERT, AND I WILL SOP PULLING APPARMOR REQUESTS UNTIL THE PEOPLE INVOLVED UNDERSTAND HOW KERNEL DEVELOPMENT IS DONE MMMM DUH WET ONES
linus
#bug-report
#gark
#linus-torvalds
#linux
#lkml
#mmm-yeah-oooh-boy
#overlong
#pants-solo
#rotation
#security
#smearing
#smooshing
#typo
#urinal-background
6,817 11/12/2017 so nobody can use it
spigot: T DEUCE REVENGE IS A DISH BEST SERVED UP IN ONLINE WEBZINE FORMAT deuce: I DON'T GET IT spigot: WEB = WORLD WIDE WEB, ZINE = MAGAZINE spigot: FORMAT = FORMAT THE INTERNET SO NOBODY CAN USE IT
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#sfw
#star-trek
#urinal-background
#webzine
#wrath-of-khan
#zine
6,818 11/13/2017 very beautiful and interesting
spigot: OH, YOU WERE MOLESTED?? YOU MUST BE VERY BEAUTIFUL AND INTERESTING
spigot
#bonequest-hi-fi
#current-events
#molestation
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#woodring-field-background
6,819 11/14/2017 i said everybody
pants: EVERYBODY NEEDS TO STOP WHAT THEY'RE DOING AND SUCK A DICK deuce: AGREED pants: AHEM I SAID EVERYBODY
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dicksucking
#mountain-background
6,820 11/15/2017 church shootings
spigot: :LOL: CHURCH SHOOTINGS pants: THEY CANCEL EACH OTHER OUT deuce: HOW CAN YOU LAUGH AT SOMETHING SO COMPLETELY HILARIOUS
deuce
pants
spigot
#background-debut
#church-shootings
#current-events
#deuce-pants-spigot
#nu-urinal-background
#somber-deuce
6,821 11/16/2017 a place of deep and profound pain
(spigot): PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT COMEDY FREQUENTLY COMES FROM A PLACE OF DEEP AND PROFOUND PAIN RIGHT HERE IN MY DONG AREA
spigot
#comedy
#english-as-a-second-language
#psychology
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#whisper
#white-background
6,822 11/17/2017 both sides
spigot: FOLKS WE NEED A SHORT FAT CAMEL TYPE DEAL WITH RINKY-DINK CHOPSTICK LEGS AND ABSOLUTELY NOTHING GOING ON INSIDE 📯 pants: WHICH SIDE DO I FUCK deuce: BE SERIOUS deuce: BOTH SIDES
deuce
pants
spigot
#blue-background
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants-spigot
#emoji
#folks
#postal-horn
#somber-deuce
#thurn-und-taxis
#trystero
6,823 11/18/2017 two stupid legs
spigot: 📯📯📯📯 spigot: WELL AT LEAST IT'S GOT TWO STUPID LEGS spigot: HOPE IT WINS THE TURKEY TROT
spigot
#emoji
#postal-horn
#sfw
#spigot-solo
#turkey-trot
#woodring-stairs-background
6,824 11/19/2017 potato tostones
pants: TAKE A RUBBER MALLET FROM pants: HARDWARE STORE-HAVE ONE THAT'S EXCLUSIVE FOR KITCHEN, pants: FLATTEN THE POTATOES WITH MALLET
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#caveman
#cooking
#grey-background
#pants-solo
#potato
#recipe
#sfw
6,825 11/20/2017 like a crabby crab crab
deuce: LET'S FACE IT: WHO DOESN'T PINCH ON DICKS LIKE A CRABBY CRAB CRAB pants: I GOTTA FIND THE ORIGIN OF THAT PHRASE deuce: IT WAS SOME CHICK POSTING AN EXAMPLE OF HER ANONYMOUS DIRECT MESSAGES pants: OTHERWISE: FRESH HOT BACON IS ALL I SEE, MY BABBY DEAD, BERNSTAIN BEARS, JULIA ROBERTS IS ACTUALLY A MOVIE STAR SOMEHOW deuce: NELSON MANDELA BECAME PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES pants: AND THE HOME / OF THE / BRAVE [STATIC]
deuce
pants
#bacon
#brad
#chad
#crabby-crab-crab
#deuce-pants
#email
#francis-scott-key
#mandela-effect
#prose
#request
#series
#thad
#urinal-background
6,826 11/21/2017 rubber bands on my claws
deuce: DOES U PINCH ON ETC. pants: I WOULD IF YOU HADN'T PUT RUBBER BANDS ON MY CLAWS
deuce
pants
#black-background
#clipart
#crabby-crab-crab
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#inebriated-crustacean
#rubber-band
#series
#sfw
#single-panel
6,827 11/22/2017 ablgk blgth
spigot: E EQUALS M C SQUIRTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ABLGK 💦 BLGTH
spigot
#einstein
#emoji
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#squirt
#upskirt
#urinal-background
6,828 11/23/2017 a culture which allows sexual harrassment to continue
spigot: T DEUCE DO YOU EVER REFLECT ON HOW WE PASSIVELY PARTICIPATE IN A CULTURE WHICH ALLOWS SEXUAL HARRASSMENT TO CONTINUE deuce: T SPIGOT SHOW US YOUR TITS
deuce
spigot
#current-events
#deuce-spigot
#feminism
#nu-urinal-background
#sexual-harassment
#single-panel
6,829 11/24/2017 i would like to know more please
pants: PISS deuce: I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW MORE pants: PISS!!!!!!!! deuce: THAT DOES NOT CONTAIN ADDITIONAL INFORMATION
deuce
pants
#alligator
#caption
#clipart
#deuce-pants
#jean-charles
#piss
#prose
#somber-deuce
#washing-machine
#white-background
6,830 11/25/2017 the machinery groans and stalls
pants: I AM TOO FAT TO SIT ON THE HORSEY, THE ROCKET SHIP pants: THE MACHINERY GROANS AND STALLS spigot: HASN'T THAT DONALD DUCK SPRING BROKEN YET
pants
spigot
#disney
#pants-spigot
#playground
6,831 11/26/2017 honk honk honk honnnnnk
pants: SHARP HONKS AS MY HEAD IS POUNDED AGAINST THE STEERING WHEEL
pants
#car
#honk
#pants-solo
#physical-comedy
#sfw
#single-panel
#violence
#woodring-den-background
6,832 11/27/2017 if wishes were horses
deuce: MY HEART SAYS NEVER TO POO AGAIN pants: WHAT DOES YOUR TOILET SAY deuce: IT SAYS IF WISHES WERE HORSES pants: HOLY SHIT ARE WISHES HORSES deuce: NO IT'S A SAYING deuce: THE FULL SAYING IS: IF WISHES WERE HORSES, I'D SUCK THAT DICK pants: WHAT IF I WISH FOR A HORSE AND GET THE HORSE deuce: THAT WOULD BE YOU WISHING FOR A HORSES, NOT WISHES BEING HORSES (I MEAN DUH???) deuce: HOWEVER YOU'D STILL HAVE TO SUCK THAT DICK pants: IF WE MAKE WISHES HORSES THEN DO HORSES BECOME SOMETHING ELSE pants: LIKE THOSE LITTLE PUMPKIN CANDIES THAT ONLY COME OUT AROUND HALLOWEEN pants: I COULD SURE GO FOR ONE BAG OF THOSE RIGHT NOW (TWO BAGS) pants: NUMEROUS SHOTS FIRED
deuce
pants
#candy-corn-pumpkin
#clipart
#deuce-pants
#deucegrin
#drunk-deuce
#halloween
#halloween-candy
#horse
#huffy-pants
#nu-urinal-background
#pumpkin
#pumpkin-candy
#shots-fired
#somber-deuce
#violent-disapproval
#weird-pants-face
6,833 11/28/2017 be honest
pants: DO THESE FISHNETS MAKE ME LOOK EASY
pants
#coy-pants
#fishnets
#mountain-background
#pants-solo
#photoshop
#single-panel
6,834 11/29/2017 such are balls
deuce: T PANTS WOLFENSTEIN II BEGINS WITH SOMEONE'S HEAD BEING CHOPPED OFF AND THEN THE TEXT IN THE MENUS AND THE HUD GETS ALL FUCKED UP AND I CAN'T PLAY IT ANYMORE (THANKS OBAMA) pants: T DEUCE C'EST LA BALLS pants: (SUCH ARE BALLS) deuce: I DON'T THINK "BALLS" WOULD BE FEMININE SINGULAR [AUTISTIC MAN RESPONDS]
deuce
pants
#autism
#balls
#beheading
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#french
#grammar
#nu-urinal-background
#obama
#somber-deuce
#wolfenstein
6,835 11/30/2017 no way mine's smaller
deuce: LGHLAHGLAHGLAHGLAHGLAHGLAHGA pants: GHLAGHLHUALGHALGHULAG pants: MINE'S SMALLER deuce: NO WAY, MINE'S SMALLER pants: PUSH IT SOMEWHAT WELL deuce: YOU SHOULD PROBABLY, MAYBE DO IT; THEREFORE, PUT SOME BUT NOT ALL, OF YOUR BACK INTO IT
deuce
pants
#cocksucking-noises
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#urinal-background
6,836 12/1/2017 a lot more
(pants): PENIS PUMP(S) deuce: ONE OR MORE PENIS PUMPS deuce: PROBABLY MORE (deuce): A LOT MORE
deuce
pants
#clipart
#coffee
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#onomatopoeia
#penis-pump
#whisper
#white-background
6,837 12/2/2017 scared to break the glass
pants: BLINK BLINK spigot: WHAT ABOUT THE SEPARATION OF DICKS AND PRICKS????? spigot: WHAT ABOUT THE SEPARATION OF BLURKS AND BLORKS?????? spigot: WHAT ABOUT THE SEPARATION OF DONGS AND BONGS??????? spigot: I AM SCARED TO BREAK THE GLASS
pants
spigot
#bill-of-rights
#first-amendment
#mountain-background
#pants-spigot
#repetition
6,838 12/3/2017 try asking nicely
spigot: I'M GOING TO HOPE SHE DOESN'T TAKE MY MAN JUST BECAUSE SHE CAN pants: MAYBE IF WE ASK NICELY
pants
spigot
#dolly-parton
#jolene
#pants-spigot
#sfw
#single-panel
#woodring-den-background
6,839 12/4/2017 how to skip small talk and have deep conversations
pants: DICKS deuce: I SEE
deuce
pants
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dicks
#dicks-exe
#filename
#how-to
#nu-urinal-background
#somber-deuce
6,840 12/5/2017 no idea where i put that blade
spigot: WHILE YOU WERE OUT LICKING DICK, I WAS STUDYING THE BLADE AND LICKING DICK deuce: SO YOU'RE MORE PRODUCTIVE IS WHAT YOU'RE SAYING spigot: NO IDEA WHERE I PUT THAT BLADE
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#dicklicking
#hospital-background
#memes
#somber-deuce
6,841 12/6/2017 farts in a coffee can
spigot: SOMEONE SHOULD TELL STEPHEN HAWKING HIS VOICE IS LIKE FARTS IN A COFFEE CAN spigot: YES COFFEE IS AVAILABLE IN CANS !!!!!!!! spigot: WE'RE TALKIN' YUBAN spigot: WE'RE TALKIN' SANKA spigot: FOLGERS ANYONE ?????? spigot: MAYBE A LITTLE MJB ??????? spigot: OH!!! DON'T MIND ME!!! I'M JUST ***CHOCK FULL O'NUTS*** spigot: SERIOUSLY MY WIFE IS VERY ILL AND SUFFERING FROM ****MEDAGLIA D'ORO**** spigot: BOOM, ANOTHER COFFEE IN A CAN spigot: MAXWELL HOUSE spigot: HILLS BROS. spigot: THE ONLY THING STEPHEN HAWKING SHOULD SAY IS EXTERMINATE
spigot
#branding
#clipart
#coffee
#dr-who
#empty-auditorium-background
#frog
#frog-tips
#spigot-solo
#stephen-hawking
#url
6,842 12/7/2017 everyone take their places
deuce: EVERYONE TAKE THEIR PLACES pants: T DEUCE THIS LYING ABOUT THE SIZE (LENGTH/GIRTH) OF MY DONG HAS TO STOP deuce: SURFACE AREA, VOLUME, GROWTH RATE pants: AND YOU CAN SEE HOW BIG IT REALLY IS
deuce
pants
#deuce-pants
#dj-rapekit
#dong
#lies
#somber-deuce
#urinal-background
6,843 12/8/2017 marie curie
deuce: MADAME CURIE WAS A WHORE deuce: THERE I'VE SAID IT deuce: MAN I'VE BEEN HOLDING THAT IN FOR A LONG TIME
deuce
#deuce-solo
#empty-auditorium-background
#jean-charles
#science
6,844 12/9/2017 questioning reality
deuce: IS THIS THE REAL WORLD pants: NAH
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#existential
#high-res
#nu-urinal-background
#queen
#sfw
#single-panel
6,845 12/10/2017 butternut squash soup
deuce: BUTTERNUT SQUASH SOUP $10 deuce: I'M NOT EATING AT LEAST TWO OF THOSE WORDS
deuce
#deuce-solo
#food
#frog
#frog-tips
#sfw
#smouldering-crater
#somber-deuce
#soup
#woodring-field-background-2
6,846 12/11/2017 welcome to monday
pants: WELCOME TO MONDAY pants: SO FAR I'M NOT SURE I CARE FOR IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! pants: PROGRESS: COLD, STUPID spigot: PASSWORD STRENGTH: FARTS
pants
spigot
#farts
#monday
#nu-urinal-background
#pants-spigot
#sfw
6,847 12/12/2017 who would win
pants: ED EMBERLEY VS RICHARD SCARRY: WHO WOULD WIN deuce: RICHARD SCARRY WOULD BRING A GUN
deuce
pants
#busytown
#celebrity-deathmatch
#clip-art
#deuce-pants
#ed-emberley
#lowly-worm
#richard-scarry
#sfw
#single-panel
#white-background
6,848 12/13/2017 the hiccups
deuce: I HAVE THE HICCUPS deuce: THEREFORE YOU MUST ALL DIE
deuce
#deuce-solo
#hiccups
#lynnea
#sfw
#somber-deuce
#uncredited-character
#urinal-background
6,849 12/14/2017 aloud a lot
pants: EVERYBODY DANCE NOW spigot: ARE WE STILL SAYING "NUGGG" WITH A LOG OF G'S AND THEN 'ANAL' spigot: I KNOW I AM pants: I SAY "DICKS" ALOUD A LOT
pants
spigot
#anal
#c-and-c-music-factory
#dicks
#meta
#nuggh
#pants-spigot
#white-background
6,850 12/15/2017 did i mention
spigot: DID I MENTION I LICK DICK spigot: LET. THAT. SINK. IN.
spigot
#armando
#dicklicking
#irc
#spigot-solo
#woodring-stairs-background
6,851 12/16/2017 our past experiences
spigot: SHOULD WE GO AROUND THE ROOM OPENING UP ABOUT OUR PAST EXPERIENCES WITH ABUSE????? spigot: I'LL START: I THINK ALL FLAVORS OF PRINGLES ARE GOOD deuce: ROGER THOSE DROPS
deuce
spigot
#deuce-spigot
#fat
#nu-urinal-background
#pringles
#somber-deuce
6,852 12/17/2017 or however many dicks there are
spigot: IMAGINE YOU CAN PUT ONLY ONE DICK OR THE OTHER DICK OR BOTH DICKS IN YOUR MOUTH - OR HOWEVER MANY DICKS THERE ARE spigot: THAT'S NET NEUTRALITY
spigot
#current-events
#dicks
#grey-background
#net-neutrality
#spigot-solo
6,853 12/18/2017 my private thoughts
deuce: UNDERWEAR IS THE ONLY THING KEEPING POO OUT OF YOUR PANTS pants: SAY AGAIN ???? deuce: NOTHING pants: I HEARD PANTS!!! deuce: NO pants: AND POO AND UNDERWEAR!!! deuce: HOW ARE YOU HEARING MY PRIVATE THOUGHTS pants: WE ARE LIKE THE DREAMER WHO DREAMS AND THEN LIVES INSIDE THE DREAM deuce: THE ANCIENT PHRASE
deuce
pants
#angry-panel
#black-background
#bonequest-hi-fi
#bored-pants
#deuce-pants
#dream
#dream-within-a-dream
#drunk-deuce
#huffy-pants
#poo
#trousers
#twin-peaks
6,854 12/19/2017 and also ten james francos
spigot: THINKING MAYBE HOUSE OF CARDS WITH NO ROBIN WRIGHT BUT KEVIN SPACEY IN A DRESS AND ALSO TEN JAMES FRANCOS
spigot
#boy-scouts
#cocksucking
#james-franco
#kevin-spacey
#neon-grid-background
#robin-wright
#single-panel
#spigot-solo
#television
6,855 12/20/2017 ethical dilemma
spigot:'PLZ BEAT ME OFF' TATTOO PUTS DOCTORS IN ETHICAL DILEMMA spigot: WISHING EVERYONE A MERRY VLOGMAS deuce: LIVE TWEETING MY MYOCARDIAL INFARCTION
deuce
spigot
#angry-panel
#beating-off
#bonequest-hi-fi
#christmas
#deuce-spigot
#drunk-deuce
#ethics
#heart-attack
#medicine
#tattoo
#twitter
#vlog
#woodring-stairs-background
#youtube
6,856 12/21/2017 what we really need
pants: WELL I'M GONNA GO HANG OUT WITH MY NEW FRIEND RACHEL MADDOW ON MSNBC BYE FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!! deuce: L8R pants: NOT LAWRENCE O'DONNELL THOUGH HE'S A HUGE GRABBY GUS pants: I'M ROCK HARD AND READY TO PARTY pants: GOT ANY BLOW (SNIFF) pants: WHAT I MEAN IS THAT YOU BLOW ME pants: DON'T BE SHY, FORM A LINE TO THE RIGHT pants: WHAT WE REALLY NEED ARE DEEPER MUSTARD JARS THAT I CAN DIP MY DICK ALL THE WAY INTO
deuce
pants
#cocaine
#coy-pants
#deuce-pants
#dipping
#drunk-deuce
#funloving-nonsense
#goodbye-to-all-my-online-friends-forever
#huffy-pants
#marijuana
#msnbc
#mustard
#stoned
#television
#urinal-background
#weird-pants-face
6,857 12/22/2017 lives on with us forever
pants: MY BONER WILL NEVER DIE deuce: HE THAT BELIEVETH IN ME SHALL HAVE A BONER THAT WILL LIVE FOREVER pants: THE BEAUTY OF THEIR SOULS deuce: THEY DON'T HAVE SOULS
deuce
pants
#boner
#deuce-pants
#jesus
#religion
#skinny-puppy
#souls
#title-mismatch
#woodring-stairs-background
6,858 12/23/2017 you gonna eat that
pants: DO YOU NEED MORE PISS pants: BECAUSE I'VE GOT PLENTY MORE pants: AND I'M IN THE MOOD pants: THAT'S IMPORTANT YOU KNOW pants: ANYWAY: BE MY URINAL FOR CHRISTMAS deuce: CAN I GO NOW pants: YOU KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO (IGNORE ME, IT'LL STOP EVENTUALLY) pants: YOU GONNA EAT THAT deuce: <CRICKETS>
deuce
pants
#bay-area
#christmas
#crickets
#deuce-pants
#funloving-nonsense
#huffy-pants
#mountain-background
#piss
#san-francisco
#you-know-what-to-do
6,859 12/24/2017 hgblhbgl gblblgbl
deuce: GIVEN THAT THIS IS THE DAY OF JESUS' BIRTH LET'S ALL LICK DICK [WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS] spigot: NOT REALLY pants: BACK ON MY BULLSHIT spigot: HGBLHBGL GBLBLLGBL
deuce
pants
spigot
#back-on-my-bullshit
#christmas
#cronch
#deuce-pants-spigot
#emoji
#gobble
#grey-background
#onomatopoeia
#turkey
6,860 12/25/2017 sorry to be the one
deuce: THE DRUNK GUY WITH THE FAKE BEARD WHOSE LAP YOU SIT ON DOESN'T ACTUALLY BRING YOU SHIT ON CHRISTMAS deuce: I'M SORRY TO BE THE ONE TO HAVE TO TELL YOU THIS pants: I KNEW THE WHOLE TIME, I JUST WANTED SOME LAP
deuce
pants
#bonequest-hi-fi
#caption
#christmas
#christmas-tree-lights
#deuce-pants
#lap
#santa
#somber-deuce
#stage-directions
#woodring-room-background
6,861 12/26/2017 the letter
pants: SSSSSNAKES SSSSSSSUCKING THINGSSSSSSSSSS deuce: SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUCKING
deuce
pants
#clipart
#deuce-pants
#high-res
#nu-urinal-background
#repetition
#sfw
#single-panel
#snake
6,862 12/27/2017 so sick of your self-indulgent shit
pants: HTTPS://WWW.GOOGLE.COM/SEARCH?Q="SUCH+IS+THE+WIND+BLOWN+LIFE+OF+A+SAILOR" deuce: I'M SO SICK OF YOUR SELF-INDULGENT SHIT deuce: I MEAN GOOD MORNING deuce: "ALEXA, GIVE ME SOME JERKOFF INSTRUCTION."
deuce
pants
#alexa
#amazon
#deja-vu
#deuce-pants
#insult
#joi
#morning
#sailor
#shit
#the-wind-blown-life-of-a-sailor
#url
#woodring-field-background
6,863 12/28/2017 yelling a lot
deuce: WHAT IS THAT MAN DOING WITH HIS SHITS pants: IN MY BEDROOM WHERE MY WIFE SLEEPS pants: WHERE MY CHILDREN COME AND PLAY WITH THEIR TOYS pants: IN MY HOME
deuce
pants
#al-pacino
#deuce-pants
#drunk-deuce
#duh
#huffy-pants
#the-godfather-part-two
#title-mismatch
#wife
#woodring-field-background
6,864 12/29/2017 okay okay already
deuce: IT'S COLD pants: PISSING deuce: SOMEONE HOLD ME pants: PISSING!!! deuce: I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME pants: PISSING!!!!!!!!!! deuce: OKAY OKAY ALREADY deuce: JEEZ
deuce
pants
#a-love-story
#deuce-pants
#huffy-pants
#neon-grid-background
#piss
6,865 12/30/2017 a cup of sugar
effigy: CAN I BORROW A CUP OF SUGAR? effigy: I'M TRYING TO GET A HUMMINGBIRD TO DRINK OUT OF MY PENIS. deuce: BORROW ??? NO deuce: HAVE ??? YES
deuce
effigy
#correct-grammar
#deuce-effigy
#drunk-deuce
#hummingbird
#nature
#ornithology
#penis
#sounding
#woodring-room-background
6,866 12/31/2017 the big mouth noise
pants: MAKING THE BIG MOUTH NOISE deuce: WHAT'S THE BIG MOUTH NOISE pants: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA deuce: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
deuce
pants
#bonghit
#deuce-pants
#filename
#mouth
#mouth-of-pants
#nu-urinal-background
#onomatopoeia
#screaming
#sfw
#sound

EPISODES: 2017

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